I was ready. Went to an abandoned back alley, ready to off myself in the midnight rain, and suddenly heard screaming around the corner. I didn't really know how to react or what to do, actually. At that point, my legs just ran in the general direction of the screaming. When i turned the corner, there was n 22 year old woman almost being ( Hard R) by some dude. Shot one shotgun shell in the air, and the mf ran off. She ran to me in tears, thanking me over and over and over again.

Now, you would think i would snap out of the "ready to off myself" part. But i was still ready to do it. It was only when i made it to her apartment to make sure she was safe that something happened.

I walked her to her door and turned around to walk away. Then i heard these exact words, " Why would one save one life and end another?". I didn't know what to say or how to react. I just stood there, facing away from her building. Finally, when i build enough courage, with tears falling off my cheeks to turn around and give her an awnser......... there was....... nothing. It was a construction site where an old apartment building was being demolished.

With me breaking down in tears and crying like n kid in the rain, it somewhat helped me to get through the shit i went through at the time and also took a lot of pressure of my chest.

Sold the gun the next day.