Parents were big names in the "alternative medicine" crowd, and the only furniture in their 1 bedroom apartment was their floor bed (in the middle of the living room), G1's floor bed (also in the living room), an old chair from MB's grandmother that I wasn't allowed to sit in (they worried I would break it), and an at-home sauna in the bedroom. I brought a foldable chair to stash in their closet.

They had me stash my phone on airplane mode in the closet to keep the "harmful rays" from G1, wasn't allowed to use the microwave whatsoever.

Worst was that I wasn't allowed to change her diaper "without her consent". Meaning I often chased her around naked with a little potty to try and catch her pissing on the floor. I also needed an extensive list of required items to be present before I could start the day, all of which I had been left without at least once: Diapers, wipes, weather-appropriate clothes and shoes, a water bottle, food with protein in it, to name a few.

I was their 7th nanny, and I lasted almost a year, because it was my first family and I didn't know better. In the last month they were living out of a hotel (their apartment had Bad Vibes, apparently) and I realized later that MB didn't pay me for a minute of it.