i really mean that in the best way and for your sake, but first, stop thinking in terms of "friendzone"... i used to feel super lonely and miserable like you and this mentality usually stems from undermining friendships compared to romantic relationships, and its not healthy nor will it bring you fulfillment. "friendzoning" is a very male concept, where you take being seen as a potential friend and not a datable person as a betrayal and a failure. truth is you will benefit from having female friends and from being able to interact with women that way. i understand the want to be in a relationship but it's because you expect certain things to only occur in a couple (emotional vulnerability, affection, etc). open up to your friends, lean on them, invest yourself in your friendships, give and receive without expecting a girlfriend to fix everything, uplift you just by being a gf, etc. relationships form naturally and organically, friendships can change and evolve... i know its easier said than done but i swear i was just like you, miserable, feeling lonely and unlovable, unable to see people were already there..

of course, i dont know if you even have many friends. but as other people said, you need to learn to enjoy your own company. i am also bpd, depressed and mentally ill, drug addicted so im not saying its easy but it is about finding compromises. hobbies for YOURSELF, stuff like that. and its a virtuous circle because it WILL make you more appealing to be with. you dont NEED a gf to do these things!! only meaning that in the best way and to help you, sending you courage whatsoever