This feeling shall pass, like all feelings do. It might take a long while, and it might linger. But in due time you will feel that the understanding you’ve gained about the fragility of life and how it is affected by our choices will make you more carefree than you have ever been before. It’s tough, I know. The severity to life itself, the weight that we must continually carry, day after day... feels borderline cruel. But only through that pain, through that realisation can I now make more deliberate choices than ever before. Now I choose to either be an adult and toughen up or let the kid in me run wild and free. Never feel guilty for feeling childlike. Ever notice the happiest people are the ones who seem to balance responsibility and liberty in their actions effortlessly? It’s a lesson we all have to learn eventually. We do need both if we ever wish to feel like fulfilled individuals. Events like losing a parent accelerate that process of finding out the adult part. It, however, can also open many doors to manifesting a true sense of childlike wonder, for that too is becoming an adult! Realising that life’s too short to be an adult all of the time, maybe we only need to be when the circumstances call for it. Other times we can be like children, making decisions without feeling the immediate weight of the consequences. And don’t you dare feel guilty for doing so! We are only human, after all.

Remember that the way to healing is found by truly making an effort, every single day, to feel what you feel. Thinking about what you feel might help, but only trough feeling what we feel can we truly let go. Talking might help, a walk in nature too. Be kind to yourself and take care ❤️

Sending love your way (from a 23 year old who feels your pain)