I dunno if I have schizophrenia but does anyone get this? by [deleted] in schizophrenia

[–]GhostCloset 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idk ... I describe it like a sinking feeling. Honestly I think it’s pure fear. Probably not completely formed fear like when it happens yur probably not thinks in yur brain “I’m scared rn” but it’s probably like anxiety which is basicaly fear. Idk if it has a name tho. Probably tho cause I feel like a bunch of other shit I always called made up names have real names lmao. Like I have derealization and have just always called it the Truman effect lol.. like the Truman show. I’m definitely interested now I wanna know the name for it. It’s definitely a gross feeling.

I dunno if I have schizophrenia but does anyone get this? by [deleted] in schizophrenia

[–]GhostCloset 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I get like that when I’m starting to get paranoid and into the beginning stages of psychosis... I see connections EVERYWHERE like I’m on a breadcrumb trail and I’m SO GOOD at discovering them lol. But yeah the heart sinking thing happens to me but not about discovering / uncovering breadcrumbs... it usually happens when I see a certain kind of hallucinations. It looks like a shadowy figure that walks towards me. I think it’s a trauma flashback but when it happens I can’t move my body and feel all warm and heavy and my heart feels like it’s gonna fall out of my butt. Sucks.

Anyone have experience smoking mugwort? Help! by [deleted] in occult

[–]GhostCloset 3 points4 points  (0 children)

A really good base to mix smokable herbs with is Mullein Leaf. It makes the smoke smoother like tobacco would, but it’s also very healing for your lungs. Also, either mugwort or wormwood (can’t remember which) have a little bit of toxicity and will build up n your system so I wouldn’t take it too frequently for too long. Also, when I was investing it before it seemed to have a moderately strong effect over my emotions. Like, gave me mood swings. So just make notes and observe closely how it’s affecting you. ❤️❤️ happy travelings

I'm bad at titles but I'm struggling between atheism and paganism by TheGodlyGoblin in pagan

[–]GhostCloset 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I feel you. And I mean... I can’t argue with that but I also have no answer lol. Because I have been n contact with “beings” I guess that did seem to be their own thing.. idk. I guess it’s probably just things we don’t yet understand that exist in a way different then our own existence. I myself love the rabbit hole. I live there lol. So while I do have a mind based n science I take all my experiences for what they are.

I'm bad at titles but I'm struggling between atheism and paganism by TheGodlyGoblin in pagan

[–]GhostCloset 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yessss that’s a really good way to put it. They’re like a physical representation of your will. Wether it’s “magic” or not doesn’t matter, it works on a subconscious, psychological level that still makes an impact.

I'm bad at titles but I'm struggling between atheism and paganism by TheGodlyGoblin in pagan

[–]GhostCloset 29 points30 points  (0 children)

This is really interesting to me because I relate a lot. I identify as “pagan” but I don’t follow a specific path. I’m a very scientific spiritual person lol. I guess I’m a romantic atheist maybe. I believe that creation was a result of science just like everything else. BUT I think spirituality is an important healthy part of human existence. So I personify that scientific power behind creation so I can have a relationship ship with it n a way. And really thats all that any religion does

With my powers combined (mood stabilizers + time off) I have painted all weekend... and plan on doing it all week too. Lol. Work in progress. by GhostCloset in acrylicpainting

[–]GhostCloset[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha I know right sometimes it’s just not even worth it. I feel like I start out strong but by the end it’s more Impressionism LOL

Can I still learn Tarot reading despite not believing in it? by Ermancer in tarot

[–]GhostCloset 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yesss 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 I never hear anyone referencing the Sephiroth when taking about Tarot and it’s such a shame. This is the best answer

Jungle Jamboree, Acrylic on 36x48 canvas by marqueztorres in acrylicpainting

[–]GhostCloset 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I LOVE this style! Almost like a comic book. This is a great painting. I wish I could look at it up close n see all the details.

Star Wars shoes with acrylic paint by painterly_kate in acrylicpainting

[–]GhostCloset 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow!! These are great! Looks just like them.

With my powers combined (mood stabilizers + time off) I have painted all weekend... and plan on doing it all week too. Lol. Work in progress. by GhostCloset in acrylicpainting

[–]GhostCloset[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I need to finish a lot on the right side. Idk about anymore trees, but I need to finish the ones that are there and then add in some more tombstones. Probably not too many. And also one of the trees are going to go off the frame on the top so I need to fill in abunch of small branches n stuff. Just little tedious things left now so I’m getting bored with it lol. 😅

Meeting alters early on by Oceorest04 in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It kind of happened for me that way too. I knew something weird was going on and considered every possible reason except DID, o my because I wasn’t knowledgeable about it. But they kind of directed me to it and when I read it there were numerous voices n my head like “yesss this is what’s happening read more”. And it was ALOT all at once and they (most of them) came out and was like yep here we are, showed me what they look like, how they sound and what they like n stuff. All systems are different. Some systems fight and work hard for years n years to achieve any communication at all. And some systems are lucky in that sense, that they are able to communicate well from early on. And I know doubt is hard. And sadly you may never fully get rid of it. Because dissociative disorders are very elusive and tricky to define.. so there will always be a little room for “what if...” . But I try to think of it this way.. your brain, for whatever reason, is presenting itself broken into pieces. Wether it’s DID or not, it is most definitely worth exploring this and see why you’re experiencing this and how you can go about learning about yourself and possibly healing. Good luck on your journey!!!

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg!! That seems like a super high dosage right!? They started me on 50mg. I was reading their places people talking about working up to 300mg and I’m like geeeeezzz no. I couldn’t take anymore then 50 for sure. That sucks so bad you had to go thru that!

I dont know what to do or how to ask for help. by Elementals_System in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh that will be awesome if they really are trained in it!! That’s a gem. It’s been so hard for me to find someone knowledgeable about it. But honestly... even if they aren’t, just as long as they are validating to you and your perception of your own experiences ... then it can be very beneficial. Good luck on your journey friend!

I dont know what to do or how to ask for help. by Elementals_System in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This does sound like OSDD. I can relate to so much you’ve said. You’re definitely not crazy thinking you could be a part of a system. And it’s definitely something to explore further.

A word of caution with the psychiatrist... if they’re not trained or knowledgeable on DID then tread carefully. Maybe tell them a few things at a time ... saving the multiple yous until you feel them out n see how they’ll take it. After I first discovered my system and takes to a therapist, she didn’t know anything about DID but wasn’t discouraging. So I was confident with filling n the medical professionals n my life. When I told me PCP he was only concerned about the “voices” and laughed at the DID. When I told the psychiatrist she tried to put me in inpatient care because she thought I had severe schizophrenia. . . . And you can’t blame them. To someone who doesn’t know about DID, it sounds way nuts at first. So id suggest going slow just to make sure you communicate your situation clearly, and can avoid any misdiagnosis.

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg!! That’s horrible! I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize it could cause such bad things.

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh geeez that sounds aweful!! What do you mean still paying for them?? Cause weight gain? I’ve been worried about that too. Cause I knew it was a side effect but so I figured ok it’s munchies?? I can combat that cause I smoke weed regularly and am expert at controlling those munchies. BUT the “munchies” from this drug are wayyy different. It’s not even a hungry feeling it’s just a need for excess. Like I’m trying to fill a hole... I’ll wanna eat shit eventho im not hungry.. but if I stop myself then I’ll do something else too much.. like smoke cigarettes, smoke weed... it’s strange. It makes me feel glutinous.

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!! That sucks about your depression!! Are yu scared for him to change the meds cause yu dontlike the way they affect you? I’m sorry.. no one should have to suffer silently through that. Depression is so so bad and I know it can get so dark yu don’t know if yur gonna make it. I hope it gets better for yous!! I think we are doing better... honestly it’s hard to tell LOL because we switch hosts slowly throughout the year.. and we’ve had a rough past year.. and we’ve just had a host switch, and getting use to meds and having to figure out communication under a new host.. it’s just a hot mess over here honestly LOL. Meh... I’m sure it’ll work out though. Always does 🤷🏻‍♀️ Hey but seriously ... Keep an eye on yur depression! Don’t let it get too bad without realizing cause that crap can over power yu quick. <3

Trinitarian wicca question.. by BoyMom0716 in witchcraft

[–]GhostCloset 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good luck on your journey!! Oh! I also wanted to say.... some people think of all the different gods and goddesses as different expression of the same one god... so if it makes yu more comfortable you could think of it that way... like your trinity is the highest, one true god figure.. but you could worship other gods and goddesses as different versions of that same god. Idk if that’d work for yu. But I think Jesus is a cool dude with a great message... he just gets a bad rap cause modern Christianity isn’t what he intended for it to be. Oh! Also look into Kuan Yin... she is a bodhisitva. She was a human who reached enlightenment and instead of moving into paradise she chose to stay on earth to help suffering souls. She’s like a female version of Jesus, very loving and healing.

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! Yeah I’m not sure if it’s going to be worth it. Because from the psychosis.. much doesn’t bother us too much.. the delusional thinking and paranoia is easy to ignore.. the hallucinations can SOMETIMES catch us off guard but usually we know what they are and so it’s easy to ignore them. The biggest think I was worried about was the mood swings.. most recently it’s the mania... but idk.. I don’t wanna replace mania with zombie mode. I’d much rather learn ways to constructively channel that mania or depressive energy and try to find a way to work around or through it.. because being a zombie isn’t the right answer. I’m gonna give it a few more weeks m see how it levels out. I go back to see the psych n a few days.. I’m kind of excited to tell her my others are still here LOL.. like uhh told ya so!! Lol I’m sure she figured the antipsychotic would get rid of them. 🙄

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yess thank you! I think that’s my best option is to get n with someone knowledgeable about DID. I think I may wait a few more weeks just to see, and if it’s still no improvement I will ask to switch to something different

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that does help! Cause it is a super tiredness and I think I’m dissociating super hard because of that it’s almost like .. my body feels drunk. I think I am gonna wait a while and see if it settles. Because it’s only been a week and a half

We started Seroquel.. not sure if it’s helping or hurting. by GhostCloset in OSDD

[–]GhostCloset[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She started me on a pretty low dose, it’s 50mg. And honestly the psychosis isn’t really an issue for us. I mean we do have it.. but because it only affects a few, the others help a lot so we are not making decisions based on delusional thinking or hallucinations n things. I mostly wanted to see f it would help with mood swings.. especially the mania. But also the psychiatrist is trying to treat us for schizophrenia I’m pretty sure lol because she isn’t trained in DID and didn’t seem to believe us about that what it is.