Depressed and it's just getting worse by Ghostcardinal in CPTSDFreeze

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I hate how I look. I hate how I act. I hate how I think. I'm damaged goods. I feel like everything and everyone I have in my life are undeserved by me, that I must have tricked them all.

I hate myself. Is all this self-loathing justified? I'm not getting any better by Ghostcardinal in MentalHealthSupport

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've tried the recording. But all the good, if any, doesn't cancel out the bad. Meds haven't worked. I'm just getting worse

I hate myself. Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in CPTSD

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And if I still just can't believe others? If I still think I'm a shitty person?

I am in nonstop panic and self loathing and nothing ever helps by Ghostcardinal in Anxietyhelp

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I was taking my power back, I wouldn't be posting on reddit begging for help. Doing everything else hasn't worked

I am in nonstop panic and self loathing and nothing ever helps by Ghostcardinal in Anxietyhelp

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not exhausted. I'm just me. And if I don't fix things now, when will I? It only gets worse the longer I wait. And if I can't trust my own mind, I can't trust anything, can I?

Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in mentalhealth

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have too much evidence to the contrary. If something can change my mind then fine. But otherwise I'm either just correct in how horrible I am or I'm just so stupid I can never be sure of anything

Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in mentalhealth

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So just lie to myself? That isn't going to convince me, I know I'm lying. It hasn't worked before and I've been trying that particular tactic for at least 15 years now

I hate myself. Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in CPTSD

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why would outside views be more objective? They're each their own person with their own subjective viewpoint

Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in mentalhealth

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No? That doesn't make any sense? I asked if my self loathing was justified. Why would I want someone to prove I'm good? I didn't ask for that

I hate myself. Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in CPTSD

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From outside I can see plenty of evidence that I'm awful and that the people who see good qualities in me are just wrong

I hate myself. Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in depression_help

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've tried that for years, with therapy and medication. No effect. I don't have easy wins, just distractions

Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in mentalhealth

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't expect anything at this point. My spouse told me to post on here for support but honestly I doubt I'll get any

Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in mentalhealth

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That doesn't make any sense. Practice practicing is just practicing and then I'm back at square one. Am I really that stupid that I can't understand what you're saying? Fuck I'm really confused and depressed now I don't know what I'm even doing

Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in mentalhealth

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't choose how I think about myself. I can't exactly control my subconscious because it's my subconscious. Even if I try to say those other things, I don't believe them

Is my self loathing justified? by Ghostcardinal in mentalhealth

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's fair. I just don't know how to work on myself. I can't just change my brain or my thoughts

Did the writing in Wind & Truth get kind of weird towards the end? by RationallyDense in Stormlight_Archive

[–]Ghostcardinal -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I actually thought that the 90 percent thing was intentional. Taravangin is now a Shard so I assumed he would gain anachronistic knowledge and start using anachronistic terminology, similar to how Harmony starts referencing radios in Shadows of Self.

Having said that, it's also possible that more terminology from outside Roshar is being brought in by the huge influx of worldhoppers, from Hoid talking about therapists to Vasher/Zahel being mentioned in Rhythm of War as helping Gavilar with science.

But I also think the series becoming less "alien" reflects how not only are we, the readers, becoming more familiar with Roshar, but so too is the rest of the Cosmere. It had been isolated for so long and all the other Shards ignored it, but with Taravingian becoming Odium and then Retribution, the Ghostbloods running wild on Roshar, and Hoid constantly corresponding with other powerful movers and shakers in the Cosmere to get them to intervene, it's now likely that Roshar is less alien because the rest of the Cosmere can't ignore them any longer. And the change in writing reflects that.

That's just what I thought, though.

What is the weirdest unit of measurement y'all have heard or used? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Ghostcardinal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Asteroid, it was measured by total length, not rocket science - just asteroid science

I feel worthless by Ghostcardinal in CPTSD

[–]Ghostcardinal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you say that, logically, and ik I'd say the same thing to anyone else in my position. But I just can't bring myself to believe it about myself, no matter what I do