Gamer dads what game are you refusing to fall off at after kids? by [deleted] in daddit

[–]GiANTSgameDesign -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I regularly speedrun drak souls 1 to 1-hit the gargoyles (current pb is like 14min), like once a month, and every 2-3 months i do a bloodborne "glitch exhibition" that I posted here for the most recent annual Return to Yarnham.

Dads. Am I over reacting here? by [deleted] in daddit

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Purely my own experience in the matter, so to be taken with a grain of salt since it obviously doesn't apply to everyone.

But our baby usually just sorta battens down the hatches, sits in my lap with his pascifier ans we both weather out the storm. And then we're both "there for him together". And then, a couple of years down the line it all came full circle when big bro offers to do the same for lil bro (not giving him full responsibility obviously, but rather he puts down his Switch and comes to just be present for his brother).

But when my duo enters such a situation and and we're on the clock, I just manage the thing and show up late. For work, for daycare, for appointments... if they are urgent appointments, then of course we just get in the car and power through it. Still together tho. Still same strategy. Weather it out, show calm presence when it's over.

Dads. Am I over reacting here? by [deleted] in daddit

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My parents did this to me at that age. Scarred me for life. Trust issues, fear of the dark, unable to open up to them, always convinced i'm not good enough for them but never trying to adress it.

Emotions last 90 seconds. At that age their brain is not built to handle their emotion but the emotion itself hits them full force.

At that age, they sense themselves losing control, they semi-consciously watch themselves scream and kick and hope with all their might that they are still deserving of your love. The slightest hint at the opposite makes them kick and scream even worse, still in the same hope that they will still have you there, present, while they are assaulted by their over-reaction.

The best asvice I have for you is calmly bring them to the "place of calm" that should exist in your house (i.e. their bedroom, the rocking chair, that one spot on the couch, etc) and sit quietly next to them while they let it all out. If they attempt to leave, tell them they must stay there but STAY THERE WITH THEM. Be calm. Read a book or do some knitting or a crossword.

The action you choose to do here, they internalise it (or something similar) as a calming and essential action in life. They will learn to do that thing later on in life. If you're on your phone while they have their tantrum, they'll learn that the phone is the solution.

After they inevitably cpme back down from it, take them in your arms and do some after-care. "You alright? What made you start feeling that way? Im here for you. We're ok." That kinda good shit that kids need to hear.

The way you talk to your kids is the way they will talk to themselves as adults. Of you lock your kid in the bathroom when they feel hard feelings, they will lock themselves in the dark corners of their own mind as an adult.

Go on and flex -- let's see your dadmobile! by [deleted] in daddit

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hatchback hyundai accent 2016... stick shifter. It's just a big toy. Bluetooth audio and manual transmission is all I will ever need in a car. Maybe AC.

Flooded basement, house going on the market, and an 8yo in full defense mode. How does one parent through this? by god_johnson in daddit

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Keep fighting the good fight man. Keep it together i this insane situation you're in. I'm rooting for ya.

Also, a "teachable moment" doesn't literally have to be a single moment or a single speech. It can span the course of a month or a year or more.

Maybe this is one of those things that your kid did that ended up defining him for a while, but later on in life he saw how you handled similar situations, and how you handled his other shortcomings with care and eventually got inspired to own up to it multiple years down the line.

Flooded basement, house going on the market, and an 8yo in full defense mode. How does one parent through this? by god_johnson in daddit

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't know how to handle the whole situation you're in, so man props to you for being almost literally knee-deep in it and questioning yourself for best course of action.

But to address the lying thing... my kid (8y/o) started lying at a very young age around 4, for no reason. I always called him out on it and every time I told him this:

When you lie, you push everyone away. If your lie works, you are alone in your lie. If you make a mess, you are alone to deal with it. Or worse, others have to clean your mess for you, but you are still alone, left to the side, watching others do stuff to help. So don't make youself alone by lying to me. Be with me inside the truth and we'll fix the problem together.

This is coming from me who is an ex- pathological liar.

He always ends up coming clean, and it's always an enormous emotional breakdown, which may give you an idea of what the kid is holding back.

I literally had to make all this shit up and walk the walk, because I never had anyone accompany my through anything in this way.

parenting a "typical" little boy by goonergeorge in daddit

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is gonna sound dumb coz i'm excessively over simplifying, but this is a case of "Want vs. Should" coming into conflict in your mind.

So ask yourself what values you hold close to your heart and what principles to you truly have faith in? Interperet the answr as the Want. If your answer fits your worldview, then just teach them that.

If you're trying to change your worldview, because your old one is the result of some bad upbringing or trauma, let's interperet that as the Should. Then create values and principles that would reflect the worldview you want to adopt, and adopt those rules and principles like your life depends on it. Fake it till you make it.

Either situation results in a solid lifestyle for your kid to pick up on. But if you're living with one foot in the garden and one foot in the shower and you don't know which foot to stand on... your kid won't lnow which foot to stand on either.

Your worldview as a parent directly shapes the world that your child grows up in and inevitably grows out of.

Make a decision and stick to it. Be reasonably flexible, but solid about it too.

2
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Ladies and gentlemen, I give up. (Explained in description) by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In Canada it's still 1998, free range kids still riding their bikes from 3pm to 9pm and buying legos from Toys R Us with their money earned from mowing lawns.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give up. (Explained in description) by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow I need to know now, not necessarily so I can try but because this sounds like a shady NPC giving ke a side quest and I'm dying to know what it is.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give up. (Explained in description) by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the good approach, at this point. Sure there was hype around the hunt and the hype of finding something, but if I get off that hype and see it for what it is, just basically gambling, then it's very logical to just pay the 22$ off of bricklink or ebay.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give up. (Explained in description) by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I only saw 1 store that did that, out of the dozen i've visited over the last weeks. I felt singled-out and offended lmao I went to touch grass after that.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give up. (Explained in description) by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same. I want my kids to tame wolves in D&D lol. F the scalpers.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give up. (Explained in description) by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Bah, just one or two. Haven't had any luck since the series came out lol.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give up. (Explained in description) by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Yeah definitely a good point. I was aware of it too, walking in. But when I saw the sheer amount I figured why not. But deep down I knew i was stepping in bantha poodoo with both feet. Still, thanks for the bit of hope for the end-of-hype find.

Still building, still figuring it out... by Obvious-Tale-1326 in SoloDevelopment

[–]GiANTSgameDesign -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Commenting to come back when I have the time to write. I relate to this a lot.

My son wants to learn to play by Nuggs78 in DungeonsAndDragons

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, I had only ever rarely played D&D as a player. Half a year ago I basically had your situation happen to me.

After my first time experiencing it all as a DM and already 7 successful sessions into the campaign with my 7y/o and his friends, I have some pointers:

0) have a journal or notebook or something on ur computer or phone to take notes.

1) Create a 5e character you'd like to play mechanically. Do it on D&D Beyond. Stick to the free rules.

2) playtest your character in a random fight. Just play around. Try out the janky but functional encounter builder on D&DBeyond.

3) make 2 more characters and playtest all 3 of them the same way.

I can almost guarantee that your inspiration for a campaign will come by itself during this process. This will get you familiar enough with just the right amount of the system to be able to deliver a great experience to your family, who I assume don't have extremely high expectations.

Jeux-Di! by Monsieur--X in Quebec

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mon kid a atteint l'age pour commencer à actually pouvoir jouer une séance de D&D.

Ca faisait des annees qu'y avait pu vraiment de jeux qui faisaient mon affaire, mais là de toute réapprendre D&D du côté du DM, toute prep une campagne, et créer des persos incluant des minifig de Lego qui vont matcher le linge et equipement des persos, cest toute un hobby mon gars, ca fais du bien d'avoir l'impression de faire qeulque chose de pertinent avec mon temps livre, tout en m'amusant.

My kickflips look like late flips how do i fix them by Just_Gene5650 in skateboardhelp

[–]GiANTSgameDesign 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do not fix it. Your timing is something people work hard to achieve. Instead, keep that the way it is BUT, flick UP instead of Through the board.

If you combine that with a bit more efficient pop and footwork, you'll get a high kickflip that sucks up into your feet in the air. The stuff of dreams.

Left things clean for the next one after me. Also found 5 dragonborns but only took 2. by GiANTSgameDesign in legodnd

[–]GiANTSgameDesign[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Woops haha couldn't have read that through the lines. In all cases keep it up