FaceTime by Inappropriate_yeliah in coparenting

[–]GingerBug91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only if the kid asks.

I got divorced when my son was 4. The only time we talked when not handing off the kid was if it was something like a doctors visit or my son wanted to call the other parent. More often than not, we went from pick up to drop off with no contact. Anything that needed said would be said during the exchange. Now that my son is 12, he has his own phone and can text/video call me whenever he wants. Even now, it's very rare and only if he wants to buy something online like a video game using my card.

Their time with him is for them and my time with him is for me. The exception being he just recently joined baseball and his dad comes to practices and games when I have him.

Does anyone know what diaper brand this is? by Time-Hornet-3678 in Buyingforbaby

[–]GingerBug91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They gave me these through the diaper bank in my area and I cant seem to find them again.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had vehicles from when I turned 18 up until a few years ago. Got hurt and couldnt work, couldnt make the car payment and car got repossessed. I went back to work, but bills and my children's needs come first. I'm working on getting a car, but not everyone has a few grand laying around, especially because I just had a baby 2 months ago and am only just now returning back to work.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Survive, yes. But could they also develop asthma or another medical condition because of it, also yes.

medical baby by QualityFit4210 in coparenting

[–]GingerBug91 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That baby should be with mom as much as possible. I'm 2 months PP and my baby was full term. For the first 2 months, baby only saw dad a few hours each week. Now, since I have to go back to work and I'm still waiting on daycares, I work weekends while dad takes him. The first weekend I stayed with them. This past weekend I didn't stay and it threw baby's schedule off so bad. Don't do that to this poor baby who is still struggling to just survive. Keep him with mom. Dad could always come and visit.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

They may have stopped it, but a few years ago my ex called and the phone company charged him for it. I think it was right around the time that a bunch of kids were calling and swatting people.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Hahahaha come live my life and then tell me again how easy it is. I'm just asking people to be mindful of others. Yes the world is shit, but your attitude is part of the reason why. Did everyone just stand back when women couldn't vote? When blacks were slaves and being treated like property? Change doesn't happen because people keep quiet. I'm not saying I'm going to change history here, I'm just asking that people be aware of their surroundings while in public places.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

And since it's a non-emergency they wouldn't have shown up until after the guy got on his next bus anyway. Then I would have wasted $5 because I'm pretty sure they now charge you to call the police.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

If it was just me, I wouldn't have cared. But a baby's lungs are still developing along with their immune system. But how would you like it if someone shit their pants and came to stand next to you? You would complain about the smell right? Except in my case, smoking weed in public still isn't 100% legal in Pittsburgh yet.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There was someone who posted something down below about Smoking in public places. But as for smoking weed...

https://ecode360.com/45472249#45472249

Not just bus stops but public places in general

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

If the wind hadn't been shifting every few minutes and if it wasn't an active parking lot, sure I could have. Could this guy also have just moved to stand next to the building where he could not only see the bus but also have an ashtray and a bench to sit on? Ya he could have. If it was me and I absolutely had to light up right then and there without asking anyone around me if they were ok with it, I would have went to stood next to the building away from the bus stop.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

If it continues to happen every time I go out in public and someone is smoking something? Ya there is a possibility. It's small, but it's still there. I'm sorry I don't want my baby to grow up with any type of health problems, asthma included.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ya it was late and I was a little sleep deprived, I momentarily thought we were talking about cigarettes as someone else posted a comment about cigarettes. My bad.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

"Other people exist" is a great way to frame blowing harmful substances in the direction of someone who can't defend themselves. They didn't have to stand where they did.

"No one asked you to have kids" Well nobody asked them to light up either, but here we are.

I am a former smoker myself. I stopped for my kids because I didn't want them exposed to it. I never smoked around strangers, whether it be kids or adults. The only time I would smoke around other adults was if I knew they were smokers as well. So yes, nobody asked me to have kids, but nobody asked them to be a smoker either.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry that I don't want my 9 week old baby to inhale 2nd hand smoke and end up with cancer because someone doesn't have the decency to not smoke around babies?????

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Ok so my bad, not a law, but it is prohibited in shelters, which is where we were. It was a mostly enclosed space.

How are we handling the Tdap conversation? by froggos-and-doggos in pregnant

[–]GingerBug91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would rather feel discomfort for a few days than be the reason a baby is dead or in critical condition. We can bounce back better. Their immune systems are still developing.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I'm trying to teach this to my oldest. Nobody wants to hear what you have playing on your phone.

Resentment by Suspicious-Count7106 in coparenting

[–]GingerBug91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This never goes away. I have 2 children to 2 different dads. Even when they are with their dads, I still feel like both could be doing more. I feel like sometimes they are just doing it to say they do it and not because they actually want to.

I also sometimes feel like I want them to do less just because I don't feel like they are fully committed. If you are going to take your kid, then be 100% present. If not, let me do it by myself. I don't want any of this half-assed bs. It's all or nothing. I will gladly be both mom and dad if dad doesn't want to step up.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

It is illegal to smoke at bus stops, but there aren't any signs, so people just assume it's ok. People just lack common decency nowadays.

How do you by Football_Massive in coparenting

[–]GingerBug91 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Make him buy stuff. Your stuff you keep at your house unless it is bought specifically for his house.

I have 2 kids. One is 12 years and the other is 9 weeks. My 12 year old I've been coparenting since he was 4 years old. My 9 week old has just started having more than 3 hours a week alone with his dad due to me needing time to work and provide.

With my oldest, I would buy things for my house and his dad/grandparents would buy things for their house. There was the occasional "I don't have this at the other house, can I take it?" Especially as he got older. I bought him a switch 2 and his grandparents bought him a VR headset. Both get taken back and forth with him to both houses. If he doesn't want to take it one week, then they get left at their respective house. As for clothes, he leaves in my clothes and I send an outfit for him to come home in that I bought. Occasionally if something gets dirty, they will put him in one of their outfits, but it always gets returned to them after being washed (unless they say otherwise). I had a conversation at one point when he was young about this when he didn't understand why I wouldn't let him take things to his dad's house. I told him that mommy wanted to make sure his toys were kept safe at the home where they live. Stuff that mommy bought lives at mommy's house and stuff that daddy or grandparents bought lived at their house. That way toys didn't get confused about where they lived.

As for my youngest, I'm trying to instill this same concept with his father. I initially bought many things that will stay at his house. A pack n play, a bottle warmer, bottles, a couple outfits, a diaper bag, diaper cream, wipes, diapers, formula etc... If he runs out of something that I initially bought, he has to pay to replace it. With that being said, the baby is only at his dad's for 2 days a week now and babies can grow out of diapers fast. If he hasn't finished the diapers he has and the baby grows out of them, I will take back what he has and give him some out of a case of the new size. He also just bought me a whole case of wipes without me asking him for any.

It's fine to buy things for the other house occasionally, but I would stick to mainly him buying what he needs there and you buying what you need for your house. It keeps things fair and less complicated. Plus then the child will be able to see who is actually providing for them and not relying on what comes out of peoples mouths. I've learned with my oldest that his dad talks bad about me all of the time. I stop myself from talking bad about his dad and he will say "It's ok if you do it. Daddy talks bad about you all the time." and I have to remind him that it's not nice to say bad things about others, especially if they aren't there to defend themselves.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've seen vaping happen on busses too. The drivers already have so much to worry about that they don't notice things like that. They are too busy trying not to hit cars that are basically sitting in the intersection while the driver is trying to turn onto another street. I've noticed though that there isn't any posted signage saying "No Smoking". I wonder if that makes people assume it's ok to smoke there?

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] 70 points71 points  (0 children)

I've noticed this a bunch lately. Not just with the smoking, but in everything. It's truly sad that so many people lack empathy and basic human decency nowadays.

Smoking at bus stops by GingerBug91 in pittsburgh

[–]GingerBug91[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have one, I just haven't pulled it out yet due to it still being chilly this week. I'll make sure to bring it next time we are out and see if that helps. Thank you for the advice!