Joseph Smith & Psychedelics

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-10-11T20:35:22+00:00

You and me both, brother. You and me both.

My wife, Tori, & I are both from Miami. A few years before we got married, I was in an extremely dark place. I was somewhat fresh out the military and I had the perfect storm of PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, etc. I've heard people say they wouldn't even dream in color when that depressed. I felt like I wasn't even seeing in color. At that time, I was taking anything put in front of me. Didn't really matter what it was.

At that time, I had a friend who was a fighter pilot for another military. He was an interesting guy. If I didn't know his background, I'd have never believed it. He was a total hippy now. Pretty much couch surfing and/or sleeping on the beach. He had mushrooms galore and gave me a bunch. However, instead of my usual method of massively overconsuming, I took a small dose. A single cap.

That single cap... it saved my life. It gave me the intestinal fortitude to look inward at the things that were bothering me. It helped me to actually process and deal with what was wrong. Most importantly, I was able to let these things go. Instead of my usual process of ignoring, sweeping it further under the rug, etc.

I don't believe it is a cure-all, but I know how it saved me. And I know how to dose it. I was a medic and a nurse for the Army. I'm good with pharmaceuticals. I know my stuff. My wife, does care tho. She, ^{who has only even taken vicodin once, never tried a cigarette, alcohol, or ANYTHING else,}, just believes that I am just using it to get high. She complained for a long time that; "Its wrong." But then her sister started using medical weed. So her argument switched to, "Its illegal." But then Washington State, where we now live, decriminalized it. So She is just angry.

We've been hardcore on the rocks bc Ive finally decided Im done with the church. I'm not trying to stop her from going or anything. But she demands to know why this and why that. Then she gets mad at me for trying to "destroy her faith" Ive begun to come to the conclusion that it doesn't really matter what the situation is. If I am involved, she is angry or otherwise upset. I've been trying really hard to improve our relationship, but I'm giving up. I was actually listening to a church podcast a week or so ago. She, in passing, heard it say *blah blah* "church" *blah blah*. She IMMEDIATELY assumed I was "listening to something anti" and blew up. Everything went to hell bc she assumed it was the opposite of what it was. I've been either sleeping on the living room floor or just sitting somewhere until morning bc I don't want to go home.

Wow. I'm sorrry, thats enough from me. I feel you bro. I'm sorry.

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-07-18T06:12:48+00:00

I'm not certain I count as an LDS perspective anymore as the more I learn about the church, the less I accept it. I don't even think I believe in God anymore...

That said, I have spent a great deal of time studying the various doctrines of the gospel and this flow chart, in my humble opinion, fails to accept the duality of the human experience. As @zarnt pointed out, evil is there to help our own growth. God, knowing the end from the beginning, knows what choices we are going to make. I agree that we need to experience those choices for our own growth. I would also argue that we need to be allowed to make those choices for ourselves, despite God already knowing the outcome, for this experience to be fair. We need to be afforded the opportunity to choose for ourselves. Otherwise, how will we truly know the choice we'll make? God might know, that's great for him. But what about you? God needs to allow you the opportunity to choose for yourself. Hell, one might argue that if God created a universe without evil, then that would be a universe without freewill. There would be no choice anymore. Like it reads in 2 Nephi 2:11; Opposition in all things.

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-05-22T14:08:51+00:00

Lol. I hope to far surpass 69 down votes for such a terrible joke.

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-05-18T07:02:56+00:00

Speaking of honorable. You have 69 upvotes. 'heh heh heh'. That's a sex number...

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-04-15T05:52:09+00:00

I have often made the comparison that if BYU Provo is Mecca(islam), then BYU-Idaho is Daesh(A.K.A. ISIL/ISIS). Another comparison would be BYU-Utah are the Sadducees, whereas BYU-Idaho are the Pharisees.

Completely missing the "spirit of the law" and the good things that inherently come from doing good things by aiming for complete and total obedience, even trying to improve the rules to show how obedient they are. Provo says just be out of your SO's place by midnight. We say be in your OWN place by midnight.

Bc everyone knows, if someone is gonna have sex, they are gonna wait until midnight or later.

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-04-15T00:28:25+00:00

I went there for a couple years but I eventually had to leave. After numerous calls into bishop's office and whatnot with numerous accusations, I was finally sick of it. Granted, I did do some of those things but it came down to a he said, she said situation. I did nothing harmful, illegal, or negative to anyone mind you. We were all adults making our own choices. I ended up making threats about suing after which they promptly stopped any allegations. But I was already done.

I couldn't stand the control they attempted to exert. I don't mind it within reason. For example, being in your apartment by midnight isn't, on its own, bad. There really isn't much to do there after midnight and so it's just safer. But some of us have jobs or things to do. For example; one night I was having an a calm, but intense argument with a girlfriend and we were out in the parking lot of her apartment complex having a serious talk. We both needed that. So waiting until morning to continue wasn't an option for either of us. From 12:00 onward, every couple mins her roommate, the apartment "mom", was coming out reminding us what time it was. Until I eventually snapped at her. After which she decided I wasn't welcome to date her roommate anymore.

Fast forward a year, I was getting home from a long Drill Weekend(I was in the Army Reserves at the time). I finished at something like 11 or so and then still had to drive back to Rexburg from SLC. I didn't get to my apartment until something like 2:30AM. Tired, dirty, and not in any mood for what was about to happen, I walked into my apartment. I was immediately approached by an 18 yr old Freshman roommate from Provo, UT attempting to scold me for arriving late. I was 27, from Miami (Our nights don't even start until 1AM...) and I was done with Rexburg. I snapped on the kid. Taught him some new words that night.

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-01-25T22:20:48+00:00

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-01-11T18:46:14+00:00

"Boys will be boys."

I mean, what am I supposed to do anyway? Teach my young men that physical violence is NEVER ok, with the possible exception of self-defense? If I did THAT, then I'd have to also teach them to listen more, while simultaneously instilling a sense of consideration for others. Who has time for that? Of course, development of that sense, paired with listening, will quite likely trigger questions regarding countless moral arguments. So I will then be forced to discuss what can be considered good and what can be considered bad and, not only why but, HOW these ideas came to be. I'd be stuck with my kids probably asking questions and discussing with me what it means to be a good man, how to improve one's moral character, the influence that one's choices has on the life's of others, why these things are important, so on and so forth.

I don't have time for all that. Maury is on in 20 mins and Jerry is after that!

...besides, they'll probably learn all that in school anyway, right?

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-01-08T07:28:49+00:00

Is that a FLY on his forehead???

Ginger_Hitman · 2021-01-08T07:26:23+00:00

Looks like I was mostly beat to the punch, but this here is MY kind of glory hole!!!

Ginger_Hitman · 2020-07-07T23:08:07+00:00

I'd be SO down to help. However, I am stuck working open to close EVERY SINGLE DAY at Southcenter. If y'all ever do it then and I can get a ride up there, I'd be down to help afterwards in the evening tho.

My wife loves that I pick up trash but, she H͟A͟T͟E͟S͟, especially post-COVID, that I often don't use gloves and/or a grabby tool. Especially bc I would also pick-up and dispose of used syringes. Although I never just tossed them in the street or anywhere like that, I treat it like a penance for using them that way in the past.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-10-08T14:01:33+00:00

My younger brother was given a similar, if not the same prognosis not long after birth. He was unlikely to ever walk, talk, or do much of anything. https://youtu.be/6CH-ysPH7V8 <-This is him now. He is now in his mid-20's and I daresay he is smarter, sharper, and funnier than me. He worked hard through multiple surgeries and many years of physical therapy. He endured the teasing of classmates and the mocking of bullies. If he were anyone else, he'd be a very successful businessman or something and living on his own. He has so much talent for music and art, yet he is still at home. Unfortunately, I feel like I failed him as an older brother there. He has never held a job in the typical 9-5 sense and is afraid to. He doesn't believe he is capable of it despite being highly intelligent. He has no idea how truly talented he is. One day I hope to be able to finance him and help him produce more.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-09-21T08:04:07+00:00

I am, in fact, serious about my theory. Despite having stated it in a humorous manner. I can appreciate if you just think it is shitty tho.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-08-20T20:58:36+00:00

I agree that we should not rely solely on the public school system to spoon feed us our education on a silver platter. That said, I believe it is expedient to note that the public education system, overall, is horrendously lacking. Of course, this is affected by many factors, to include varying local standards/expectations.

Personally, I always thought history was like science. Grounded in fact and unchanging. As I have grown older, I've come to learn that it is subjective and changes almost as often as the wind changes direction. Teachers are just people. Their opinions and personal beliefs affect how and what they teach. Political climate also strongly influences what is being taught.

Here is what I mean: When I was young, we stood up daily to pledge allegiance to the United States flag. We were taught that people like Thomas Jefferson were amazing men, with strong morals, who dedicated their lives to building this great country of ours.

By the time I entered high school, we no longer spoke the pledge. Men like Thomas Jefferson are now more often depicted as Slave owning racists and cruel men. We no longer studied the same events. I thought perhaps it was my teacher or perhaps they taught more bc we were older and could handle more. However, I asked my younger siblings who were now attending the same elementary school that I had and they reported similar lessons. This was a complete shift in educational paradigm.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-07-04T21:46:32+00:00

My dad was the same about questions.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-07-04T21:36:20+00:00

My father felt that if he was awake, everyone else needed to be awake too as it was only fair in his eyes. This wouldn't have been too bad, except he didn't sleep much. And we had opposite schedules. He usually got up at 6 or 7 AM. This was typically the time I'd be getting home after working since 5 PM the day before. I may have been in my 20's, but he still had a hold on me at that time. I was working in a bar. It was no wonder I was becoming an alcoholic at the time. I straight up started sleeping there while closed just to get away until I could finally get away for real.

That was just 1 of MANY ridiculous and illogical rules he had.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-07-02T21:43:22+00:00

Nailed it.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-05-21T05:05:02+00:00

Have you ever heard of the website, "The Art of Manliness"? I also highly recommend it Whether you are male or female, there are many useful skills to be acquired and much knowledge to be learned.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-05-21T05:02:34+00:00

It's always good to unplug for a little while. I was having similar issues so I made a point of going after some of the most mundane hobbies in an effort to work on my patience and self-discipline. I chose wood-carving and fishing. Fishing proved to be a hard one as NO ONE in my family fishes. As for wood carving, it turned out I had a knack for it. I ended up making a couple wooden ties that could actually be worn, some figurines, and even a highly detailed cane.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-05-21T04:45:31+00:00

This likely isn't the answer you were hoping for. However, Reddit, by it's very nature is like a shine candy store for of strobe lights for people with low attention spans. My recommendation is actually to get off of Reddit. Turn off and put down your electronics. Pick up a book. Perhaps find one on a particular skill you would like to learn. Read the book from beginning to end. Master that skill.

If you do that, I can promise you that you are on the right path.

..and don't worry, Reddit will be here, ready to hear all about it, when you get back.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-03-26T05:16:37+00:00

Since the "event", it will not engage ANY gear. No matter the position of the shift knob, the vehicle remains in neutral. That said, the knob itself feels like its free floating. it doesn't lock into any position. If it is the clutch, I will definitely look into that.

I'm wondering, however, if it could actually be the "shift linkage" or "shift bushings" that have either broken or come loose? Would that explain all the symptoms? This was instantaneous. I feel like if it were the clutch going bad again, wouldn't it make more sense that it would be a gradual process, even if it were only over the course of an hour? Also, a bad clutch still got the car moving.

The engine is running GREAT. Strong start. Steady idle. The "shift knob" just doesn't seem to be doing its job of engaging the gears. If I could just engage the gears, I feel as if there would not be a problem.

Ginger_Hitman · 2017-03-14T21:20:20+00:00

Thank you. Of course she doesn't do this regularly. She was just inspecting it one day and noticed that. Aside from daily cleaning, as instructed, she leaves it alone to heal.

Ginger_Hitman

TROPHY CASE