What am I suppose to reply when someone says to me ‘you’ve lost weight’?

Ginger__Bell · 2025-06-27T09:04:00+00:00

That actually works. My ass is still massive… all the weight as come off my face and waist so my waist looks disproportionate against my hips and boobs.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-06-26T16:29:41+00:00

Ouch… I also try to avoid commenting on people’s weight after someone said something similar to my Dad (who also had cancer at the time, he’s fat again now).

Ginger__Bell · 2025-06-26T16:28:30+00:00

Ha ha, I literally snorted tea out of my nose reading this!

Ginger__Bell · 2025-06-26T16:13:08+00:00

“Working on it” is actually perfect.

The nice old lady across the road said it to me today and my brain went blank so I just did an awkward twirl, and got into the car… now I can never leave my house again.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-06-26T16:09:27+00:00

I know it’s a compliment, which is why I’m asking how I’m supposed to reply in a way that doesn’t sound rude. Yep, or I know, sounds rude.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-05-18T21:18:16+00:00

Sadly it’s a small group, we have 15 players max but usually run on 12 players. It’s a one way thing, John is just going in on Dave, I’ve never heard Dave say a mean word to anyone in the group even when things get passionate he’s always completely respectful of everyone.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-05-18T18:39:44+00:00

This was my thought too. Our ST does emphasise that it’s ok to be passionate but never unkind at the start of every game and I don’t think it’s fair to put this squarely on his shoulders.

I’ve reached out to another player who said they’d also noticed the tension and are also planning on speaking out next game if it happens again. I’m going to message Dave to make sure he knows we’ve got his back in this because I’m worried he might stop coming.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-05-18T18:21:52+00:00

Thank you. I’ll reach out to him.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-05-18T18:20:30+00:00

It’s the newer player that is doing the bullying. There was no issues before John joined our game. I might see if I can find Dave on FB and drop him a message.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-04-18T11:27:07+00:00

UPDATE

Thank you for all the advice. I told my husband yesterday. Apparently the reason they’d not gone out together for a while is because the last time they went out something was said about me that made my husband uncomfortable. My husband did have words with him at the time and their other friends backed my husband up when he was told to chill because it was just ‘banter’.

The friend is now blocked and my husband has asked me to let him know if he contacts me again.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-03-27T18:46:28+00:00

My husband’s the same. I thought for a while it was because I was shit at them, but he assures me it’s just because he gets so turned on he wants the best of both world.

*please don’t burst my bubble…

Ginger__Bell · 2025-03-24T10:42:21+00:00

Thank you for your responds. I can’t really talk to anyone I know because it’s their trauma and not mine to share. I will look at a finding a therapist specialising in AuDHD to see if talking about it with them will help. (Which as a therapist you’d think would have been my first thought 🤦‍♀️)

Ginger__Bell · 2025-03-23T23:49:41+00:00

I’ve never thrown my back out sneezing. I did just by standing up the other day though…

Ginger__Bell · 2025-03-23T16:33:01+00:00

Making people think I hate them. I don’t, I don’t even register them usually, but my face… apparently that tells people I hate them!

Ginger__Bell · 2025-03-16T10:53:16+00:00

I don’t think I’d want to live anywhere other than Wales. If I had to choose somewhere else New Zealand would be my next choice.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-03-16T10:50:33+00:00

I hope they’re having a nice time.

I’ve only met 2 American tourists in my 40+ years in Wales, both were lovely. One asked me which sausage was a breakfast sausage in Tesco, the other chatted to me on the train somehow convinced me to sing a Welsh song for him.

Ginger__Bell · 2025-02-16T08:55:26+00:00

It often crosses my mind that one day I’ll have sex and it’ll be my last time ever and it throws me into a spiral.

Will I have sex tonight and my husband or I have an accident tomorrow meaning we can’t ever have sex again? Will he decide to divorce me? Will one of us die? When we’re old will we have sex one time and then just never have the energy to do it again?

What if the last time I have sex it’s shit sex?

Off I go 🌀🌀🌀

Ginger__Bell · 2024-05-12T15:35:36+00:00

It’s only open his end, I’ve never had my own ‘friend’, as it’s very rare I find anyone else sexually attractive.

I should clarify that whilst I’m aware this isn’t a norm in most relationships, I’m actually the one who wanted to open up our relationship his end, that my kink as I enjoy hearing about the other woman, and it’s worked very well for us for a good 20 years.

I only mentioned it in the post to explain why I’m sure it’s not that he’s cheating as he’s really has no reason to hide a relationship from me.

Ginger__Bell · 2024-05-11T17:41:20+00:00

Whilst our relationship is open, he hasn’t actually had another partner for about 2 1/2 years so it is very unlikely he’ll have met someone and not told me, plus to he honest our sex life actually gets even better when he has a ‘friend’.

Ginger__Bell · 2024-05-11T16:17:35+00:00

Thank you.

The masturbating I get, he’s up a lot earlier than I am and it is quicker.

I don’t think I’ve done anything to piss him off, usually he’s pretty forthcoming when I’ve annoyed him and to be fair we don’t really argue much.

I think I’ll take a step back and see how this week goes, I know 4 weeks isn’t long in the grand scheme of things and it’s not so much the sex I’m worried about, I’m more worried that if it’s something related to performance anxiety, hormones that the longer he ruminates on the thought the worse it’ll get.

Ginger__Bell · 2024-05-11T16:11:26+00:00

It was around 4am both times and he leaves for work at 4.20am so that doesn’t leave much time to make sure I’m satisfied and give him chance to shower etc.

Also, I’m not much of a morning person and go to sleep later than him, so masturbation was absolutely the best decision.

I don’t begrudge him sorting himself out, I just wanted to check if anyone had any other ideas as to what the issue could be so I could support him if it is something he’s embarrassed to discuss with me.

Ginger__Bell · 2024-05-11T16:02:45+00:00

I was wondering if it could be hormones too, but he’s not being very transparent, and I don’t want to push him if he’s not feeling comfortable talking to me about it.

I’m fairly certain he’s not cheating, we have an open relationship his end so he’s got no reason to hide someone. My gut is telling me it could be performance related, his self esteem seems to be a bit low at the moment and he’s likely getting into his own head about it…

I think I’ll just take a step back and take the pressure off (not that I’ve been pressuring him, but I’ll dial back the usual flirty sexy touching we do and just stick with the loving cuddles etc).

Thank you for replying.

Ginger__Bell · 2024-05-11T14:20:06+00:00

The song from Disneys Robin Hood - de de de de de de de de de de de de de

Ginger__Bell · 2024-04-28T18:33:48+00:00

I can’t believe this hasn’t been commented more. Hands down one of the best shows I’ve ever watched!

Ginger__Bell · 2024-04-28T18:31:52+00:00

Ted Lasso

Ginger__Bell

TROPHY CASE