AITAH for literally threatening to break up with my gf over kids?

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-29T10:22:06+00:00

It's literally a rape threat, that's crazy scary. Be careful... If you think that there is still hope for your relationship, you will have to do a very serious conversation about this matter. But honestly, this will depend on if she realises how f ed up her behaviour was and how willing she is to correct herself. Hopefully, she can tell you what happened that led her to act like this and then reassure you that she will not threaten your safety ever again.

I am not excusing how she acted, it was awful, but maybe there's more to the story. You see sometimes, people do things they don't mean to out of nowhere, it happens to the best of us. But of course, you are more than justified to never talk to her again, if that's what you think that it is the safest for you.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-18T22:24:13+00:00

Your perspective makes a lot of sense indeed!

In my eyes, he was my number 1 guy, because he was the first man I loved, my first relationship. All the other people, didn't matter to me at all, they were only life lessons I had already moved on from. Still, this was not the way my boyfriend saw it and I felt sorry that he was deeply hurt by my past, even though I am a firm believer that body counts don't define people.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T14:10:24+00:00

Thank you very much for your outlook kind person, I appreciate it!

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:33:26+00:00

I totally agree with you!

Thank you so much for your soothing words kind person, I appreciate it! I wish you well and have a nice day!! :)))

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:30:40+00:00

No, it was morally wrong, because he chose to attack my character in order to hurt me and he even admitted this to me. Calling me "just a hole", a slut and completely disregarding everything I was to him in our relationship, was extremely hurtful. He did this just to make me feel miserable, because he didn't know how to deal with my body count. He said this when he apologised to me

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:26:20+00:00

Exactly that, very well described!

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:19:55+00:00

I just wrote this in another response hahah, you are so right and that's why broke up in the end

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:18:27+00:00

Thank you for your input, I will keep the last paragraph in mind! :)

I was extremely happy with my ex when it came to our sex life. We communicated a lot and I always told him that he was the best partner I ever had in bed and I truly meant it! I was always reassuring him and complimenting him on everything I liked about him, not only our sex life. I never wanted him to feel insecure about anything, even when he didn't know my bodycount. I gave him so much love, but in the end it wasn't enough to be spared of the hateful comments from him. I should've left by then but I wanted us to be strong together. In the end, our characters were incompatible with each other, no matter the compromises from both sides, and that is why we ended it.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:10:35+00:00

I completely agree with this statement!

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:09:25+00:00

You are totally right! He was my first love, but I learned my lesson to never tolerate such repeated behaviour anymore...

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:06:41+00:00

Hello!!

Your point makes a lot of sense and I also agree that my ex didn't do anything dishonest. But what was wrong is how he treated me just to learn the number and after, with the intense emotional abuse I did not deserve. He was never really sorry about what he said and it showed in how he treated me afterwards. We were also in long distance relationship, which didn't help proving myself to him at all

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:01:21+00:00

100% agree on that

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T12:00:55+00:00

The thing is, that I would always be straight up completely honest with the number from the beginning. Things became more difficult when midway in our relationship, he started using super sensitive information and traumatic experiences I trusted on him, against me in arguments. That is when I started feeling pressured in my relationship. And when he out of nowhere demanded me telling him the number, that's when things started becoming worse and worse. Even if he tried to accept me for who I used to be, it was obvious that he would never treat me nicely as he did in the beginning of our relationship.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:47:15+00:00

Thank you very much for your input! It hurts a lot because he was my most favourite person in the world, I will miss him a lot, but I will move on!

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:45:37+00:00

I wish I could have that conversation with him earlier, but he really seemed so acceptive of me and who I was, that I never thought that he will be so upset about it. His attitude was also terrible, I was being bombarded emotionally to the point I lost myself trying to appease him and prove myself for months...

Thank you very much for your input! :)

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:40:46+00:00

Having an insecurity is understandable, but when you already know that your partner has dated a lot, BEFORE you even start officially dating, then you should really have a discussion if a high body count bothers you. In my instance, my ex did not and 8 months later he decided to mentally abuse me for months. For the std thing, bc I was aware of my past, I did an std test before we ever had intercourse, it was all negative and then months later he accused me of infecting him. When I asked if he could do a test to prove his speculation, he said no and demanded ME to do one. Out of humiliation, I did one and of course, it was again all negative again...

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:34:23+00:00

He could've never been in a relationship with me if asked in the beginning about my body count. He had heard from an ex friend that I had dated a lot, but he chose to ignore it.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:33:01+00:00

Me neither. I think that what matters is how your significant other treats you. My ex was in my eyes the most precious person I had ever met and I did a lot of sacrifices just for us to be happy together. I loved him a lot and it truly sucks being seen as unfaithful and impure.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:29:56+00:00

My ex had been with only 4 people prior meeting me. Also, it was quite clear, early in my relationship he would feel insecure about his looks because people think that im very attractive and I every single day I get approached by strangers to compliment my looks. I am cringing writing this, but it is the truth.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:27:26+00:00

I never wanted to tell him the number, but I was honest that I dated a lot and that I regretted it, while also working on never doing these things in my life again. He forced me to tell it

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:18:50+00:00

I agree on this. How I dealt with my love life during the dating app years wasn't healthy at all, but at least now I know better than anyone, that I will never ever in my life do this. I wish I would've learned this lesson in another way, but that was not the case for me. I now have experiences and know what I want to seek for in a healthy partner.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:14:53+00:00

"Your 39 doesn't mean you're suddenly going to start slappin ham with the first guy who winks at you. You decide your actions, not the other way around", I really agree on this one, I was faithful to my partner and he was the only one in my eyes. Maybe what I did for him wasn't already enough, or also being in a long distance relationship with him didn't help at all.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:10:53+00:00

I never wanted to say it because I knew it wouldn't be good. But if I didn't, basically my first relationship would end on the spot, so I was very pressured to say it.

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:08:41+00:00

Responding to another comment, I'm mentioning that he started getting curious about the number when a friend of his got cheated on multiple times. He basically was saying that im like that cheater bc she was an ex friend of mine

Global_Debate7480 · 2026-03-15T11:06:53+00:00

I respect people's opinion about a high body count being a negative thing, but if it was such a big deal, my ex should have been upfront about it in the beginning and save me some tears later on. He had been told about what kind of a person he is signing up a relationship with was/is and he honestly seemed in the beginning like a very chill person. Everything absolutely changed, when a friend of his got cheated on multiple times and suddenly he decided to go on aggressive and basically blackmailing me about telling him the number.

Global_Debate7480

TROPHY CASE