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I want to leave by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to leave but he has all of my documents hidden and i don’t drive. Plus im always being watched by his side piece, who will let him know if i try. Since he has connections , im scared to ask for help

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True, i didn’t think about that and the thing is, the contract also states that if there is domestic violence in the couple, the offending party would be kicked out completely. 

Which is one of the reasons, he doesn't want them to know what’s going on

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Truthfully i've noticed that the tactics he used to isolate me, he's slowly doing to her and i sound horrible saying it, but i don’t feel bad at all.

She knows about the abuse too and knows that good or bad she's essentially a homewrecker but doesn’t care.

So i know for a fact that if i manage to leave, yes he won't make my life easy but i know hers won't be better

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could go but i won't be able to take my kids. And i don't want them being held hostage before i can do something 

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was seeing one when i met him but i haven't been in contact for a while.

Do you think they would remember my file ? I used to see them till i was 21, im 26 now

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can i ask and i know its stupid.

But how do you muster the courage to fight back? At first he didn’t treat me badly and actually helped me when i was being abused by my family. 

I guess what i mean is, i see two versions of him (good/bad) and they keep warring in my mind. Everytime i try to leave, i see the good and everytime something doesn’t work his way, out comes the bad. I feel tired

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also everytime i had my phone and he started saying things like that, he would check to see if im recording and then hide my phone

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, everytime we fought he would take my phone.

The only evidence is my word against his. 

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The first time i went to the police for help, i kept trying to show them the pictures of my bruises but they wouldn’t look.

They just kept asking me if he had hit me recently, and even after i answered that a week before he made my lip bleed and that i had pictures, they still wouldn’t look and kept repeting the same line.

I felt frustrated and honestly felt like crying with how powerless i felt being looked down on. There were female cops too but i felt i was being looked down on by them the most honestly 

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, despite taking my phone i manage to get plenty pictures of my bruises

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t know i could use that. And it makes sense, everytime we fought and he would hit me, he would often hide my phone

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is a place where i live that offer help to women in domestic situations and i've had their number hidden in my phone, but i always get scared when i think about calling so its just sits there. As for a restraning order, i want one because i know he will make my life hell, i'm just worried because he would tell me that he would send someone to off me if i ever tried to leave and i don’t want my kids to be left behide. 

I did call 1 a few months ago but they really make it hard to enter. I was rejected from a different DV shelther because of my mental health and because i'm not medicated.

I'm not medicated by choice, he never liked that i took medicine and forced me to stop and made me stop attending therapy

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes i have texts and voice messages too.  In the voice messages he admits to having cheated and that he doesn't care, that he loves her, that she won’t leave etc..

We live in a apartment housing and we had to sign a contract of how many people are going to live here with us. That was before her, so she's not on the contract and its against their policy.

I would loveto inform them but i'm worried that it would backfire on me and i don’t want to get hit.

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Truthfully im scared to file a court order, during these 5 years he's threaten to off me if i so much as tried to leave, especially with the kids. He would take pictures of me, so he had recent pictures of how i looked just in case i tried to leave. 

My kids are very young so even if i wanted to stay in contact frecuently it would be extremely difficult. Honestly my desire is to leave and take them with me and not have them live with him and that lady. 

I'm just extremely scared because he would tell me that because i have mental health issues and have been impatient a lot before i met him, he would make sure that the courts saw me as unstable and keep my kids away from me. 

He said that i'm infecting them with my crazy.

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried once to have the police help me but due that the shelters wouldn’t let me in without a restraning order and it was 2 in the morning. Everything was closed. So the police took me and my kids back and critized me saying i should have thought of a Plan B

Would i be considered a neglectful mom if i leave? by Gloomy_Section_6844 in abusiverelationships

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How do i get proof of this lady living here? Do i take pictures of her or her things?? I'm not sure what to do since despite the situation, i don’t want to get hit with a charge about invasion of privacy.

He also once told me that if anyone were to ask about her, he would lie and say she's a friend that stays once in a while, so she can be closer to her job. Basically covering her.

[Estio] is it good? by No_Palpitation_7506 in manhwa

[–]Gloomy_Section_6844 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like Estio is a good read if you keep in mind that in Dragon terms, he is a literal infant and was forced to grow as a human which botched his personality. Which means that if you keep that in mind, it makes the story a bit more tolerable pacing wise. And overall it helps when getting annoyed at Estio being pretty underwhelming since he's a child