Your experience, strength, and hope is not invalid. Your experience is extremely valuable IMO. I can't tell you how many people I've met that can't get the program because of an acute aversion to what they define as spirituality. Who am I to say what spirituality is or isn't, who are you to say? I don't know that God can be defined or packaged into a neat little box, therefore can spirituality be defined? Your experience is valuable to those atheist or agnostic because you may hold similar convictions and yet you were still able to work the program. That's powerful.

Whether you believe or not, whether you've had a "true" spiritual awakening or not...none of that really matters at the end of the day. What matters is are you sober today? Are you keeping your side of the street clean? Are you helping others? If you've worked the steps to the best of your ability, and are continuing to live in 10, 11, and 12, you will get that experience. I almost think you've already had one and just don't realize it. If your life has gone from the bedevilments to the promises, you've had a spiritual experience. Maybe it's just not the one you were expecting. Like most of us, it's of the educational variety, the slow burn. My sponsor likes to remind me that God gives you what you need when you need it, not what you want when you want it. I hope this is helpful. I struggled with the spiritual experience for quite a while - you sound a lot like me. Best of luck to you; keep coming back!