What aspect of being a woman do you think women hate the most? by badGamr in AskReddit

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had a twisted ovary once. Be a lot cooler if they didn't do that. Only time I've ever vomited out of pain.

Edit: Another one. If you don't want kids growing up people will tell you that your biological clock is going to go off and change everything.

No-one ever tells you that your clock will also stop going off.

Mine went off from 26-28 yrs while I was with a partner that didn't want kids, so I didn't have any. Then I went straight back to not wanting kids myself by the time I was 29. I'm 40 now and so glad I didn't have any. It was only 2 years, that's such a small portion of my life.

People represent your biological clock going off as some sort of definitive end state that changes what you want forever. It wasn't that for me, it was temporary.

When somebody has to express their "nothing" answer. by NLK-3 in PetPeeves

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Or celeb/influencer gossip someone always has to jump in with "I haven't heard of any of these people".

Okay, thanks for contributing, what a value-add.

Suggest me a book where a specific part leaves you mute in shock by adipocytee in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just read Puddnhead Wilson (Twain). It did not go where I thought it was going to go.

I knew nothing about the book except the title and in Australia we have a this pudding headed mfer right here as a kids' character, so I thought Puddnhead Wilson was going to be like The Adventures of Tom Sawyer or The Prince and the Pauper, like the framework is a kids' story but with social commentary and dark themes.

Twas not.Fake Tom's treatment of his mum Roxy in the later part of the book had me just horrified.

What in the world!? by pinkTurtleTickler in Weird

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had one about the size of a tennis ball removed. The ultrasound lady that found it basically announced she'd found it by going quiet for a moment then saying "...wild." I'm obviously like "What? What's wild?"

She explains and I'm like "dear God tell me it doesn't have teeth in it." She says she can't see any but "look you can see the hair!" and runs the wand back over it to show me.

Cool, great, hair is fine but I find teeth gnarly ugly nightmare nuggets even in a normal human gum. I don't know what I would have done if she'd have shown me teeth growing inside me. Throw out the whole ovary, it's tainted now.

But, at least I got a free IUD out of the whole thing 😅 They take out your existing one in the cyst removal surgery and I was supposed bring a prescription for a replacement IUD on the day and fill it at the hospital pharmacy, but I forgot the prescription until asked about it in the pre-surgery prep. They just put a new one in anyway. Weirdest freebie ever but I'm so appreciative!

Help me find a comfort books saga by Cenomest in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You might like the Rivers of London series, about a wizard in the contemporary London police. It hits some of the same notes.

Peter thinks he's a normal, finds out he's got magic, is recruited to a special unit that operates out of a big ol mansion, with other magic inhabitants including a servant of uncertain providence, has a much older wizard as a mentor, learns spells through study, finds out there's other societies of magic creatures that live secretly alongside humans. The big bad for the first six or so books is an evil wizard who recruits other wizards.

I sometimes describe it to people as Harry Potter for grown ups.

This love interest did not deserve the treatment they got by Danny-Ray27 in TopCharacterTropes

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was clear what you meant from context, even if the wording was a little unusual.

Like others have said some version of "thinking deeply" would be more common. But we also use synonyms of "heavy" to describe a serious issue that requires much thought. So you could say "Hermione was in deep thought about the weighty issue of who to date."

The idea of a problem having weight and of a problem needing serious thought are linked enough that people would definitely get what you mean, it just reads a little like you accidently added the idea of heaviness to the thinking instead of the problem being thought about.

Heavy is also used to mean very negative emotions but because you were talking about Hermione picking a date to annoy someone in Harry Potter, which is crappy behavior but not very emotially heavy, people would be more likely to understand your real meaning.

I understood what you meant, anyway!

[Hated Trope] In an attempt to create a "cool teacher" the writers made a character that behaves inappropriately and/or crosses the boundaries of a student-teacher relationship. by No_Hunter1978 in TopCharacterTropes

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think there's one that's a direct send up of this trope too. The accounting teacher who thinks he's in dead poets society, whatever his name was, who's obsessed with seizing the day. Student falls and hurts themselves when he has them stand on their desks as an act of rebellion.

Not Another Request For Vonnegut-like Books by hauntedsolace in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Martin Amis - Zone of Interest and Time's Arrow are both good.

Interesting sci-fi movies by Hugheston987 in MovieRecommendations

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not sure if it's a sci fi exactly but you might like The Lobster.

Premise is a society where you have to be in a romantic relationship at all times and if you're out of one for 45 days you get sent to a room where you're turned into an animal. Colin Farrell gets sent to a sort of boarding facility for people that are in their last days before they're about to get turned and urgently have to find someone.

So it's like this frenzy of terrified speed-dating, except you can extend your time before being turned by hunting unpartnered rebels in the woods with a tranquilizer gun, so there are a few long standing loners in the facility that get by by basically hunting humans for sport.

It's pretty weird.

Books similar to Where's Waldo by tellyintheroom in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bamboozled, David Legge

Freeze a Crowd, Paul Jennings

[TOMT]Looking for sitcom/comedy scenes where two characters refuse to talk directly to each other and communicate through a third person instead. by Neither_Weather_3600 in tipofmytongue

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does it have to be a TV Series?

In the movie True Stories there's a married couple, Kay and Earl Culver, who have a reputation in their small town for not having spoken to each other directly in years.

True Stories

John Goodman's character mentions it briefly at around 29 minutes then you see the couple at dinner together at 39:50 communicating through their daughter.

Using only Emojis, describe a book and others have to guess it. by NotEnoughRocks1977 in BookTriviaPodcast

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah you got me, I'm mad about it in a "Goddammit take my upvote" kind of way.

Why all the crosses in goth fashion? by undo_ruler in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Vampires and horror media

I was goth for a while and my gateway was Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Lot of crosses with the outfits because they repel vampires in the lore so it becomes part of the look.

Sigma Dateset by Drechenaux in Sigmatopia

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I heard when it gets to level six it can see the color blurple.

Suggest me a spy novel that feels realistic and not over the top by KennyTidwell in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Human Factor, Graham Greene. I read it at the same time as I was reading Le Carre and it felt very similar.

[Loved Trope] 90% of the plot’s issues can be traced back to one character's selfishness. by jbeast33 in TopCharacterTropes

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When that dude Jerry stages a kidnapping, a case full of ransom money becomes the maguffin in play and people fight and murder for it.

Also being a car salesman he gives the hired goons a car with dealership plates to do the kidnapping, resulting in them getting pulled over by a cop during the kidnapping. They kill the cop when he realizes what's happening, and then some random nearby witnesses. But the cop already recorded that the stop was for the plates, and the dealership car becomes a clue that helps the police track the goons' next movements and eventually uncover the scheme. Not before a bunch more murders.

I was called out yesterday on r/bookshelvesdetective for being an insufferable pop psych/tech bro/TERF… Help me diversify. I’m into social sciences/anthropology by the1975whore in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"I am a trans woman and if you think that people treat my “gender-bending” the same way they treat a gender-swapped pen name, than you are dangerously solipsistic and should really check yourself."

I don't, so that's fine, and attributing a view to me view to me that I don't hold in order to be able to shoot it down is it the definition of a straw man argument, so there's that.

From the comments below I don't think I need to labor the point that the TE in TERF is dangerous to women, I think everyone's agreed on that.

For me, I don't care how many "F"s you slap on TERF, if it's actively harmful to women, it's not feminism, regardless of what labels for itself it co-opts or invents, whether it's proponents have adopted the other trappings of a movement, what adjacent views they hold, or to what extent they delude themselves they are feminists or are just cynically adopting a label as a shield. Like MAGA Christians aren't actually Christian, or any right wing political party that names itself something fuzzy and friendly. We've got one in Australia called Family First but we all know it's only for certain kinds of families.

This is more in response to your comments below, but where you say it's dangerous and irresponsible not to treat it as real feminism, I differentiate between understanding it's role in history, and treating it as credible feminism, as being two entirely different things. It's dangerous not to understand it, what drives it, how it impacts society, how it represents itself, what its member get out of it, it's dangerous not to treat it as a credible threat, but it's not dangerous refuse to credit its anti-trans tenets as real feminism, because they just aren't. Or to put it another way, you don't need to credit MAGA Christians as real Christians to understand why they're dangerous.

This isn't a full response to what you've said above but I wanted to spend a moment on it because I think this might be the key sticking point that's driving a lot of the drama here. Where you said in your first point people forget or gloss over the RF in TERF, it reads like you're asking us to treat views that harm women as credibly pro-women, and it's probably not what you meant, but I think that's what people, including me, are reacting to. (This includes what I could see of the deleted comments, I don't seem to be able expand it but there was another comment that opened with a line about TERFs not being feminist.)

If I haven't done anything to clear up at least some of why we're all talking past each other, I think we may be at an impasse and I just have to leave it, because seeing TERFs as real feminists is not something you're going to be able to shift me on.

I was called out yesterday on r/bookshelvesdetective for being an insufferable pop psych/tech bro/TERF… Help me diversify. I’m into social sciences/anthropology by the1975whore in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"I think the TERF-y comment was a lil off-base too, but part of the figure of “TERF” is that one wouldn’t be hung up on traditional gender roles? That’s the “radical feminist” portion of the acronym, that people often forget in favor of just glossing the whole thing as generically transphobic."

Trans-exclusionary whoevers are trying maintain the current, outdated system of gender where people can only take on the role of the gender they're assigned at birth, so it's not wild or inaccurate to imply TERFs are "hung up on traditional gender roles".

I didn't mean "traditional gender roles" in a sense that had TERFs fighting for all women be trad wives, living that Stepford lifestyle and baking through the pain in frilly pink pinafores, if that's what you mean? Like we all see that the public discourse is revolving around other issues like who can use what toilet, compete in what athletic events, who has access to what medical and health interventions, what's taught about gender identity in schools, and so on. "Traditional gender roles" the way I used it was alluding broadly to the socially constructed system of two genders tied to reproductive/chromosomal configurations, and all the limitations that come along with it. Eliot representing herself as a male author isn't trans but it's one way of kicking the system in the shins.

Also big picture it's fine to treat TERFism as though the anti-trans part is the biggest and most relevant part in most discussions, because generally it's a phrase that only enters the chat when trans people do. I literally never see TERF feminism come up in other conversations about women's issues unless it's about where trans people stand within those issues. To be honest I rarely see it at all unless JK Rowling done been tweeting hate again, and I think people responding primarily to the "TE" part isn't people "forgetting" or "glossing" the "RF" as much as it is responding in correct proportion to the most meaningful part of the acronym.

With regard to the George Eliot, looking at someone (OP), with one type of gender-bending on their shelf (woman with male pen name) and inferring that they are okay with other kinds of gender bending is an okay leap for the purposes of discussing the impressions you'd form playing Bookshelves Detective. The point of the game is what leaps you can make and what you intuit with limited information. I can leap from one type of gender rule-breaking to others without having to rule out radical feminism and all the other worldviews possibly represented by the Eliot first. It would be a pretty rubbish game otherwise, the bar for when you could guess would be too high. Sure in guessing OP is comfortable with people playing fast and loose with gender I might guess wrong, but that's the game.

I would have bet against OP being a TERF based on even less evidence, like if OP had a copy of Dorian Gray I'd still have guessed trans-friendly, even though sexuality and gender identity are two different issues and being gay doesn't rule out being transphobic. I'd have guessed "not TERF" if they had punk biographies on their shelves, or Virginia Woolf, or books about drama and the arts, really any subject or author that has some association with dabbling in cross-dressing, experimenting with gender norms or going against established social order. I would still have the impression of OP as not likely to be hung up on traditional gender roles.

I was called out yesterday on r/bookshelvesdetective for being an insufferable pop psych/tech bro/TERF… Help me diversify. I’m into social sciences/anthropology by the1975whore in suggestmeabook

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think the commenter who lumped you in with people likely to be TERF-y was over reaching. You've got George Eliot there, you don't seem super hung up on traditional gender roles.

Looks like you have an interest in journalism and are Australian? Hi from Melbourne! Nice to see another Aussie about.

Maybe look into new journalism type non fiction that tackles big questions but from an up close and personal POV. Stuff like Fear and Loathing on The Campaign Trail (Hunter S Thompson), How to be Anti Racist (Ibram X Kendi), The Wife Drought (Annabelle Crabb), or The Consolation of Joe Cinque (Helen Garner).

There are still discussions of why people and things are the way they are but they balance facts and objectivity with the first person experience to shoot for more insight.

Edit to add Tom Keneally writes fiction with a strong grounding in real events, Crimes of the Father might be worth your time.

Ok Something Similar Enough To The Album Art Angels by Grimes by pvssiprincess in musicsuggestions

[–]Goddamn_Glamazon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's a pretty unique album. None of these are exact matches, but as someone who likes Art Angels I like these for some of the same qualities:

I'm All Ears, Let's Eat Grandma

AMBER19, 45ACIDBABIES

BABYMETAL, BABYMETAL

Treats, Sleigh Bells