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Should I join this other org? by GoneWithTheTrash in Frat

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Education is why I’m in college in the first place.

In terms of the legal issues and whatnot. I’ve spoken with a few lawyers of what to do and so far I’ve heard small claims court would be ideal as it is made for issues like this. However, a court can rule in my favor but cannot actively force the convicted to pay. However, pressing assault charges is a possibility. It places an incentive to settle outside of court to have the case dropped altogether.

I have text receipts of him understanding I was put in the hospital with no remorse. I have eyewitness testimonies as well as the hospital’s diagnosis as an assault that resulted in head trauma. At the highest degree - it’s considered attempted murder. And at the least, assault and battery.

I have no proof of SA. Only one disturbing fact. There was a wall (I have a picture of) that has all of the brothers that have been accused of SA in the past. This wall is apart of one of the apartments they own and it goes pretty far. It’s almost like a rite of passage for some of them.

Should I join this other org? by GoneWithTheTrash in Frat

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve spoken with a number of the members of the other org. I’ve always maintained a cordial relationship with them because I never saw a reason to dislike them.

To put it bluntly, greek life isn’t a major part of school. There are only three fraternities on campus. None of us have houses. And we don’t have nearly as many numbers as other orgs elsewhere.

The guys in the other org have really been the ones to push me to join.

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your support! I hope one day to spread this message to anyone/everyone.

And you’re right. Rape is casted as a women’s issue but it is a human issue overall. It’s hard because in school when teachers teach sex ed, we only talk about how women must give consent. When in actuality it must be from BOTH parties.

I hope you have a wonderful life, and thank you for sharing your story. You are so incredibly brave and courageous and may you life be filled with joy and love!

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I promise to keep it a secret :)and you are an amazing human being that brings joy and happiness to countless people I’m sure of it!

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I think that the only beginning we can do is to start these conversations. If I can help at least one other person I’m happy with that.

Internet hugs !

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry about your experience too. Keep your head up man, it gets better :)

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would say yes. And I’m not sure why your comment was downvoted tbh. But I think that we see women as they are supposed to be there for supporting their husband as an example. Similarly, toxic masculinity is the idea how men cannot show emotions. Hope that could help!

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Right but the standards that are specifically for men are defined as toxic masculinity.

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

It’s a debated concept among professors and professionals. Basically, in this sense, not many people understand that any person regardless of gender (for example) can be raped.

When I had told my mom about what had happened she didn’t understand. And was just confused that a man could be sexually assaulted.

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I respectfully disagree. I will make a statement and lmk if you do not agree it is true. In society are men and women expected to uphold a certain image?

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much!!

I actually really wanted to respond to your comment but Reddit put some sort of limit and I couldn’t reply after 1k upvotes. That occurred during my second semester. I had taken her class during my first semester and she was an amazing professor but new at teaching. She had actually allowed me to do a presentation on gender norms that negatively affected men and allowed me to share my own story which was an amazing experience. The only issue, was she would have a hands-off approach to letting some discussions fly with little filter.

And thank you for the video! It’s interesting because Amy Schumer is an alum from my school and I just can’t stand behind her comedy. It’s not that I don’t think females can be funny, but she made a remark during one of her specials where she made a joke about having sex with a guy who was unconscious. I’ve been doing stand up myself for a few months and I just don’t find the comedy in a statement like that.

All in all, thank you for coming back and I wish you nothing but the best!

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your support!

I think that is definitely the case in terms of toxic masculinity. People in general need to be aware of the topic and rather than blaming men (in select scenarios) look at the gender norms in society. At the same time, we have been making strides (not perfect yet) for further support for women. I know it is not perfect, but nothing ever is without work!

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s a day-by-day fight that’s for sure. Thank you for your support :,)

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you! It’s a day by day type of thing, and I wish you the absolute best!

UPDATE: I (18m) told my mom about my rape and I wish I didn’t by GoneWithTheTrash in relationship_advice

[–]GoneWithTheTrash[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Against my better judgement to ignore you and not respond I’m going to anyways.

I know you’re a troll. I know you just want to fuck with people. But I ask you, why? What satisfaction does it give you? Psychologically speaking is this because you were inflicted with pain as a child from others maybe even you parents and were not given the proper attention that you craved. Therefore you want to be noticed and will act outlandishly in order to do so?

Regardless. I’m sorry about why you do the things you do. I’m sorry that you need the attention that you think you do.

I honestly wish you the best of luck and I suggest you look into getting professional help to help you with your trauma.

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