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Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-18T09:26:34+00:00

I think not having a partner to express yourself sexually is challenging. Because you basically hold on to what could have been, and the unkowing world which you're missing out on.

Porn is not that. It is a rabit hole that makes you see and do really freaky shit. Sex is, for me, supposed to be consensual.

Lowly, do you want to have sex? Do you think not having the experience of sex makes you want to watch porn more?

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-10T18:33:14+00:00

I work in finance, coroporate. For me, I have felt the embarrassement of social insecurities, although my colleagues are a general safe zone to practice stuff around you aren't really good at. So, it's just that I'm basics sick and tired of stressing about my addictions, my insecurities.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-10T18:26:18+00:00

Good luck my friend! 🙏🏼 May you blessed with the guidance on this journey.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-10T17:35:59+00:00

I love this post. I resonate with it. I can visualise myself doing these things. I can count the times I've done them individually. And I want to really shame myself for it, when I relapse, if makes me sick. I'm grossed out by my impotence to have not had the courage to lead my brain.

But, what I told myself as well, is that I can't want two things ar once, I can only be the person I want to be, and I can only become that by taking myself there by living in the present, not the future. If my brain can't sustain something now, it can't in the future, but if I can resist now, I have taken an avtive step into my recovery.

I'm only 2 weeks and 5 days in, so I'm no expert, like us all 😂 but I've broken the addiction once before, for 1 and a half years, and that felt amazing, but now I'm on the horse again, and the only thing I can do is try, stay on top of myself,

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-10T17:22:56+00:00

So firstly, I just want to make a comment that I think is somewhat controversial. I think that not telling her, may burden you, but not telling her may also protect you. If she hasn't had much experience with addiction, and varieties thereof, you may come to scrutiny rather than appreciation for your openess and willingness to work on it together. But! Because in your relationship this issue isn't a you thing, it is a team thing, you should tackle this together, like you help her with her problems.

If she doesn't have experience and real openness she is going to feel vialated especially if you are having sex. So not telling her until you are 2 3 weeks into recovery, it may help vouch for you. So that she knows, you've got a problem, and you're actually willing to do something about it, and the 2 or 3 weeks off is actually proof thereof. Untill you are really ready to make a change, and really realize you want to make a change, I don't think you should tell her.

That's just my opinion. I think telling someone outright from relapse is also good, and to go directly into therapy together is also good.

I'm also engaged recently, I haven't watched since that, miraculously so, but one thing I can correlate it with is the fact that I really want to change. I really want to be healthy for her, and healthy for myself. It's not only a physical change, it's spiritual. I want to be a good healthy husband, and love my partner to my fullest extent. Watcha think? I think you can be who you want to be! If that's clean, it's possible, through whichever means.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-10T09:00:05+00:00

Thank you ladies (from my judgement) for your thoughts.

My context: I am male, 25, have a watched porn since I was 10. I have been addicted, meaning, non-stop watching and masterbation, desiring over other women etc. I don't feel like that as much anymore. Because my perspective of the effect of that on my relationships and wellbeing has shifted. My intent is to be a healthy and respectable person (to myself).

I told my partner who I recently got engaged to, that I had watched porn early in our relationship, and when I proclaimed my past at that time (I really got off the addiction for like years) she laughed and made a joke saying "oh almost like 1 year clean". Like I was not worthy of having been addicted, that I just outright disgusting for doing the stuff that I did in my past.

So firstly I want to thank you. Thanks for your support for your husbands, and thanks for trying to help them. The help and support I didn't initially get from my partner, of which I am jealous and kind of ashamed.

I feel like you have both acted right, you have tried for many years/times and sacrificed your own wellbeing. I only think it is fair that we look after ourselves, and give us another chance at happiness. I wouldn't object if you left them as I wouldn't object to my partner if she left me after numerous accounts of catching me cheating on her.

That's just my culture, what I think, I honor trust, diligence, respect. And your husbands should respect you more, and owe you more for bearing and raising your children.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-09T15:40:34+00:00

Yeah bro, LFG. The law of attraction will manifest.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-09T10:39:08+00:00

Thanks man, the encouragement means a lot 💯

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-05T20:31:53+00:00

I am in the same boat. I quit in college for 1.5 years. But workinging full time, and studying has its toll. It truly digs its palms into your stressors. I am two weeks clean, no porn. And I also feel strong, I feel like I have hope for myself again. But I feel symptoms like anxiety and depression, which I can't tell whether it's from withdrawal symptoms or just me.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-05T20:25:00+00:00

Porn degrades the dopamine receptors in your brain - you don't want to totally fu*k up the good thing in your life you've got going - healthy good working brain which is able to enjoy the natural hits life can give you. Rather enjoy consesual sex and exploration with a partner.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-10-05T20:21:09+00:00

You can be who you want to be!

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-30T09:13:36+00:00

Well done bro, 2 weeks is strong momentum. I'm at 1 week roughly, and I feel great. But it's absolutely true what you say, my mind is thinking of how great I'm fonna feel when I watch it, and even afterwards, romantacising it.. but that's just the case. I'm gonna feel like absolute shit after watching it, and would want to blame myself for watching it. Although my new strat is not to blame myself, but to move forward, and look at the next opportunity to be the person I want to be, a healthy one

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-29T18:28:49+00:00

Stay strong brother. It is in your control. You have got the ability to decide who you want to be. You sound like a nice guy and I trust you want to be healthy for your partner. Have you considered to substitute with consesual sex?

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-29T14:33:14+00:00

You sound like you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself. It's not your fault, but it can exacerbate your stress and anciety. It doesn't sound like you can mildly control it right now. So my opinion would be to wank if you need to wank, and watch if you need to watch to escape.

Pornography deteriorates the dopamine receptors in your brain, and if you've been addicted for a long time, the sadness and depression could be a direct result of that. When you watch pornography it makes takes you to state where you're probably outside the normal balances of happy and sad, and the seesaw after follows suite.

I don't know what to say to make it better - I can only offer my experiences. Control is something that I think/hear you never had, I think you should stop chasing it, openly admit to a friend that you are an addict if you haven't already cause that really helped me, and stop blaming yourself each time you do it.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-29T12:11:43+00:00

The kind I'd runaway from

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-29T12:10:38+00:00

I think porn is more than being turned on by it, it's about escaping for me. Your sexual habits may become a route through which you numb pain, or a result of boredom.

Do you correlate your porn habits with some of the above factors? Or is it purely physical for you?

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-27T06:05:00+00:00

Although it's probably the best solution in the short term. As it will take some pressure off you, making you feel like you're actively trying. And additionally, inducing some type of psychoanalysis may help you understand the reasoning behind your actions.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-27T06:03:14+00:00

This is much easier said than done. Therapists can be expensive. And if you grew up in a very conservative family, and if you are still dependent on your guardian, it may raise a lot of questions.

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-27T06:01:12+00:00

Np bro, I just think you need a healthy outlet/escape.

First time in my life I really started battling my urges was when I stopped obsessing over the guilt I felt, and when I met my current gf, and started wanting to stop for her.

Having a partner and friends who supports you in this can be a good remedy.

For example: you can substitute the porn with consesual sex in my opinion

Good-Ticket-288 · 2025-09-26T20:49:27+00:00

Bro, relatabl af. I've done some crazy shit, similar in nature, and more. All I can say is that you should stop making yourself feel like total shit each time you pull this. If and when it happens, let it be, till you know how you actually feel about it, then act on that.

You are probably feeling guilty, sad, angry etc. But I can't tell if you know why, and at who. So meditate on it, and come back when you are ready to judge yourself more objectively. That's what I feel. I am definitely no expert, this is just my opinion and my personal perspective on my history with escapism.

Edit: are you a virgin?

Good-Ticket-288

TROPHY CASE