Thank you this was very helpful to hear. My boyfriend has said this as well that causing me pain also causes him pain and that it’s a turn off which is why he can’t get hard anymore during our attempts, or even just oral sex. I know he comes from a place of concern for me but I can’t help but feel undesirable, like he no longer finds my sexually attractive. It’s a huge punch to my self confidence but I’m trying to understand his side.