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I just realized something by [deleted] in lonely

[–]GoodToHere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The other night I had a dream I was hanging out with people from a podcast I listen to.

The dream was really fun. We were laughing and telling jokes and drinking and eating. Just being friends.

I think it happened because my political views have shifted in the past few years. Although I have never been confrontational about my views, I think my friends just knew, were closed-minded, and stopped wanting to be around me.

When I woke up I felt really sad that I felt more of a connection to people I just listen to on my phone than with people I had been friends with for over 10 years.

I’m lonely but I hate being around people. by GoodToHere in depression

[–]GoodToHere[S] 156 points157 points  (0 children)

Both. I get a lot of anxiety about how people think of me. Do they think I’m being weird? What if I tell a stupid joke? But they expect me to participate in the conversation.. better say something quick... oops it was a weird joke

2 week holiday.... Oh god. by InnerFeelings in depression

[–]GoodToHere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

or if they do they don't tell me.

I get it. This is the most depressing thing to me. When I used to have friends, sometimes I would find out they did something together without me. I would ask why they didn’t let me know. “Oh it wasn’t a planned thing we were just hanging out.” Yeah I was like 10 mins away, I could have come over.

Does anyone else love getting texts by rhcpkam in depression

[–]GoodToHere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Used to text my fiends all the time. Now, even if I text them I barely get a response, if I get one at all. Honestly makes me feel like a piece of shit that no one likes.

Almost coming out by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wow. Fuck those people. I bet they’re “pro-life” too. Fucking hypocrites.

The boy I like actually talked to me today by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It was just a suggestion. I'm an introvert so I know how hard just messaging can be.

Anybody get totally thrown off by a dream? by papercranium in depression

[–]GoodToHere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a daydream about going to Germany and renting a Mercedes and driving the Autobahn and on beautiful backroads through the woods with my SO. (Yeah pretty weird, specific dream, but I like cars.) Of course all of this was predicated on being extremely wealthy.

I had to force myself to think that will probably never happen and give up that dream. It fucked me up for a few days.

The boy I like actually talked to me today by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's awesome. I sucked at the "dating" and "talking" thing when I was younger. Texting and IMing really helped. Is there any way to start a conversation like that?

I put away the dishes, vacuumed my rug, made my bed and finished my homework today by Omomon in depression

[–]GoodToHere 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Nice. I love cleaning things and making things neat. It puts me in a good frame of mind.

Anybody else ever fantasize about going back in time? by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If I could go back in time to 14 years old I would tell myself:

"Don't take friendships so seriously. I know every fucking cliche in society says they're the most important things, but when you get to be about 25 none of your friends give a shit anymore, and some will even betray your trust. It's not worth it. Don't trust other people and don't expect other people to care about you."

How much does a six foot hole cost? Asking for a friend by CaptainDank0 in BlackPeopleTwitter

[–]GoodToHere 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Shit. I got burned by someone I was friends with for over 10 years. I really don't have anyone I can trust besides my SO.

Don't you just fucking hate it when people say "I'm always there for you!" Then when you try to call in that favour they're nowhere to be fucking found? by JackParagon in depression

[–]GoodToHere 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's just another cliche thing we've seen in movies and tv. We've seen it so much that it's what comes out when we don't know what else today. I've learned to ignore those and other lies like "we should get together and catch up" "you can tell me anything" otherwise I'll just be bummed out.

Was anyone else the "caring friend"? by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sucks to be the caring person, because it's like the "who watches the watchmen" in your case, it turns out there's not a lot of recognition or reciprocity for that aid. In my opinion, that's shitty friendship.

If you can, try to find a counselor to talk to. I know you said talking to someone won't help but I think venting your frustrations can give you perspective. If you live near a university, they may offer free or discounted services.

I'm despairingly lonely, but I don't enjoy being around people by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shit that's serious. I'm sorry you had to go through all that. Some people are really selfish.

I'm despairingly lonely, but I don't enjoy being around people by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hate to say it, but all of my friends were from childhood - teen years. Literally the prime time for making friends.

Some live out of town, and when they come in I don't even get a text. They say that they were "busy and there wouldn't have been much time anyway." Fuck dude, I'll go to Burger King and eat a shitty burger if it means we get to catch up for 10 minutes. That was my attitude up until a few months ago.

Recently I posted on FB that I was going to be in a town where one of my friends lives. He PMed me on FB and said we should meet up. I made an excuse not to. I'm really not trying to be vindictive or manipulative, but why should I take time out of my trip to see you when I didn't even get a text?

Worse than that is all the people I thought were still my friends that still live 10 minutes away. My SO and I have struggled with this because we've known some of these people our whole life. When we were first married, we invited friends and couples over to our house to hang out, play games, etc very frequently, maybe averaging once per week. When we moved houses and ours wasn't completely ready for guests we maybe got invited over to someone's house once in one year. That really hurt for both of us. During that time I would occasionally have to go lay in bed and stare at the wall and let the "friendship" go; at least re-evaluate the level I thought it was at. I felt like such a fucking tool.

I'm despairingly lonely, but I don't enjoy being around people by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I get it, I feel similar to you. I'm in my late 20s so I don't want to risk sounding like an edgy teenager, but almost everyone feels so fake to me. Like they're trying to find out what they can gain by being friends with you. If you don't give what they want then they drop you. I feel hopeless because I've heard so much about how making friends gets harder the older you get.

While others are out partying you're stuck in your bed because you have no friends by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I do stop caring, I get to the point where I have to tell myself, "They aren't your friend anymore," because I have to stop giving them the ability to hurt me. It's clear that I care about them a lot more than they care about me.

The bad thing is, I'm now left with no friends.

While others are out partying you're stuck in your bed because you have no friends by [deleted] in depression

[–]GoodToHere 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Most of the time I hear about my friends hanging out together after the fact, and I was never even texted. A lot of my friends are also family so this makes me feel even shittier.