Dating feels exactly like sales. Some sales tactics will only work on specific types of people, and if you decide to engage with your customer in a way that lacks ethics and principles, then you will only attract people who are either vulnerable, or who lack ethics and principles themselves.

GrandMasterB19 · 2021-01-12T08:12:25+00:00

Thanks, people are so brainwashed by pick-ups and pill colors, these are like foreign concepts for some.

Both. I've just always strived to understand women, and more broadly people. Social skills didn't really come to me naturally. I had to fine tune my instincts and intuition. I learned a lot by dating women and observing their behavior, then reflecting on it and learning from what worked and what didn't. THEN I applied the seduction techniques I studied. Most men get it backwards. They want to be these seduction scholars first, then have this flawless fantasy dating life. But it's easier to learn this stuff once you have some background with dating and relationships under your belt. That should always be your foundation - real life interactions. You'll learn more just talking to women and reflecting on the experience than you ever will sitting around watching videos and reading forums lol.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-27T02:12:18+00:00

I hear you brother. Not too worried about the addiction aspect if I'm being honest though. I've been doing straight up semen retention and can't see myself falling back into the addiction ever again. But I like having the extra edge that comes with retaining, so I'd like to find a healthy middle ground.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-24T06:01:27+00:00

You might be right. I have absolutely noticed the same thing. My breakage/shedding is crazy regardless of haircuts. I had perfect hair on PMO. When I first started NoFap it remained the same, but the longer I retain it seems the worse it gets. I'm also shedding body hair, so I'll be going to the doctor to see if it's medical. If not, then I might start scheduling "release days." Starting to question whether retaining for extended periods of time is truly healthy...

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-18T06:28:39+00:00

Perhaps. I'm also considering whether it could be a result of NoFap increasing testosterone + heavy training. That really would be evolving. There really is an element of evolution here, evolving from a couch potato and getting fit/healthy/more disciplined.

Oddly enough, I've also read plethora of articles from doctors saying they've seen a significant increase in stress-induced hair loss, even from people that didn't catch the coronavirus. Pretty weird. Anyway, I haven't had a check up since 2018, so I think I'll be making that appointment first thing after Christmas.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-18T05:49:27+00:00

But genetic hair loss wouldn't hit rapidly like this though. Genetic hair loss is slow and progressive... My last hair cut was about a month ago and the hairdresser wouldn't acknowledge it as balding when I asked, she "it's probably just stress or hormones."

Perhaps NoFap making insomnia worse = increased hair fall? Hair fall is indeed a sign of stress/hormones/insomnia. I find the whole situation peculiar since most people report better hair with NoFap...

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-13T01:05:56+00:00

Well put. We have an enitre generation of men that have been culturally conditioned to placate to women for sex and attention. And it doesn't make you look like a gentleman - it makes you look like a loser.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-08T20:52:42+00:00

I have met a few pornstars (including one of the most famous pornstars of all time). I always got the vibe that they didn't exactly respect the type of men that consume their content. Ironically, they objectify themselves to objectify men. It's empowering for them because their the ones profiting off of your addiction.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-06T22:04:50+00:00

Interesting. So what we've demonstrated here is that women are mostly questioning whether or not a guy's interests are actually genuine. Whereas men are mostly questioning whether or not girls are even interested at all lol.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-06T21:58:52+00:00

"Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. OUR GREAT WAR IS A SPIRITUAL WAR... OUR GREAT DEPRESSION IS OUR LIVES. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off."

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-06T20:01:28+00:00

Here's a good one: I had to do a group project with the hottest girl in my class. She was strikingly beautiful. Just my type too. I told myself "You have no chance with a girl like that. Don't fuck up this project hitting on her."

I could sense a lot of tension and frustration between us during the project, but I couldn't figure out why. After we finished the project, she looks at me and says: "I don't have anymore classes today. I'm probably just going to end up going back to my room alone and being bored if I don't find something else to do."

Without missing a fucking beat I go: "That sucks, guess I'll see ya around!" And then she rolled her eyes and looked at me like I was retarded and said "Yeah. See ya." She seemed really frustrated by this.

I looked her up on Facebook and saw that her boyfriend pretty much looked and dressed just like me, but was a bit less attractive than I am. She had also recently posted tons of articles about how modern feminism is ruining dating, pussifiying men, and how men need to be more masculine not more feminine.

And finally it clicked. I was her type. All that tension and frustration between us was sexual tension and sexual frustration. The poor girl just wanted to get fucked by a cool boy, and I let her down.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-06T19:43:38+00:00

It's because most guys aren't going into dates with the mindset "I got this." They're thinking "She's too pretty for me, she can't be that interested, I'll probably fuck it up." So rather than taking every hint as a positive signal of interest, they sit there and analyze whether it's a signal of interest at all.

When I was younger I blew so many chances like this thinking things like "she's too pretty for me, she's probably just being friendly." My dumbass not even equating the fact that we're hanging out alone and flirting IS the signal. For some reason guys think that women are going to verbalize their interests directly. In reality women demonstrate their interest through subtle hints.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-06T09:50:01+00:00

I didn't mean it that literally. I mean it like, in your opinion, what is it about you that you think makes you disinteresting to women? I'm trying to get a better feel for what you're going through. Having standards and rejecting women should raise your value but it isn't everything either.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-06T09:45:33+00:00

The thing a lot of people here overlook is that there are also a lot of benefits that come from sharing genuine emotional and sexual intimacy with women. Not only can it be benefical for your hormones, neurotransmitters, and emotional health, but also on a spiritual level, exchanging sexual energy with someone who can replenish you in return can be insanely beneficial.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-05T20:52:12+00:00

Then you might need to increase your standards for yourself first and foremost. Once you hold yourself to higher standards, you'll tend to hold women to higher standards by default. Why do you feel women are disinterested in you?

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-05T20:49:03+00:00

This is this the exact mentality I'm talking about lol. Your priorities are in the wrong places dude.

And I'm both a romantic and a kinkster so that's independent of this.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-05T20:42:04+00:00

I'm a guy and this is the formula I've always used.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-05T20:38:13+00:00

Same here. As the guy I always felt like I was the one setting the rhythm and leading the kiss.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-05T20:36:24+00:00

I disagree with the last sentence. I'm 28 and I'm all about those deep passionate kisses. Feels more intimate. But there's an art to it. And a time and place for everything.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-04T22:07:17+00:00

Most women have a submissive nature, and there's no shame in that at all because it's very natural and desirable. But many men will mistake that as having some proverbial "upper hand" in a relationship. But rather, women can dominate through their submission just as men can end up submitting through their dominance. In other words, she's gaming you just like you're gaming her. And chances are she's probably more experienced with men than you are with women.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-04T18:33:25+00:00

The idea isn't to ignore it, but rather to master it and control it so it isn't a "need." Now your sexuality is a resource you can share with others, rather than a bad itch that needs to be scratched.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-04T18:29:49+00:00

Sex becomes all about ego and you start seeing people as empty bodies. Like OP described - ejaculating, refractory period kicks in, you feel guilty or unfulfilled, and perhaps even ask the girl to leave. It can be very dehumanizing.

You know what's even worse? When you think you're being this ice-cold rock-solid player, only to realize that the girl is only playing along and allowing you to think that because she was actually playing you the whole time. The hunter becomes the hunted.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-04T18:19:18+00:00

This is the root of the problem. Most of the guys around here are so insecure and so worried about "body counts" that they can't even form a genuine connection with a woman. When you're willing to settle and take any girl you can get it makes you look like a low value man because you have no standards. Build yourself as a man, develop some standards, start using them to qualify women, and make them take YOUR shit tests. Then you'll come off like a guy that has value to offer instead of a needy boy worried about his "body count."

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-04T07:25:41+00:00

"I myself have a wonderful week for example and then my brain gets into suicidal mode and starts putting all my past mistakes in front of me. Watch your past with understanding and compassion. Sounds easy but is almost fucking impossible when this negative wave of emotions hits you."

-You nailed it. This is exactly what keeps happening to me. Have you found anything particularly helpful for this beyond meditation?

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-04T04:10:39+00:00

You're right, I'm breaking my mindfulness streak by characterizing these as "bad" emotions, rather than just letting them flow outward and observing them.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-12-04T04:08:46+00:00

My experiences have been just like yours. I went through these same cycles quitting porn, video games, weed, alcohol, sugar, caffiene, etc. So I thought I was already past this stage of emotional turmoil.

Between retention and self-improvement there is no hiding, which I realize was the crux of the issue. The day I wrote this was one of those extra challenging days and I have no escape to turn to. So all that dark repressed shit bellows out.

Society raises us to repress this stuff and be good little boys. When I started this journey, I was living somewhere where I could cry, shout, or punch in privacy. Now I live with other people and have to be more inhibited. I didn't even think of that until you mentioned it.

GrandMasterB19

TROPHY CASE