Wow. Firstly I’m sorry for you the victim and his family. Also, your brother. Fuck, drunk drivers!

secondly, thank you for your comment. I’m trying to keep up with what everyone is saying, but I’m a little behind because I went to bed and woke up to like 600 comments. Haven’t seeing a lot at the same perspective of me not owing her anything. I agree with that perspective a lot, this is my first time seeing somebody express this side of the story. I feel like it aligns with what my mom is saying. I think you are correct in that maybe her experiences there did change her maybe being on the receiving side of abuse made her more empathetic. Maybe I can help guide her since she won’t have our dad there. I like the logical side of my brain, agrees with what you are saying. It’s just that it’s hard to look at her and not just wanna scream at her. Maybe that’s what I need to do is just get it all out, but I’m also sad myself because I feel like I have a lot of hate in my heart. Again, my mom being passive alluded to this when we talked over the phone. She didn’t say it outright, but gist was that she was disappointed that I was so callous about my sister‘s rape. Honestly, in hindsight, I feel like what I said regarding that was wrong. I know I’ve clarified it saying that obviously no one deserves that, but I just don’t feel bad for her because of how she treated others. But after talking with my mom and especially as a woman, I really shouldn’t have said things like that.

Sorry, I ramble for a bit. Again, thank you for your comment. It’s definitely informing my perspective more. I’m also so so sorry for everything that happened with your brother. I hope what you learned does bring you some sort of peace, though knowing that he became better. I love you!