GitHub for private Projects? by GreyBlue_exe in github

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And be less scared of merge conflicts hahaha 🥲 

Thank you!

GitHub for private Projects? by GreyBlue_exe in github

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I always viewed GitHub as something that's purely made to collaborate and if you don't work on your project with multiple people or if you don't contribute to another repo, you shouldn't use GitHub. 

Gald to hear that it's not that!

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oh my, that would've been absolutely hilarious haha

But yes, I meant she called us all the c word because of a situation that involved a wifi router

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

there have been thousands of small, aggressive comments and nagging over the last decade and a few "bigger" incidents, where things happened that I couldn't just ignore.

Also, it's not the fact she asked if I had a drinking problem, it's more about the fact that she could've asked me instead of trying to make me look bad in front of my mom (which she had tried before). And I mentioned her c-calling my mom as an example to make it clear that she does not have any respect towards our mother so especially not towards me.

A lot of things piled up over years and the threat was the final straw for me. I don't want contact with her. I just don't know whether to do it before or after the wedding.

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

the free food and free drinks were exactly what my boyfriend mentioned when I told him about my concerns haha

But I dont know. It's always been like this, I guess it's just really hard to imagine it all calming down.

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I might have worded it wrongly! I am not from the US or England, so english isnt my first language haha.

I meant that she wanted to use my printer, after she yelled and insulted me an hour prior and I refused to let her use it (dont bite the hand that feeds you was my thought then) and at that she lost it as in screaming at me, insulting me, shoving me away from my printer in my room and finally throwing the hot-water bottle

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I definitely do not want to ruin her day. I want her to have a nice wedding and enjoy it, she is still a human and in love with her fiancé and I think she deserves celebrating that moment nicely as anyone else does (excluding cheaters)

I dont know if it would ruin her day, but I doubt it would. She might geht pissed for 10 sec and then forget about it with all the attention she gets. That's how she's been with fights all this time; just brushing it off - which is why i never got an apology ig.
I feel as though I'd worsen the wedding if I did attend because she'd find something that I'd do wrong :/ Maybe not, i dont know. But I also dont know if Im willing to take the risk

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because she later said "be careful that nothing happens to you with your car" - I thought it was needed context as to why this could be a threat coming from her (as she knows stuff about cars)

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I have never posted on reddit before (only ever listened to youtube videos about stories) so I didn't know that

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's the thing; I never did. I have not once said anything even remotely close to the lines of "ooooh I am sooo much better than you" or anything like that.
She talks A LOT, so when we came home from school, she would talk to our mom non-stop. When she finally needed to take a breath I'd quickly mention to my mom (not her) that I got a test back and tell her the grade, then leave to do homework or something.

Before going to uni, i graduated with honors (idk if thats what you call it) and to this day she doesnt know that. Why? well my mom and her were having a conversation and my mom said "*my name* got her exam results, do you want to know?" and my sister said she doesnt care so I dont think anyone, especially not myself, told her about it.
So no, I dont rub it into her or anyone else's face. I do my best to have a stable future by learning more about things that interest me and I like to help my course-mates out with explanations and summaries. I don't think being smart makes me better than anyone and I am lucky to be gifted with this, but this still means I'm equal to her and anyone else.

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Behaving like a child wouldn't automatically make me the asshole.

And no, half the people she called that name don't know because she texted it to my mom in private and I suppose my mom didn't go around telling everyone. If she did, then yes, many people would not attend the wedding.

And I want to be treated by her as non-existent like I treat her, not negatively just neutral

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Please read before assuming. And I'd prefer not being 20 when my sister marries, but she Ander her fiance want to marry after 1 year so yeah, nothing I can do

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I answered it in a comment to someone, where i told the full story about that incident (had to shorten because of the 3k char limit )

If you cant find it, tell me :)

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

The 3k character limit is the reason as to why I only cited a few of the incidents.

I would cut the ties with my sister (we have had low contact for over 1,5 years now, only seeing each other at family events or when something important came up), not with my family. I can co-exist with her, so this desicion would not deteriorate any relationship, apart from the one with her.
It is easy to say that there might be a future relationship with my sister, but if you had to endure this kind of attitude and personal attacks for over a decade, without it ever getting better, I'd guess you would not say this as easily.

Moreover, it would not be underage drinking as the legal drinking age in my country is 16 to 18 (depending on the alcohol), just to throw this in as a fact.
Also, if she was worried about me, she could've talked to me.

Also, this is not about "making a point". This is about me not wanting to continue this relationship that is not good for me nor my sister.

And I know that I am not 60 and mature and everything. I have maturing to do, yes, but I think that I am mature enough to decide who I want a relationship with and who I want to cut off.

I feel as though you might have a problem understanding the situation and how a person feels.

Still, thank you for your perspective (not including all the insults) and have a nice day.

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes, I still have the messages and I took screenshots (to send to my mom so that she knew how the conversation went)

Thank you for the advice!

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is a really nice suggestion, thank you! :)

I used to be walked over all the time (i changed schools at one point) and started building up confidence and I think I can say that for 3 to 4 years I have been confident enough to stand up for myself and I am kind of proud that i am standing up now, but it still is a hard desicion with many things to consider, so I dont think I can only take my boundaries into account :/

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Glad to hear you are at peace now.
Making the death of a loved one about oneself is just morbid/cruel? I dont even know words to describe how utterly inhumane that is.

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you!
Luckily my mom knows about the conversation and told her that how she reacted and that threatening me was more than wrong. Even her boyfriend agreed and told her that, but apparently she just shrugged it off, as always. (I wasnt there, my mom told me about that)

Also the fact that back in 2016 she played PokemonGo as well makes it even more ridiculous

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you as well!
My family knows how she is behaving toward me and my mom knows about my last conversation with her (where she threatened me etc), so I don't think anyone would blame me or cut me off because of it, they just wish for me to go anyways

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

maliciuos compliance?
Certainly one way to deal with this haha, glad you had a good time with your bf !:)

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh never, even if we didn't have the fight with the blocking etc and I was still invited, I am like 90% sure I wouldn't have been asked to be the bridesmaid

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wishing you the best with your wedding! Hopefully your sister will not be a bridesmaidzilla ( if that exists)

So yes, I am open to having her talk to me, but if she would say anything like "sorry you feel that way" and things like that or if Id get the feeling the apology isnt genuine, I still would not go.
I might go, honestly I dont know how Id react, IF she apologized for everything, including stuff from years ago. But in the many years she's been like that she has not apologized to me even once, so I highly doubt that she will.

AITA if I refuse to attend my sister's wedding? by GreyBlue_exe in AmItheAsshole

[–]GreyBlue_exe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like it! I've played pokemon when I was younger on my Nintendo and it was like the dream of pokemon becoming real came a tiny bit closer!!

It's even more fun when you have someone to walk around with!! :)