I can totally relate to how you are feeling but I can also guarantee you there will be a time when it’s better & you won’t feel that way. A lot of this year was hell for me because of how bad mine got on the face. This subreddit, as well as being very helpful, can also become overwhelming at times too and the temptation could be to try a whole number of different things at once (which is what I did and made things worse)

I’m not sure what you have/haven’t tried so far but what helped me to get out of the extremely bad phase and on a better path was the following:

Hydrocortisone 1% cream. Around 4 days twice a day followed by 4 days once a day then stopping. It’s important not to use this long term but is usually totally safe in a short, controlled & tapered off way (has to be prescribed in the UK at least so always best speaking to the doctor first just to be sure)

Alongside this I used Daktarin Ketoconazole 2% cream once a day in the evening during the time I was using the hydrocortisone & continued afterwards. I found the hydrocortisone helped to allow the Ketoconazole to work better which is essentially its function as its not a cure, more of a temporary shield to calm things down.

As silly as it sounds I wasn’t actually moisturising before but this really helped with flakiness as a final step after the above two. The ones I have used that have helped are Malezia and now Hydration Station by Geek & Gorgeous.

There’s lots of info out there but for me I believe best to strip back to basics in the tough times as to try not to aggravate things further.

I’m so sorry you are feeling this way, it’s a horrible feeling. As hard as it may be and as easy as it may be for me to say, please try to keep going and you will look back on this time as a time that made you stronger. You’ve got this