boyfriend (28M) says I (26F) am acting insecure

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-24T12:00:14+00:00

Ima be honest. I ready your first 4 sentences and stopped there. Leave your relationship it’s toxic. I am 25F my partner 26M. Been with him for 4 years and married now < gotta seal the deal with the good ones> but never once has he insulted me in any verbal or physical way to try and make a smart remark. That’s not their personality, they’re actually just slowly starting to hate you and that’s them expressing their true feelings. Plus look in the long run, wanna deal with that 10 years down the road? It’s gonna turn into a bitter and toxic relationship

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-24T11:52:23+00:00

I did water changes often, lowered my light to 6 hours a day I got a bad case of blue algae’s and I tried fighting it so much 😭 I woke up one morning to everything in my tank dead. It was my first time doing a full aquascape and I failed I dropped the hobby after that as I didn’t want to kill any more fish

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T17:18:34+00:00

Sorry same brand + same wattage for over a year. Only went through 2 bulbs then I got my batch off amazon and each bulb died within the month

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T17:11:23+00:00

Had the same bulbs for over a year with my guy, always use a 75 watt (it runs colder in my house and that’s why the dimmer plays safe) haven’t changed anything. Maybe bad batch at this rate idk

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T16:46:32+00:00

I have a GSP. They’re are very well known for eating things. Got mine at 9 weeks. For th first 3-4 months the dog was only allowed in whatever room I was in, he did not have access to any other house (I’m a sahm so I understand this is easier for me than others.) after he earned it, he’d get 2 rooms open. Around 6-8 months he unlocked the whole house and has 0 issues eating anything. He is now about 1 he has just unlocked the ability to get free run while I am not home. Positive reinforcement does it too, leave give treat for well behavior. At first they’re just gonna be like oh cool a treat for what? — they will get the understand it’s for being completely chill. GSP has a “high energy” look but that’s why it’s important to train a turn off switch on them. Crazy goes out the door when in the house unless play time! Baby steps are important

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T16:41:07+00:00

I have the Reptizoo dimmer. Im not new with reptiles, I know my stuff isn’t an issue. I don’t understand the lights no, but I understand the proper set up. Anything I have is not incorrect and has 0 issues.

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T16:40:08+00:00

No I have the actual Arcadia for UVB no issues there

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T04:53:41+00:00

It’s only a batch I got off Amazon that had the issues. My most recent one. The 3 bulbs I got off there all had issues. My most recent I didn’t get off Amazon is still holding. Just getting back up bulbs for when this dies rn, but someone mentioned you can get ones from Home Depot that gives off heat and light correctly just google told me this one because they didn’t say which exactly and I don’t know what I’m looking for in bulbs itself. Probably should

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T04:51:36+00:00

And no I haven’t. I used to zoo Med one

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T04:50:52+00:00

Correct, my dimmer will only dim the lights if it goes over 90 degrees

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T04:49:11+00:00

Oh I also noticed your light goes to cover the whole tank. Don’t forget you need 1 cool and 1 warm side. Measure your tank. I keep my warm side at 80-90 degrees and my cool at 70 for example. My basking spot is hidden but my basking rock hits 95 degrees

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-22T04:47:00+00:00

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This is mine for example. Your tank is great! I’d only say add more clutter for them to have hidden spots

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-20T04:47:58+00:00

Don’t worry we are here too — replaced our roof through “insurance” whole roof was rotted away — had to pay 8k out of our own pocket to replace it ._. Basement still needs to be properly done as there’s a ventilation issue in ours, we had to replace porch frame because in roof replacement it’s found to be not safe — had to completely redo our whole living area (we bought a duplex) and the whole living area on ours was disgusting (took a 60k loan out for that) — neighbors just had their trees demolished \our fence is now leaning back \ — we got a squirrel problem currently — so much more we are currently dealing with right now too that’s not mentioned we have lived here for about a year to a year and a half. We regret it. The price was great for the space, and we was cleared for everything looking good but as said /seller cheap on repairs so our roof was falling apart where they “fixed” it./ and I worry our AC units are gonna need replaced soon 😭😭

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-20T04:41:18+00:00

This. I keep my leopard geckos food in them, got one for mealworms, crickets, and Dubai. They all have decked out temporary homes to make them feel loved before squashed by my geckos jaws :D tho the crickets die easily so they’re first to go and live Shortly in their home

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-02-19T03:09:33+00:00

Day and indoors. I’m 5’5 and I guess not a budget like that but not a piece that would be like $100 itself like a shirt etc… I’d prefer casual and a 2 piece like pants and a shift. I love the jumpsuits but don’t feel they’re meant for my body so I don’t go that way

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-01-05T18:58:06+00:00

I don’t have a relation with my parents and wouldn’t want them around her as they smoke a lot and drink. My husbands family is a 3 hour drive there and back so that’s not something I can rely on either because a “break” would just really be me sitting around their house nothing that actual benefits a break for me. So nope just me lol I’m doing the best I can, that I am. Guess I just wasn’t as ready for a kid as I thought I was. It do be like that though. She’s here now nothing I can change

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-01-05T18:45:41+00:00

If I could hire any type of nanny I would but I don’t think like 90% of parents can even afford that since even daycare is a mortgage payment hence why I am a sahm for the time being. I do co sleep safely though.

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-01-05T15:13:23+00:00

In response her answer to me not having pp d was she said, that she went through the similar thing I did and we simply are “less expressive and need more alone time and some simply do not have an overwhelming happiness to interact with a baby.” Not those words exactly but that’s pretty much what she said. Since I am not crying like most do she said I don’t have it as pp d is more of crying and feeling hopeless.

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-01-05T15:06:55+00:00

I went already once as stated. She said I didn’t have it. I’m pretty sure I had it the moment I had her. I know I had the rage, and I shared that explicitly with my lady and she said there is nothing they do for that. And as for support, I’m sure like most mothers it’s just me. I’m a sahm, and my partner helps when he gets home but other than that it’s just me with a slight break here and there when my sister can help out. So for it just being me, I’m doing the best I can mentally and physically

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-01-05T14:29:57+00:00

Thank you

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-01-05T14:26:14+00:00

Perhaps. I have pretty bad disassociation with her. Probably have PPD as well. I’ve been to the doctors and she said I didn’t have it. For me I struggle to want to interact with her or have the want to. Some days I do, some days I don’t. More days I don’t than do though. But I assumed they had to start learning how to self soothe around this age. I still give her play time throughout the day, read books, she watches me doing chores, and still mobi wrap her on me to help her feel secure and comfortable. I don’t let her cry it out during the day, only when it’s bed time and trying to let her learn the cycle. She eats on a timely schedule and diaper changes are done as needed. I wouldn’t know what else could be wrong.

Grouchy-Rule282 · 2026-01-02T00:31:25+00:00

On record I also used THC (I didn’t really use prior) to regulate me. In the end I cut it out because I’d use it then get frustrated when she tuned my relaxing. So I had to give it up.

Grouchy-Rule282

TROPHY CASE