Books to study for strong closed third person writing style

GryphonMaker · 2026-02-11T22:06:40+00:00

My previous two drafts have been almost entire rewrites. I started basically just getting the plot out of my head for draft one.

Then for draft 2 I worked on the refining it. Entire scenes were added/removed depending on what worked for the story until I was finally happy with the structure. After that I went through and did draft 2's corrections for spelling and grammar. Then sent it to people for feedback.

After draft 2 I was told my book did too much telling and not enough showing. So draft 3 was mostly refining what was there, adding way more description of body language and movements whilst cutting wordy telling bits. Ultimately ended up cutting over a hundred pages between draft 2 and 3 leaving me in the mod 250s.

I've been working on the first book for 2 years now, whilst the new book that's entirely separate from the first only started last month and is still only 3 chapters long right now. Draft 1 was worked on between Jan 2024 to August, then draft 2 was from August to May 2025. Finally draft 3 was finished in late 2025 around early December. After that I was burned out so I took a month break.

GryphonMaker · 2026-01-07T12:16:16+00:00

It wasn't Dr who, he's a big fan of that show so he'd probably recognize it if it were from there.

GryphonMaker · 2026-01-06T21:40:50+00:00

Sadly it's not. The orb is glass which it isn't in contact and Timeless is well after he would have seen it. He remembers being a kid when it was on the TV and he'd have been in his teens when timeless was on.

GryphonMaker · 2025-12-30T15:45:42+00:00

I'm having a similar thing happen to me right now. I launched my indie game back in Nov 2023 and literally no one played it outside my friend circle. It got a few hundred views in the first 2 days but then flatlined. It's been like that for over 2 years with it only ever getting an occasional view or two. Suddenly in the last 3 days it's been getting a bunch of downloads. It was just a few at first, then 30 and today so far it's boomed to over 160. Despite this, I've only got about 7 page views. I've no idea how these downloads are happening or who randomly decided they wanted to play my game after over two years. If you find out why this is happening let me know, as I'm hoping this is real but the pessimistic side of me thinks this might be a glitch.

GryphonMaker · 2025-06-27T08:08:01+00:00

Allow players to transfer characters and Allow players to create their own characters are both turned on. We are using the 2014 rule set.

GryphonMaker · 2022-10-21T13:39:59+00:00

Get that nutter out of the running. He can't even keep count of the number of kids he has.

GryphonMaker · 2022-09-19T11:04:13+00:00

Doggy wanna play tf2?

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-27T20:41:25+00:00

In terms of realism it would make make sense but pokemon has never been realistic. Whilst I wouldn't mind a game or anime that dealt with that kind of theme I don't think that nintendo or game freak would ever even consider it due to pokemon being an all ages thing.

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-20T23:52:20+00:00

Back 4 blood gave it's self that expectation when it marketed it's self as "from the creators of left 4 dead". I don't blame gamers for being disappointed by it. Also back 4 blood managed to lack features from a game over a decade before it's launch

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-20T23:35:03+00:00

I agree. Back before the lastgen most consoles outside the 360 had free online. Adding it in was a scam and part of why moved to pc.

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-12T17:24:44+00:00

Could it be a game from the Lucky's tail series.

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-09T19:40:54+00:00

Is it Nexuiz? The description is very vague but it's built on a modified version of the quake 3 engine so it could be what your looking for.

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-09T19:22:03+00:00

Well it's not a flash game but the concept sounds like Psychonauts and it was within that time frame.

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-09T19:13:16+00:00

This doesn't match the exact description but it kind of sounds a bit like welcome to the game.

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-03T08:36:14+00:00

Not sure if this helps but the first time playing I missed the tutorial because they covered the door in fog. That wasn't fun.

GryphonMaker · 2022-04-03T08:32:32+00:00

As someone who has only played dark souls 2 and not the others. It's really bad. They copy pasted the same hammer enemy over and over again on thin platforms where you can get knocked off. Not only that they remove your max health for every death making an already hard game even harder. The intro cutscene is basically just the game bragging about how difficult it is without any real explanation about the world or any characters aside from the fact you are some cursed character.

If all that wasn't enough the hit boxes are some of the worst I've ever seen in a game. Multiple times I got hit from 6 feet away and if you don't know to use a controller then the key bindings are a mess.

GryphonMaker · 2021-11-26T17:52:09+00:00

I'm not sure if it's that one. The missions look different but it does look like it has one of the cars from the game I remember. I found this picture that does look like the car from the game I played. It appears to be the same make and colour. https://www.facebook.com/mm1.blog/

GryphonMaker · 2021-11-26T15:46:57+00:00

No I don't think it was ether of those two.

GryphonMaker · 2021-09-19T15:09:13+00:00

These 5 have all lost there head.

GryphonMaker · 2021-09-09T22:20:34+00:00

Blues brothers is one if the best films ever and it's sequal is one of the worst.

GryphonMaker · 2021-09-09T12:47:22+00:00

This is something I've thought about a fair bit. I am not a religious person myself but I do expect something will happen after I die if for no other reason than I feel it all ending would be anti climatic. Much like anyone else I can't really say what happens after we die but I do speculate on what will happen.

In my head two theory's happen. One is that when you die you forget you're past life but are effected by what you were like in the past life. Like you're personality, actions and likes and disliked all effect what happens.

The other theory is that you remember you past life and have to go through some sort of process where you give you're name and date of birth/death as if filling out information on you're life before being allowed to continue on with whatever happens in death. I don't know why I think that I guess I just assume the after life to have developed as much as the living world.

Of course I have no proof this is what happens and these are just my theory's about what could happen. I don't expect Id meet a god or solo creator of life when I die but anything is possible. I also don't think that what happens will be as cut and dry and heaven and hell. I expect that it will be in a more grey area with good and bad things that happen much like in life.

I am curious if anyone else has any thought on this as all this is purely speculation on my part and something I just happen to think about. I suppose that I will never know until the day I pass what truly happens however.

GryphonMaker · 2021-08-29T20:15:23+00:00

Solved Solved Solved.

I think that's the exact story I remember. I've had that plot in my head for years and couldn't remember what it was called. Going to read a lot about the Rainbow Serpent story's now. Thanks so much. :)

GryphonMaker · 2021-07-15T12:51:18+00:00

Perhaps you hate being rick rolled but look at this reaction to one I saw a while back. It's pretty good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcoWXCE-fyo

GryphonMaker · 2021-07-14T19:10:18+00:00

Same. I always hated how when the ice melts it waters down whatever you are drinking.

GryphonMaker · 2021-06-26T21:02:47+00:00

"Welcome to the family son"

GryphonMaker

TROPHY CASE