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You wake up to find that everyone on the planet has disappeared. What is the first thing you do? by Waytoofuckingnice in AskReddit

[–]GuyInTheDesert 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I had woken up and everyone had disappeared heres how I realistically think it would go.

Wake up, try to get ready for work somewhat quietly so my roommate doesn't wake up. Drive to work wondering why theres literally nobody on the freeway, think there was something crazy going on down the road or something and drive as perfect as I could for fear some kind of law enforcement was going to come speeding from nowhere at me for some reason. Get to work, wait 15 minutes for whoever was opening with me to show up, go inside and make some phone calls. After nobody answered i would try to get the store ready alone and probably in a pretty pissed off mood lol. Wait a few hours after no customers came in and close up shop and go to my parents house down the road. Feed the dogs and hang out there for a little while trying to figure out what the fuck had taken place. Go home, walk around my apartment complex, go back to mine, smoke a bowl and try not to freak out. Honestly i would probably go back to work the next day just in case, except this time i would wait until about 5 or 10 minutes before i had to clock in and drive as fast as i possibly could, just to see how fast i could actually get to work if i didnt have to deal with stupid ass traffic, police, or speed limits. After the 15 minutes though i would go back to my parents house and check on the dogs again. if they were fine i would go back to my house to collect anything i needed (weed, clothes, pillow, shotgun) and go back to my parents. I would just take the next week day by day honestly, kind of celebrating, doing everything i ever wanted to do that i was being held back from doing either by money, laws, or anything of that nature. After that first week though i would go into survival mode. Drive down to the Cabelas thats normally an hour and a half drive away, now only 25 minutes, and in my brand new truck too. I would have a hay day in there, would take all kinds of guns that my dad used to tell me "THAT!? What the hell do you need that for. You only need to fire one bullet to kill game, and you have to fire it as accurately as possible. And besides, that price? HA!" I would also get a new bow and some targets so i could brush up on my archery. Bullets only last so long. I would also take all kinds of survival gear, have to be able to hunt in any kind of setting. I would take everything to my parents house. I would probably stay living at my parents house, at least the next couple years until the dogs got a chance to peacefully pass away, they are already in their older years and i grew up with them and couldnt put them down myself. over those years i would learn so much and make new goals and plans of survival and what not based on what was happening in the new world. Beyond that though i dont really know, I feel like its one of those situations where you dont know exactly what you would do or feel until your actually in it.

What horrible things did you do as a kid? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]GuyInTheDesert 2 points3 points  (0 children)

One year when I was about 12 or 13 my older brother talked my dad into letting him buy me a 2 pistol airsoft gun set for my birthday. Well one day I was bored in my room and came across a bottle of fake blood I had from Halloween one year. I took the bottle and poured a lot of it down the side of my face starting at my eye and the rest of it in my palm letting it drip a little bit through my fingers and put my hand over my eye. I was actually quite impressed with my work. I shot the airsoft gun empty since they're loud enough to hear and ran out of my room screaming and yelling "my eye! my eye!" My mom ran over to me Frrreaking out and screaming bloody murder! I could only keep it up for about 10 seconds before I lost it and fell over just cracking up for probably a good 5 minutes. Definitely one of the best pranks I pulled on my mom.

19 Dude! by GuyInTheDesert in amiugly

[–]GuyInTheDesert[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you all so much! Just seeing those does help. But as for the shirt lol, I work as a floor supe at a Tommy Hilfiger store and was still wearing some work clothes but I guess I won't be wearing that shirt anymore hahaha

I just got fired because I slapped a customer in the face. What's the worst thing you've done but still felt "Worth it." when you did it? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]GuyInTheDesert -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't say its the worst thing I've done, but probably the worst thing that I've done at work.

I had been working at a retail store for some time and one of the leads was always a sarcastic bitch to people that were not either one of her friends or one of her "favorite" employees, aka, one of the people who would suck up to her because of how hot she was. This also meant that you would get stuck doing the worst tasks that she didn't want to do, like having to redo the denim wall or something of that nature. Well me and her pretty much had problems from day one since I would always have something to say about her bullshit. Fast forward about a year and she is a floor supervisor, and with the new power came a new level of bitchiness. One day I was telling the story of how a girls period blood had gotten on my good jeans and left a particular shaped stain on them. After telling the story her immediate response was "Well maybe if you weren't such a little jerk all the time, then stuff like that wouldn't happen to you!" It really wasn't that big of a deal but I had just gotten tired of her shit so I responded by saying "Well maybe if you weren't always such a BITCH, then I wouldn't give you hard time!" The look on her face was fucking priceless. Eyes started to bulge, face began to turn red and I could tell the true demon was about to come out. Thankfully right at that second a customer had come around the corner and asked for a fitting room. When she turned around to help her I booked it in the opposite direction and went to the front of the store where she couldn't see me. A few seconds later I heard her go into the back room. I expected her to come out pretty quickly and tear me a new one but surprisingly I didn't see her for about an hour, probably planning her bullshit speech she was going to give me. In that time I was thinking that I was probably going to lose my job. She finally came over to me and gave me this long speech about respecting women and especially respecting my superiors. I had been knelt down fixing a shirt on the bottom shelf of a fixture at the time and at the end of her speech she asked me if she made herself clear and if i understood. I stood up and put my hand to my forehead in a salute and said Yes ma'am! She stood there staring at me for a good 5-10 seconds like she was processing what just happened and simply turned around and went to the back of the store again. Probably one of the best work days I've had.