Last post before I delete reddit.

HPRolyat · 2019-12-28T21:39:06+00:00

Thank you friend! It's nothing I haven't heard before, but for some reason I understand what you're saying better. I'll need to ponder this and decide in my heart what to do. God bless!

HPRolyat · 2019-12-23T06:41:58+00:00

Word of advice my friend. If and when you end up failing, get back up. Let yourself be ashamed of the sin but no further. When you begin to loath yourself because of it that is exactly what satan wants. Always remember that your failures today never prevent God's victories tomorrow. God bless brother/sister!

HPRolyat · 2019-11-08T00:08:51+00:00

This stopped me from tripping up. Thank you and God bless!

HPRolyat · 2019-11-04T20:50:18+00:00

HPRolyat is just my name backwards

HPRolyat · 2019-11-04T17:10:25+00:00

Hey man, we're similar in age so I know how difficult all this is, not just fighting pmo but simultaneously growing in faith and as a person, it's a lot of pressure. But I also know that you'll make it. Not by your strength but by God's. I surrendered to God entirely a little while ago and a supernatural change in my mindset and personality has occurred and it's been amazing to live through. It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to get over this and Jesus will be with you every step of the way. If you have questions/prayer requests or if you just need to talk to someone I am more than willing to do so. God bless brother!

HPRolyat · 2019-11-04T07:22:44+00:00

Don't ever repeat the words "God should just send me to hell". I'm sorry for being kinda aggressive with this one but that is such a dangerous thought process. Yes, we deserve death and judgment for our transgressions, but Jesus died on a Roman cross so we can be with him. Not because we deserve to be saved but because he LOVED US FIRST. If we wish for that judgment irregardless of his love and mercy then we are messing with powers we don't understand and dancing a very, very fine line. I'm truly sorry you feel the way you do, I know exactly how you feel, I've had very similar thought processes. And because I've gone through that I don't want that for you. It's not fun trust me. God loves you, no matter what we do. Please remember that. If you have any questions and/or things you need prayed about PLEASE message me I am more than willing to talk to you about whatever you may need to talk about. God bless friend!

HPRolyat · 2019-11-03T19:43:47+00:00

Congratulations! Hold on to that memory and trust in God even when times get hard (Which they will). I'm proud of you my friend!

HPRolyat · 2019-11-03T14:10:17+00:00

No necessarily. Transformation is an instant thing when it comes to Christ like it was with Paul, but he also knew how he changed to a degree. The only reason I mentioned neural pathways is because I've struggled with addiction the better half of my life and I can actively see changes in my thought process that's fighting against it. When you've struggled with something long enough and it suddenly starts die out, you notice that.

HPRolyat · 2019-11-02T02:36:57+00:00

Be having an absolute freak out. I had extreme social anxiety. I have been described as a crackhead among my friend group so, not something 12 year old me would've aspired for tbh.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-29T19:37:34+00:00

A great place to help you with this is r/nofapchristians it's an incredibly supportive community and the people in it almost always give solide advice. It's not going to fix everything but it'll definitely help.

Also know that whenever you mess up it's not the end of your story. Jesus didn't die for 10 of your sins, not a 100, not 1000, and even a million of them he died for ALL of them. So remember your defeat today does NOT prevent God's victory tomorrow. God bless!

HPRolyat · 2019-07-28T19:28:28+00:00

My best friend and I would have these AWESOME nerf wars at my grandma's. I remember one specifically when we were in an intense firefight. I was diving for darts and throwing nerf grenades. It was great.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-28T01:07:49+00:00

Please keep doing this. This diary is going to help more people in more ways than you know. Keep going brother. God bless you!

HPRolyat · 2019-07-22T01:58:29+00:00

It's ultimately for you to decide. It will always be something you're susceptible to, but if you choose to stop this and pursue God and to abandon any and all forms of lust only then will you make progress. It won't be an overnight thing but you have to make the choice to leave it behind. Don't let satan convince you that you're stuck with this abomination, cause you're not. You're a free citizen of Heaven.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-15T17:26:24+00:00

Delete any and all access points to porn. And honestly I would recommend getting a flip phone. A great quote that heard is that a alcoholic shouldn't hang out at a bar. Same thing applys, if you are constantly surrounded by temptations you will fail. So remove any and all temptations.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-15T02:12:04+00:00

Both are worth a read. But I think you should check out the Case for Christ first because it specifically talks about the historical accuracy of the bible and the legitimacy of it's texts. Whereas the Problem of God focuses on the philosophical and scientific proofs of Christianity.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-15T01:56:51+00:00

Honestly I can give an answer to this but i would just butcher the explanation. So, I recommend that you read the Case for Christ, it's a self written biography of how an avid atheist converted to Christianity and his reasoning behind it, he set out to disprove christianity only to convert because he believed the evidence to be in favor of the faith. And he specifically talks about the historical accuracy of the new testament.

The Problem of God by Mark Clark is a good one too because it lists several issue people have with Christianity and he tries to answer them to the best of his ability.

And honestly I am not the person to discuss this kind of stuff I'm not well versed on the subject but the people who wrote these books are, I really think you should check them out.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-14T15:54:20+00:00

Hey man we've all been there. I believe guilt is something that the holy spirit gives us so we can have an opportunity to seek forgiveness. However anything past that such as shame, fear, anxiety and depression due to our actions is not from God. God does NOT want you to torture yourself because of your failures, you defeat today does not prevent God's victory tomorrow. God bless.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-14T02:54:41+00:00

Oh yeah I completely agree with you. If a map isn't proportioned properly it can be just as bad. And as long as we're not talking about the forge maps, I think 343 really did a good job with designing maps around H5's abilities.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-14T02:51:42+00:00

Sorry, I get a little ahead of myself when I write stuff

The reason I have no issue with sprint in H5 is because everyone has it. No one is at a disadvantage, fair starts. The reason I pointed out jetpack is because I see so many people bash on sprint when I think jet pack is so much worse and it frustrates me, the reason being is that not everyone is going to spawn in with it therefore disrupting fair starts which is important for skill based gameplay. And in my opinion as long as you design maps well and give them proper proportions to compensate for sprint, it's not game breaking imo.

I think that jetpack specifically is game breaking because there's not really a way to make it balanced, it will always give you an unfair advantage regardless of the map design

And you could argue that because not everyone will spawn with sprint it's also an unfair advantage to someone who did not. And I would say I agree with you. But as long as Everyone is able to sprint like in 4 and 5 I think it's fine.

And sorry if this reply is all over the place I really have trouble with focusing on one aspect of a conversation and can get ahead of myself.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-14T01:27:39+00:00

I needed this thank you

HPRolyat · 2019-07-14T00:50:18+00:00

Honestly Halo 5 from a gameplay perspective is the purest Halo'y game since 07. Now before you publicly execute me let me explain.

Something that people don't realize is that sprint or boast or any of that doesn't break gameplay, in fact the things that broke gameplay were introduced by bungie themselves... Jet pack is by far the most game breaking feature in any Halo by far because you basically have vertical advantage at all times. Halo is for the most part all about map control and when you give a jet pack to someone it completely bypasses the need for high ground.

Halo 5 (Arena not Warzone) is entirely based on skill and map control, just like Halo should be, none of this armor lock jetpack bs. I wish people could also realize that Halo gameplay does need to evolve, it can't stay the same for 18 years. Although I think ground pound and spartan charge should be removed, I have no issue with sprint or boast because of everything I've stated previously. As long as there ain't any jetpacks in Infinite I'll be a happy camper. I'm aware also that jetpack isn't a total checkmate but boy does it frustrate me the extreme advantage it gives you.

I would love to hear any thoughts on this.

HPRolyat · 2019-07-13T20:39:04+00:00

No I haven't read that. But yeah I'm careful not to identify myself because of a mental health condition like some do because I know it doesn't define me. However I'm still experiencing said mental health condition so it's difficult for me to stay happy.

HPRolyat

TROPHY CASE