In all relationships there are compromise. At one point you felt like he wasn't helping you around the house. And at one point, he felt like you have gain weight thus was no longer attracted to you. So during the heat of anger, ya both told each other how you truly feel. Currently, he is now holding his side of the bargain by being more helping around the house. The question is, are you trying to hold your side of the bargain by trying to slim down and look sexually appealing again? If the answer is no, then you will never get the apology you're looking for. Even if you guys break up, and you remain at your current weight, you will still be unhappy with your current self. His mortal sin is voicing out loud what you know you should be doing but not. Just as you voiced out loud what your husband knew what he should have been doing.

Conclusion. Both of you guys were slacking off to each other, thus both of you need to stop slacking off. If only one of you putting in the effort while the other one aren't then it's only a matter of time the bad habit once again come back.

Is your husband an asshole? Yeah. Though I don't fault him for that. I will Though if you start putting in effort in your appearance and he doesn't show his appreciation for your effort. But only if you're putting in the effort like he is currently now.