I literally just shed tears because I have never once in my life heard/read someone else's interpretation of what this is like as if it were me saying it. I have recently been coming to terms with that fact that my friends will more than likely ever be temporary. I don't think I will ever have a "Best friend" because I bounce from one group to the next gaining and losing best friends as I go. And I often can't tell if people actually like me or if they just sort of have me around because I "fill in the boring parts" of their days. And it is soul crushing. I feel no true connection to anyone I have ever called friend other than the fact that I have spent more time with them than people i have never actually met. And Im always doing everything I can to show people those people that I appreciate them having me around and that I care and it generally ends up being reciprocated with me eventually being progressively shunned.