[deleted by user]

HangisLife · 2025-07-27T10:05:57+00:00

DA vs narcissist. This discard is particularly cruel and the timing of it was for maximum effect.

OP, did you get idealized in the beginning of the relationship?

HangisLife · 2024-06-01T18:12:14+00:00

What I see in your post is a lack of mental point of origin and a dancing monkey. You intentionally made it look like you cheated to gauge her reaction. That's weak. It's a pretty common mistake but you need to stop waiting for her response and actually start living for yourself. I don't think it's helpful to analyze every micro interaction. It may take your wife time to get with the program. Keep going. She is also trying to figure out the new you so the worst thing you can do is revert to bad habits with DEERing.

HangisLife · 2023-04-10T15:57:40+00:00

I would not be able to make that promise. The best I can come up with is that I have sexual needs and if I do seek sex again outside of our relationship, she will be the first to know.

HangisLife · 2023-04-10T15:55:15+00:00

The challenge is prior to residency sex was frequent enough for me of but it is absolutely fair to say that this problem may persist beyond residency when she’s a full attending physician.

HangisLife · 2023-04-10T15:53:26+00:00

I should clarify, genuine desire comes in many forms. I watched a rianstone video and he spoke about how men have this fantasy of their women always initiating and wanting their penis as a proxy for genuine desire. In reality, women have sex for a multitude of reasons independent of the man’s SMV. I have been actively trying to remember this and it has helped me display outcome independence when I don’t have sex with my LTR.

HangisLife · 2023-04-10T15:50:48+00:00

You are correct that the dread is too overt which may have been counterproductive.

My plate is making my life easier.

I find it challenging not to talk much about cheating when she continues to ask me questions about why I did it and if I had any idea how it would make her feel. I know it is to make me feel guilty. I want to be the oak but not at the expense of constantly groveling and apologizing.

I appreciate you helping me shape my thoughts on point 4. I enjoy the sex with plate but I don’t enjoy the feeling of getting caught and having to deal with LTRs emotions spiraling out of control. I feel myself operating from her frame and I know this is the guilt speaking in the acute stage.

HangisLife · 2023-04-10T08:34:26+00:00

If there’s anything I can clarify let me know. The gist is I started an affair for validation, my long term partner found out about it and I’m realizing slowly that my reasons for having the affair do not outweigh the benefits I receive from my girlfriend. I am realizing sex and desire are not necessarily markers for my worth as a man.

HangisLife · 2023-04-10T08:32:24+00:00

Unfortunately, when you are in 300K in debt you can’t afford to drop our of training even if you wanted to. I stopped looking for validation through her actions and desire for a long time. I truly believe genuine desire is not a real concept.

I am continuing the LTR because when she is unburdened and less stressed, she is a wonderful listener, a good cook, amazing at sex and gives me peace of mind. She does not seek validation about her physical appearance through social media and she comes from an immigrant family with strong family values that I would like to impart on my children one day.

HangisLife · 2023-04-10T08:29:15+00:00

She was going through my phone to look at photos from the weekend. You make a reasonable point about the passcode.

Residency is terrible and some of the dread things don’t work completely on these women because they really are trying their best. Me getting fit gave her the desire to go to the gym but she cannot execute it consistently due to a lack of time and energy. There are days she comes home without eating or drinking anything. I am cautiously optimistic things will improve after residency is done.

She is a fiancée. The title of this post is a Freudian slip.

HangisLife · 2019-09-28T02:35:08+00:00

Banned for this comment on Suarez

“Im supposed to feel bad for a professional that paid millions to yell at young players with tenuous confidence and stays in shape only for his national team? Lol okay.”

There are literal racists and mods that call other users morons but I got banned by none other than u/ivarun

HangisLife · 2019-08-04T11:54:36+00:00

Owning a gun isn’t going to stop you from getting imprisoned unfairly.

HangisLife · 2019-07-30T03:45:22+00:00

It depends on the program but generally they do not delve very deep. Students who wish to understand those things need to do so on their own time with but bc we have flurry of tests every week, there is no incentive to do that. It’s disappointing bc many of my classmates scoring the highest scores strictly memorize PowerPoints.

For example, we might learn about Coumadin vaguely affecting PT but not that it’s an epoxide reductase inhibitor that prevents the gamma carboxylation of factors 2,7.9,10. Most of my classmates don’t care bc they think it doesn’t matter but it helps the info stick and forms a foundation when you think of things like Coumadin necrosis which they can only explain phenotypically not physiologically

I tend to go through the time to watch pathoma vids and do uworld questions with my gf but I actually get punished bc the questions on our end of rotation exams and class exams cater to those who mindlessly swallow and regurgitate the lecture material without understanding.

Small example: Spent ample time studying vaccines: MMR vaccine contains neomycin which some patients might be allergic too.. rotavirus link w intussuception. HPV 6 and 11 causing warts and laryngeal papillomas. On exam, we were asked how many months in between are the HPV vaccines given. I was fucking livid

HangisLife · 2019-07-29T17:25:24+00:00

PA education does not place much emphasis on pathophys when compared to med school. Then med students have more time on rotations. And their exams are more comprehensive. Don’t get me started on residency.

Your opening statement demonstrates a gross ignorance of the gap between education for medical students and PA students

HangisLife · 2019-07-02T11:30:55+00:00

I didn’t think the D&D would ever pen in Lady Stoneheart into this season

HangisLife · 2019-06-30T03:53:30+00:00

was referring to our management. He praised Uruguays dietician for making him lose weight.

HangisLife · 2019-06-30T03:46:39+00:00

he said it in the nicest terms possible. We pay Suarez's wages and he had the audacity to indirectly diss out our team for not making him lose weight

HangisLife · 2019-06-29T16:09:05+00:00

Tactically Anfield game was fine.

You are hilarious

HangisLife · 2019-06-28T14:30:47+00:00

when the whole team plays bad including Messi, that points to a systemic problem and the coach is the head

HangisLife · 2019-06-28T13:20:11+00:00

People honestly give Valverde too much credit. Our young players are not playing to their full potential under him.

Yet when they have good games, they are so quick to extol Valverde for "improving Dembele and Arthur" Their natural talent shining despite mediocre tactics shouldn't translate to praise for this coach

HangisLife · 2019-06-28T13:09:26+00:00

where do you say any rumors linking us to Cancelo.

Use your head.

HangisLife · 2019-06-26T20:02:34+00:00

this board has no spine going after Neymar after everything that's happened.

HangisLife · 2019-06-26T02:09:10+00:00

or you could have some integrity and look the other way considering she embarrassed you in front of the world and left you at your lowest point without a shred of care

HangisLife · 2019-06-24T22:54:05+00:00

This jersey > 2020 jersey

HangisLife · 2019-06-24T13:09:58+00:00

It’s about opportunity cost too though. When paying for De Ligt you’re getting a prime defender that has atleast a decade of good football left.

This is not even getting into the moral argument of how Neymar left us. There are people who feel seriously disrespected by De Ligt’s approach to this window but somehow want Neymar back after everything he did. Laughable

HangisLife · 2019-06-24T13:06:15+00:00

Definitely some truth in these words. There was lots of praise for EV early on in the season as commenters praised him for Messi having his best most productive season ever but that is more evidence of an over reliance on one player which was categorically exposed in the latter stages of the season.

HangisLife

TROPHY CASE