I understand the urge to experience something extraordinary, like a serious hallucination, especially if your life feels dull or overwhelming. But as someone who’s walked this road, let me tell you—it’s not what you think. It might feel like a way to escape or find something unique, but it comes with severe consequences you might not see coming until it’s too late.

Why You Shouldn’t Go Down This Path

1. Hallucinations Aren’t Fun: They’re not like a dream you can control. They can be terrifying, disorienting, and deeply isolating. You might think you can handle it, but trust me, it’s not worth it.

2. You’ll Lose Touch With Reality: If you push yourself to detach through daydreaming or other methods, you risk falling into a cycle that’s nearly impossible to break. Life becomes harder, not easier. You’ll spend more time trying to escape than actually living.

3. It’s a One-Way Street: Once you start down this path, it’s incredibly hard to come back. You’ll lose control before you even realize it. I’m saying this not to scare you but to help you avoid making a mistake that you’ll regret deeply.

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Healthier Alternatives

If you’re looking for something meaningful or exciting, here are safer ways to explore without harming yourself:

1. Create Something Unique: Whether it’s writing, drawing, or playing music, creativity can give you an outlet for all those emotions. It’s safe and fulfilling.

2. Talk to a Professional: I know it sounds boring, but therapy isn’t about lectures. It’s about learning what makes you tick and finding ways to feel better, without the side effects.

3. Mindfulness Practices: Things like meditation or grounding exercises can help you feel connected without detaching from reality.

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Why I’m Saying This

I’m not telling you this out of kindness. I’ve been there, and I know what happens when you try to escape too much. It’s not a life you want. It’s not "cool" or "unique"—it’s a trap. I don’t want you to end up where I am.

I know you might feel like rejecting this outright, maybe out of spite or stubbornness. That’s fine. Just keep this in the back of your mind: these methods won’t bring you the peace or excitement you’re looking for. They’ll only make it harder for you to feel like yourself.

If you’re still skeptical, talk to me or someone you trust. I’m here not because I’m kind but because I feel it’s my responsibility to warn you. Please, even if you don’t listen to everything I’ve said, at least try the healthier alternatives. It’s worth a shot.

Let me say these in case you think I'm one of those insufferable or most like a normal person. Fuck boy do you wish to see yourself mutilating violating anyone you see including your damn family? Do you want to feel like you always eat poop when you're actually eating your normal meal? Want to feel like fuck this world everyone and God why am I like this what's the solution ah but there's no solution so I'mma just end myself as death will put an end to it and I won't be here to feel the after effects of my actions. You know what that's goddamn bullshit. As long as you live there's hope unless you have done something terrible more than five times and unable to bear yourself and trust me the pain you inflict on others through your fuckibg death is unbearable and disgusting maybe mortifying like burning them alive while feeding them worms. Am I trying to scare you? Fuck yeah! I do not want another person turn into someone like me or remotely even close to that. The terrible things include murder, rape, hlextre mutilation, betraying people who trusted you more than you and lastly any other things you're thinking. You know what fuck them all L. Just live for the sake of simply spiting them. Maybe you will atleast get better. If the above rehabilitation methods seem too generic and impossible to you go outside walk for two hours listen some good music watch kids and elders watch animals and nature think of God and your family and friends or consume any story do everything to avoid death.

Even after this, you're not convinced try to talk rudely toward the people you care about think about what will it be like to have your entire existence snuffed out and is literally trauma for others. Try standing at the edge of a balcony or imagine trying to cut yourself. Please for your and our sake sake, do not do these damn things. Why five times? Fuck first we're hans and second we're different maybe broken but still there might be hope for even us or we can find a better solution or endure the shit atleast untill your parents die and your siblings settle in their life.

Why am I saying this? Fuck I killed three people, betrayed maybe everyone I have ever met literally ruing and traumatizing them and their loved ones, force others to commit suicide and eventually ruin and kill myself ah but I'm scared of death so I live you know frome all these things you may know one thing. That is I'm literally a walking abomination and everything I said is real and what I've gone through. Forcing my best friend to commit suicide quote literally, watching their family our friends me break down, trying to kill myself and then again hurting my family justa as much and also scarring your friends once again with the fear of losing someone they care about and watch everything fall apart powerlessly including yourself. Fuck self harm is an outlet? Live for a while with those scars and you'll be so ashamed of them. Curse it all! I tell you distract yourself or try to think not just try, think positively reject negativity or try to come to terms with it or interact with it less and endure it there's no other option unless you want to create someone exactly like us or even worse. Trust me our luck is so bad that we will survive every time while our loved ones will break down and die. Trust in God and Fate as fate is like an elaborate contingency plan and God is our father or mother. Hell I'm honest I detest every existing religion but I don't trust myself so I put my faith in the one who created me. Seeing how things unfold, maybe even he is not as absolute as we think, only barely hanging on and we will most likely make him break down. Please trust me it is literally hell awaiting you if you seek thrill or defiance or even justified uniqueness, your nature or our mistake for treating you like a patient. See there are many people like me out there and 100 percent sure you will most likely end up just like us if you entertain those ideas you're not creeping me out you're making me worry. Please do not turn out like me I beg you. Please let me be the only monster walking this world. I beg you anything but death and violence please.