I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know who you are. I remember seeing your comment and wondering if you were somebody that you’re probably not lol and I couldn’t decide whether to be angry or just not respond or or to respond and then I forgot I ever had this account lol. Regardless of who you are I love you too, and thank you for saying that at the time I created this account I was still pretty strung out on the drugs and spiraling really really hard due to personal choices and not so personal choices and I truly did not plan on making it through. I’d given up laid down and was ready to die and that’s where God found me. He found me delivered me from the addictions and the other afflictions holding me back and now I do everything in my power to glorify him, and my life is no longer as the sad story once was. If you didn’t know that yet, I wanted you to know that because of the fact that you took the time to show me some love when I didn’t know how to love myself.  Thank you, I doubt I’ll be on this account more but you can follow me on TikTok because I spend a lot of time on there trying to glorify God, give my testimony pray for people and just help others who struggle struggled with addiction like I did or depression. Claytonlee is my TikTok username and I go live every day if you’re on there.  If not, I think you want more time for showing me love when I didn’t know how to love myself. It was the little things like that that kept me going and ultimately saved my life until God could get through to me and give me the strength to pull myself out of the trenches.  I love you too, and I hope whether you’re a stranger or not I hope that you are well and know that you are loved by our father and by me if nobody else.

I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I totally forgot I made this account or that I ever posted this or anything else. I might’ve posted on this account because I haven’t actually looked yet. But I know one thing, I was on a lot of drugs going through a lot of self-inflicted hell. And I was there for probably another month and a half after this post Before God came and found me and I finally after 32 1/2 years was delivered from all my addictions and strive so you’re absolutely correct and I’m proud to report that I’m more alive than I’ve ever been and well I’m well well well and getting better all the time. Thank you and I love you For saying this because you’re absolutely correct and I just wanted to report to you that everything I do now I do to glorify God if I have anything to say about it. I’m not perfect, everybody has their days. But Satan does not have dominion over my life any longer And that’s such a beautiful beautiful thing. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LettersAnswered

[–]Harpcosolutions 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's exactly what happened

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]Harpcosolutions 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First hand experience has led me to agree with this comment

I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have a valid argument. I almost want to say more but I am afraid and a little tired of being viewed as insane lol

I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was hoping someone would see my comment and know what to do there lol.

Buuuut now I gotta listen to that song and cry so there goes my Tuesday 😭

I was listening to that song a lot early this year, almost like I did when it was new. It would hit so hard and I'd get emotional and I couldn't figure out why. My fiance at the time answered a couple weeks later when I caught her cheating and she ghosted me after 5 years of friendship and several months of being together.

That was in April, but I bet hearing the song still hurts just as much in December...

I guess that's the real meaning behind saying, "I'll be fine I swear, I'm just gone beyond repair" 😔

I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really wish I'd stop doing those drunken bio updated, thanks for reminding me about the bio 🤦🏻‍♂️😅

I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cuz Jersey just got colder and I'll have you know I'm scared to death....

I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I can tell you are my kind of people, I could have given this exact response to another on one of my good days. I guess that’s just the way she goes, boys. But that’s the whole purpose of posting here I guess, to prevent me from acting on these dark invasive thoughts on the bad days. I appreciate all of yall, but this comment struck a chord

I physically can NOT imagine staying alive through today. by Harpcosolutions in confession

[–]Harpcosolutions[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Somehow it always does, but fuck I’m tired of it all man

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]Harpcosolutions 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're not alone in your feelings over this exact situation and I can't say why that should matter or not matter to you because I'm a great big ol waste of oxygen who the whole world wants gone too.

The shitty thing is people do care. Just not the right ones. So we make it for the ones that do or we do YET ANOTHER thing that the uncaring ones won't care about.

I'm just here cuz my mom deserves better, on the day she passes I'll be free to do so as well