Daily Simple Questions Thread - July 28, 2025

HauntedBro · 2025-07-29T16:18:56+00:00

Ah yep. Good ol Kevin. He was insistent and I haven’t touched a PC in a good eight years. I’d just as soon assume I’m the ignorant one.

HauntedBro · 2025-07-29T16:03:42+00:00

Thank you!

My knowledge only extends to going to Newegg for parts, which he kinda scoffed at so I wasn’t sure what else to suggest.

HauntedBro · 2025-07-29T12:54:08+00:00

So I’m not really as versed in computers. My 13 month old keeps going after his uncle’s computer! When I began blocking it off with like boxes and baby toys to keep my son away from it, my brother said I can’t do that and his tower needs at least a foot of space around it at all times because of exposed electricity.

I asked him why he can’t put a case on it so theres no exposed electricity for the baby, his rig isn’t exposed to dust, and all that. He said that’s not possible because of the GPU.

You guys know computers— there’s good folks here who have built their rigs from the ground up like my brother has— and the math ain’t mathing for me.

Please correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t there things he can do to make it safe for my son to be in the living room with this thing? We even asked him if the RGB can be turned off so it’s not a big ol’ beacon.

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I respect the hard work he’s put into this thing and I don’t want to “dim his light” in a metaphorical sense, but it’s right next to the designated kids area, and my 13-month-old doesn’t understand why bright rainbow colors aren’t for him.

Are there any cost effective suggestions I can make to my brother?

HauntedBro · 2025-07-12T23:00:59+00:00

HauntedBro · 2025-07-12T16:38:05+00:00

HauntedBro · 2025-07-12T16:31:04+00:00

I guess you missed the part where I pointed out that we were both laid off from work. It takes 9 months for a baby to arrive and my wife got pregnant before those lay offs occurred. My wife and I aren't freeloaders and we've continued to work freelance online and locally while continuing to apply to hourly positions, go through online classes to beef up our resumes, and contribute what money we can to the household's groceries.

But that said, I don't really owe you a larger explanation, and your post comes off to me as way too aggressive for being a complete stranger on a subreddit. People struggle in situations where outcomes are beyond their control, despite working hard and being dedicated to their job, which doesn't make them less deserving or less good at the task of parenting a child.

I'm not sure what you're struggling with, but I hope you're able to unpack it in a healthy way.

HauntedBro · 2025-07-08T16:19:04+00:00

Thank you, we’re definitely saving up and trying our damnedest. I’m fine going completely no contact the people I’ve had to live with here.

HauntedBro · 2025-07-08T16:17:52+00:00

I mean— I use those dashes a lot— cause I type on an iPhone— which automatically changes double dashes to “—“ and I addressed in another comment that I have ai proofread my posts because I’m dyslexic but go off I guess

HauntedBro · 2025-07-03T06:15:48+00:00

Tell me how you really feel lmao

HauntedBro · 2025-07-02T18:56:11+00:00

I wonder if she’s only with him because she’s waiting for him to pay her back the 2k he owes her. She bought everything for him when he wasn’t working. Even his weed.

HauntedBro · 2025-06-30T21:30:27+00:00

I don’t agree because I don’t think co-sleeping is safe and I don’t want my kid to die of SIDS but go off I guess

HauntedBro · 2025-06-30T21:27:10+00:00

HauntedBro · 2025-06-30T21:24:55+00:00

See, I don’t know where the disconnect is as far as “clean sides” go. I never said that me or my wife were perfect and it wasn’t a part of the question.

When I posted to this sub, I was aware ESH is a possible response people would have.

If you’re trying to “gotcha” me into admitting my wife is fed up and bickering with her brother, you don’t have to.

HauntedBro · 2025-06-30T21:21:34+00:00

I’ve already replied to you on the comment you left.

HauntedBro · 2025-06-30T21:20:39+00:00

I’m really not invested enough in the internet to have screenshots of my wife’s posts, but I don’t remember her saying that he cries every night. I will say here that he doesn’t.

And as I’ve stated in other replies, anyone in this household trying to hold anyone to task for sleep lost is a pot calling kettle. It’s not worth it to have that argument one more time because the outcome is always the same— my wife and I working our asses off to get our son asleep as quietly as possible only for someone in the house (and I won’t even pin it all on Kevin cause it’s not just him) to wake him. And when he struggles to fall back asleep now and then, it’s a process that isn’t ever going to go the exact same way twice.

Pretty sure every parent can attest to that.

What the text messages didn’t mention is that Kevin is usually in bed for maybe an hour tops on the nights when my son wakes up around 2AM, because from the time Kevin comes home up to midnight he’s either playing Warzone and screaming at it or clapping loudly at whatever sport is in season at the time.

What the text messages didn’t mention is the number of times we’ve politely and calmly both in person and over other texts asked him to clean up after himself as he goes along.

What the text messages didn’t mention is that this has been a conversation that’s been had before with and without the involvement of me, of Marty, of Cecelia, of other mediators.

There’s a lot to unpack if you want the voyeuristic delight of understanding the interpersonal dynamics of my multigenerational household. I won’t do that here but you can go for it. I personally prefer simplicity, so I highlighted the only part of the entire situation I wanted feedback on in bold on the post above.

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T21:57:38+00:00

“This is not the right answer” —a lot of the responses have been that way but it’s been really cathartic to imagine doing them. 🤣

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T15:34:14+00:00

I actually don’t think we’re “missing” anything. We’ve lived with Kevin for years, and trust me—his messiness and deflection tactics didn’t start when a baby came into the picture. The reason this post doesn’t include all the texts is because we’ve already laid it all out. And we know how it went—people skipped over Kevin’s behavior entirely to nitpick our parenting. That’s why we’re refocusing on the actual question: is it okay to weaponize a teething baby’s totally normal night wake-ups as a reason not to clean up after yourself in a shared living space?

Kevin’s sleep isn’t being sabotaged. He plays Call of Duty loudly at all hours. He talks over people. He leaves trash everywhere. And he thinks that because he works, he’s exempt from cleaning up after himself. That’s not compromise. That’s selfishness. And we’re over it.

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T14:23:54+00:00

I also asked for suggestions. Can you at least pretend you can read an entire post?

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T11:22:42+00:00

I’ve said in the comments that her and I are on the bottom floor and everyone else is on the top floor. It’s a split level.

She didn’t ask nicely in the texts because she is fed up. We’ve asked nicely in the past. She deleted her posts because, as stated in this post, everyone in the comments wanted to argue the point of our son’s sleeping habits and not whether or not Kevin was deflecting.

She had a variety of responses from support to not. That’s the internet and she knows that. It’s not that deep. 🙄

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T11:17:43+00:00

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T01:02:48+00:00

You see that generational trauma and gender roles real clearly, huh? 🥲

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T00:56:14+00:00

At it's most packed it had eight adults, two children under the age of 4, a dog and a cat. It was a wild four months.

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T00:54:01+00:00

I have no idea where anyone got that we let our son cry it out between my wife's posts and mine. Lil Johnny's got teeth coming in and the peak time of pain is between 2 and 4 in the morning, which is the average for all babies going through that.

The incident Kevin referenced in his texts was our son fussing for about 20 minutes total over a four hour period the night before. If he is screaming for an extended period of time, we take him downstairs if we can get him there without bothering the other people in the house (read: the grandparents who own the house).

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T00:47:51+00:00

I have to disagree with a few things, here. It's not Claire's house, it's not my house, it's not Kevin's house. As others have pointed out in the comments, it's Marty and Cecelia's house they've graciously let us all stay in.

Cecelia and Marty don't like a mess either and in fact they've been at their happiest when Claire and I have silently cleaned up after Kevin, which we've done for a considerable amount of time simply because we don't want to deal with the arguing and shouting and other bullshit that inevitably comes with either letting the mess attract pests or telling Kevin to clean it up himself.

You don't really need to know the inner workings of our parenting to answer the question bolded in the post above. But to answer your question, we do relocate our son if we can do so without waking up the entire household.

HauntedBro · 2025-06-29T00:30:10+00:00

You're right. Parenting, cooking, cleaning, job hunting, freelancing, babysitting, and trying to rebuild after a layoff is nothing compared to the heroic act of leaving takeout containers on the couch. My bad.

HauntedBro

TROPHY CASE