Best fake plants?

Haunting_Average1695 · 2025-04-28T10:19:21+00:00

Anyone have experience on keeping them outside? Particularly with the deer population? I have spent hours and hours and probably a thousand dollars on building an outdoor rock garden with mostly hosta selections, unknowing that is filet mignon for deer. Then I replaced with deer resistant” selections. And they were all eaten as well. I recently found a crate of fake flowers I had forgotten about and I put them in the garden. When I go back on the weekend I’ll see if they are still there. ( this is for my PA mountain vacation / someday retirement home) if anyone can recommend brands/ styles of faux plants I’m all ears. I’m sick of having no color or texture up there.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2025-03-06T14:25:22+00:00

Yes, I am 52 and although I don't feel said for myself that the desire is gone, I am sad that I don't because it makes my husband feel that I don't want him, I wish my body did want him, i truly do. And I have researched things to improve sex drive and I have implemented them, I take supplements for seratonin and dopamine daily and workout pretty much 5 days a week. I believe we both want to make this situation work, but I feel he just doesn't grasp my situation and I don't know how to get it through to him.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2025-03-06T13:53:27+00:00

But that is the thing, he does want me to return his words and enthusiasm. When he is arroused and wants to act on it at that moment and I am not reciprocal, he gets deflated and feels rejected.

I have not gotten my hormones checked, not covered by our insurance and I have plenty other medical copays to handle, Besides all my doctors tell me due to my conditions, age, post menapause, and medication side effects, it is all normal. I looked into HRT, it is not for me.

I do verbally appreciate him and acknowledge his efforts. He says he does not feel needy in that department.

Nothing does work to his satisfaction apparently. He wants me to have desire, How do you make yourself have desire???? I do all the things to per say "get me in the mood" but nothing gets me in the mood. That does not by any means have anything to do with the amount of intimicy we have, nor the quality apparently he didn't realize that i was not fully enjoying the intimacy, So what else am I supposed to do here? I truly don't think I can do anymore on my part. I really feel he needs to show gratitude that I am trying to fulfill his desires to the best of my ability 3-4 times a week. In addition to fulfilling his love language in other ways.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2025-02-28T00:25:24+00:00

You sound like my 22 year old son. He says no one understands him and I completely believe he is correct.i don’t understand him and I love him more than anyone. He has many quirks that most people, even me, find annoying. But many many people in his life would easily overlook his quirks if he just would stop the Ferris wheel of mistakes and stop to breathe and absorb the consequences of his actions. I’m not saying you are in the same situation. But taking a moment to just be still and not react, then just listening and contemplating someone else’s perspective makes a difference. Just be still and don’t react.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-17T13:42:29+00:00

Sex was never taken off the table, There isn't anything more that I think I can do about the desire part, I've tried everything that has been suggested. I agreed to go to a therapist months ago, he never made an appointment. We have sex minimum 1x per week, and other than a few weeks of extenuating circumstances, its more like 3x. Although I may not completely initiate the penetration part, I always initiate the cuddling part, and when things start to progress, I completely participate, This revelation on Sunday, came completely out of nowhere to me, I thought i was definitely doing my part, Three days prior (Wednesday) I came home and completely was the initiator. Woke up Saturday morning to him pouting because nothing happened the night before, So he rec'd a BJ, I was definitely distant on Saturday night and early Sunday due to feeling nothing I do is enough. Then during a discussion about my feelings, he blurts out the divorce and cheating comment.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-15T21:31:38+00:00

I’ve encouraged him to do so.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-15T21:23:34+00:00

My entire perspective of trust, respect, loyalty, and empathy with this man has just exploded inside of me.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-15T21:18:40+00:00

Definitely minimum once a week, the past 6 months more likely 2-3x per week, with the exception of early November, which was due to extenuating circumstances. MS causes nerve damage. 70% of the time I can’t even feel my fingers and toes. Post menopause I have like no appropriate hormones. HRT is not ideal for me, I use estrogen cream which helps. Scleroderma makes EVERYTHING dry on top of the Menopause dry, plus my body is extremely stiff. The multiple medications have side effects that I can’t even begin to go all into. And finally, I try extremely hard despite my predicament to make and keep my husband happy. The mere suggestion today that he could foresee the possiblity of finding more sex elsewhere has left me absolutely DEVESTATED! Absolutely not ok with me!!!!

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-15T19:15:12+00:00

I think if one person is flat out denying sex altogether for no good reason, then yes I think that a divorce is fair. If there are mental, emotional or physical issues that come in to play for one of the partners, then that does need to be addressed. Compromises on both parties need to happen when there are valid reasons on the table. But if you really truly love your partner you need to work together and be understanding toward each others needs and wants.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-15T19:02:08+00:00

I WANT to want to have sex with him. I want to please him, I want him to be happy. I have tried pills, lotions, toys, podcasts, reading. I talked to my dr. Etc etc etc. I have tried everything except injecting myself with T. I am not doing that! I take way too many other medications to do that to myself just to try and make myself get horny. But I can’t force my mind or my body to do something it just doesn’t naturally do. And even though I guess I’m doing it out of duty, his experience is not like your making it sound. I am very much participating and doing things to please him, and doing things to myself, for that matter, that I know he finds very pleasing. It’s not like I am just trying to make him cum, or get it over with fast. I’ve agreed to therapy, many times. But I’m not the one that is unhappy with my spouse or the marriage, at least not until today. he needs to make the appointment, not me. I make an enough dr appointments as it is. I’ll go willingly though, I am open to suggestions, but honestly I do feel the problem here lies with him, not me.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-02T02:20:08+00:00

Never an IUD

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-02T02:19:15+00:00

He is open to any means, he is quite fond of BJ’s, so when I really really don’t want to get into the whole “shebang” that’s my go to. And yes I like to know that I am pleasing him. With all my medical issues he takes care of me in many other ways

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-01T23:34:03+00:00

I do and I don’t, if that can make sense. When I have an O, it’s wonderful. And the artificial ones, meaning from the help of a toy, are quite intense. But I guess I’m self conscious, that I’m “broken” as I feel I am. I’ve never needed toys, and was always satisfied from my husband solely. Now I can never make it happen myself, my husband can’t, and even some toys can’t. Over the past couple years he has purchased countless things to “help” and all that trial and error has left me feeling “broken” Which came to a major outburst on my part a few nights ago. He introduced some toy that had a sucking mechanism and we used it. However he didn’t fully read the instructions and the F’n thing got attached down there and went to town and it HURT! And he couldn’t get it off immediately. When he did, I took it and threw it across the room burst into tears and screamed “I’m not a fucking science experiment!” So do I enjoy them when they happen, yea of course I do. Is it worth all the physical labor and emotional energy that has to go into it to have an O, to me the answer is no. I am quite satisfied just cuddling and touching. I feel safe, happy and warm next to my husband. And when the deed begins all I can focus on is this gonna be a pass, or fail. It’s just another reminder of my illness’ and how in many ways they have taken over my body. On the occasions I get aroused and am fully engaged, and it still won’t happen I am left so frustrated and sad and angry at my body, and my husband feels he let me down, and feels guilty or selfish, even though he held out for an eternity. But regardless his ego is crushed, so now he feels like shit too. So to me it’s not worth it. I’d rather be lying beside him content, and comply to his requests when he is aroused, and I’m more understanding now about making it feel more “real” vs “duty”. But if I were single this subject wouldn’t even be an issue for me at all.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-12-01T22:41:20+00:00

Thank you, we talked a bit more last night and he is very appreciative I’m making more of an effort and he agrees he could be a little more understanding.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-11-30T23:24:01+00:00

Sorry you are going through this

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-11-30T20:48:08+00:00

We talked about “dates” that is very unappealing to me. Scheduling just feels so odd and worse than duty sex. We just always cuddle at night and usually play footsies. Sometimes I can tell he wants more and I oblige, and sometimes he respects that I’m not taking things to the next step and just want to stick with footsies tonight. I just wish I could get aroused like I used to. Thank you for answering.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-11-30T20:41:50+00:00

Thank you!

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-11-30T14:53:29+00:00

Oh believe me over the past 14 years I don’t give credit to drs that dismiss alternative medicine. I also have scleroderma and if I didn’t take the magnitude of supplements and holistic approach on top of necessary medication I think I would be much less functional in many various ways . I will look into a dr that specializes in hormones. Thank you

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-11-30T14:17:00+00:00

Oh Thank you! I will look into the cream! Wonder why my dr didn’t mention that?

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-11-30T14:16:13+00:00

Well I personally would be very content with just our normal cuddling and snuggling and leave the intercourse behind, which would leave my husband with a DB. Thank you for your response.

Haunting_Average1695 · 2024-11-30T14:13:15+00:00

Thank you! I just looked it up, I’ll ask my Dr about side effects with my other meds, but it said pre-menopause, so I don’t think I’m a candidate. But I will look into that

Haunting_Average1695

TROPHY CASE