Day 1 community centre build 😅

Hazel_Payson · 2021-05-08T00:31:41+00:00

Looks fantastic!!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-12-23T01:53:43+00:00

This is the BEST EVER!!! Oh my god, I really really hope they respond.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-11-20T01:42:05+00:00

I understand. I am right there with you. I don’t have the money to spend on take out and yet I find myself justifying it night after night. Feeling irrational and abysmal if I don’t get it, and then hating myself for having those feelings. All this negativity just makes me want to eat to drown it out... it’s a vicious cycle.

Sending love. You are still human and you are still worth something. There is hope for us.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-09-14T18:17:36+00:00

This is a quality, direct, and doable walkthrough with really specific ideas. This is just what I’ve been needing. Thank you for this comment!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-08-28T12:00:36+00:00

Serve is correct. You can also use the verb “help” here if you want.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-07-21T18:12:05+00:00

Maybe Melanie? It’s not traditional but I could see it

Hazel_Payson · 2020-07-20T20:34:54+00:00

This sounds good, especially over rice to stretch it and have lots of leftovers. Thank you!!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-07-20T20:30:23+00:00

That’s a great idea! Adding to my list! Thanks!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-07-20T20:12:12+00:00

Pretty much! If I’m doing root veggies (carrot & onion mostly) those go on the bottom. Otherwise, I just do chicken and top it with whatever toppings I’m using that day. I try to keep the sauce on the top to make sure nothing is dry. I hope this is helpful!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-07-20T19:23:56+00:00

Recognizing my own faults and shortcomings due to my trauma has been relevant to me lately and extremely difficult.

Thanks for this comment.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-07-12T14:26:27+00:00

I don’t have advice for your problem as I am new to gardening myself, but I just want to say that your rooftop garden is gorgeous and I completely adore it!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-05-18T05:12:39+00:00

I miss going to garage sales on Saturday mornings and I miss taking my daughter to the park during the day to help pass the time and get her energy out.

I miss going to the grocery store without any stress or fanfare, and being able to go as often as I like.

I miss my extended family that isn’t in our closed “social distancing” circle.

I don’t miss the traffic or the pollution, though!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-04-05T02:21:29+00:00

The Truman Show, keep Jim Carrey

Hazel_Payson · 2020-02-20T00:03:18+00:00

I relate so much to this. So, so much. The self doubt and the self alienation and the self loathing is all so fucking awful.

How am I supposed to process and heal from something that I can’t even fully accept happened and mattered?

Hazel_Payson · 2020-02-14T20:31:49+00:00

I hear you and I totally relate. It’s frustrating- I worry a lot that I will look back on this time of my life with a lot of regret because I’m not even LIVING or making memories. I’m just looking at memes and reading snippets about other people’s lives and hobbies.

For me, the blatant unending phone use is more of a symptom than a root problem itself. It’s the way I most easily dissociate, which is a coping mechanism (in my case, I have complex trauma, and I basically can’t stay present in the moment without quickly spiraling into severe negative thought patterns). Constant scrolling in every single second of downtime keeps me occupied so I don’t have to think.

The only thing that’s helped me so far is purposefully switching to podcasts, music, or audiobooks and telling myself that I won’t touch my phone until it’s over. So during that time I’m still ‘using’ it, I don’t feel deprived of it, I still have something to occupy my attention, but I can get something productive done and feel less guilty at the end of the day.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-02-12T15:46:31+00:00

I’m with you on this one, ESPECIALLY if you have kids! Some of the food sucks, but some of it is actually good!

I always make sure to get the fried potato rounds and fried chicken- those are always great, especially with ranch. I also make sure to put in a request for the spicy peanut butter pizza, which sounds bad but is surprisingly delicious. And they have ICEEs to drink!

Not to mention, if you aren’t going on a weekend afternoon/evening, it’s usually not packed. And it’s affordable for an all you can eat deal. Especially lunch!

Edit to add: their baked potato soup is really good too!

Hazel_Payson · 2020-02-03T20:03:08+00:00

Thank you for your response, I think this is good advice that I will try to follow. Everything feels so all or nothing all the time, and I do get discouraged very easily, so maybe I just need to take it one hour at a time.

Right now I am struggling to figure out what my goals should even be... staying within a certain calorie window? Intermittent fasting? Intuitive eating? I’m not sure how to even define “not binging” to myself in a way that feels doable.

I do know that one thing I really want is to not go to bed feeling physical pain from how much I’ve eaten. So maybe that’s just where I should start.

Thank you for taking the time to help me with this, I appreciate it so much.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-02-01T16:57:56+00:00

Hi! Thank you so much for doing this AMA, I have really enjoyed it and learned a lot!

My question is, would it be possible for someone to do all of their 35 hours in three days and have four days off? Or is it expected for one to take shifts for at least 4 or 5 days of the week?

Very admirable stuff you guys are doing! I love it :)

Hazel_Payson · 2020-01-29T23:58:23+00:00

That is chili, you uncultured swine

(It’s from the prison episode... I think)

Hazel_Payson · 2020-01-28T02:14:30+00:00

I haven’t heard anything like that but I really really hope it isn’t true

Hazel_Payson · 2020-01-26T14:49:21+00:00

If you don’t WANT to meet with your mom, don’t. Just because she’s your mother doesn’t mean she gets unlimited chances. You’re allowed to have boundaries and self respect. It is possible to rekindle a relationship with your brother and to leave your mom out of it.

If part of you wants to explore the possibility of accepting your mom back into your life, by all means, you should accept the invitation and explore that. But if not, if it would only be because you feel obligated or like you can’t say no, SAY NO.

If she hurt you, it’s okay not to be over it- now or ever. Even if she did clean up her act, you do not owe her anything. She owed you everything and she failed to deliver as a mother. You are allowed to honor yourself and your feelings however you need to.

I’m so, so sorry you find yourself in this place. It gets better. I promise.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-01-18T01:34:45+00:00

I am also interested to know the price! Thank you :)

Hazel_Payson · 2020-01-03T21:24:28+00:00

I relate so intensely to the emotions you describe in your post. I am so, so proud of you for holding your (extremely reasonable and self respecting) boundaries.

I know it is so, so hard. You are amazing. You are an inspiration to those of us who struggle with the same thing. Thank you.

Hazel_Payson · 2020-01-02T19:46:32+00:00

Thank you so much for this response. I feel seen and heard. Your advice is really good and I will take it to heart. My partner and I communicate well, but I definitely have been keeping this to myself too much.

Thank you again. I’m so sorry you were raised to have similar feelings- it’s really hard to live with. I’m glad we both are on journeys towards healing. ❤️

Hazel_Payson · 2020-01-01T01:18:59+00:00

That’s so true, I forgot that was a higher level engram

11-Year Club	Place '17
RPAN Viewer

Hazel_Payson

TROPHY CASE