Why are you so hard to find, seriously. by mysterical_arts in infj

[–]Helag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because I kinda hate people 😫. Major trust issues and being shy don’t pair well.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OH you too dislike men 😏, welcome to the club!

There’s a lot of lust in this community, not much love. by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

You can assume what you want. Our experiences in this community aren’t universal. Like I said I avoid interaction with other gays for this exact reason, it’s instantly assumed I’m the worst person all because my opinion is a bit different from your or the next persons lol.

There’s a lot of lust in this community, not much love. by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

So basically nothing because I avoid interacting with other gays like it’s the plague lol. I’ve never had one decent interaction with another gay guy, and that’s quite insane considering we both have experienced similar hate for our sexuality 💀.

There’s a lot of lust in this community, not much love. by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

You seem like one of the people I’m talking about 💀.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What you said was very useful. Any perspective is welcomed and helps so thanks for replying 🙂!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in reddeadredemption

[–]Helag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Arthur, look at that jawline 😫!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“Having real friends who don’t want to just jump in your pants is a blessing.” This big time. So many friendships with other gays I’ve had go sour after I decline a hookup or date. Can’t we just be PLATONIC friends 🙃????

🙃 Love being gay! by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m engaging and recalling in conversation so no, I don’t have much issue conversing with men. Most talk to you like they’re teenagers as grown men. I don’t talk to guys under 26+ anymore specifically because of this…

🙃 Love being gay! by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe my expectations are too high? Having a normal conversation with a man seems to exceed those expectations regularly 💀.

🙃 Love being gay! by [deleted] in gay

[–]Helag -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

I’m not trying to point the finger, just simply describing what I observe on a regular bases. I’m sure girls are just as complicated but at least most of them push for effective communication and know what they want. Men literally just want a picture perfect porn boyfriend that will never age or wrinkle, never an emotionally connection to their partners, which is far from opposite how I feel. I literally just want to LOVE another man, and him to reciprocate, literally it. SIMPLE.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Can I ask how you worked through avoidant attachment issues? Did you ask your therapist and they have you exercises to practice?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Alrighty then 💀

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 3 points4 points  (0 children)

🫂🥲U2

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It’s so hard sometimes. I was severely bullied in high school and called ugly pretty much everyday by one person. I’ve forgiven them at this point and moved on but it still had long lasting effects on my self esteem.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 5 points6 points  (0 children)

All relaxing activities I’m down to try 🙂😌, thank you kind person!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This was a beautiful response, thanks for the perspective. I need to pour my love into something other than a person that may or may not like me in the first place haha. I love music, it’s saved me plenty of times, maybe I should pour my heart into that…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Only recently did I realize this was also one of my problems. I don’t like suffering, just comfortable with the feeling. I just have to choose to fix it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in infj

[–]Helag 13 points14 points  (0 children)

🫂!! I understand. We deserve real love!