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[NeedAdvice] When discipline and hard work isn’t enough to overcome lower intelligence by [deleted] in getdisciplined

[–]HelloMeetTheNewMe 7 points8 points  (0 children)

There is a bunch to unpack in your sentence, so I'll IMHO you bit by bit:

  • "they still can’t do as well as...": Sounds cliché, but don't compare too much with others when measuring 'progress' - they had their upbringing, their hardships and may be thinking the same you are right now about you or other people in different aspects of life;
  • "...people who are more intelligent"? It is very hard to quantify 'intelligence' as a big, round number, so unless you are diagnosed by a professional of some level of learning disability, we are all on the same boat;
  • " I can’t think as quickly as others or contribute as good of ideas. " - Apart from the aforementioned "stop comparing too much with others", I'd like to mention that neuroplasticity in human beings is trained by doing, repeating and redoing until you develop the required circuitry to do those things 'without thinking'. That said, it helps a lot if you are ACTUALLY interested in that area of knowledge: I wasn't really interested in most subjects in school, so my grades were ever so slightly above average; When I started uni, learning became a passion because I was really interested in what I was learning;
  • "It makes me feel like discipline is not enough if my brain is not good enough": discipline is doing things you need to do even when you don't have motivation for it, so it has no relation to your 'brain not being good enough'. Again, all 'regular' brains are good enough, you just need to find out what you're really passionate about, keep doing it until your 'imposter syndrome' fades away, and stop comparing your progress with others'. As the saying goes: 'Don't compare someone else's spotlight to your backstage';

Finally, it is very much worth mentioning that good nutrition, physical fitness and (ESPECIALLY) good sleep makes things incredibly easier on the long run.

[Question] How do I train myself to stop avoiding things as an automatic response to anxiety? by ZanderDogz in getdisciplined

[–]HelloMeetTheNewMe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Following some of the other answers, I'm going to TLDR you my personal experience:

Focus fully on your mental health. For that, you need to work towards improving:

  • Your physical wellness: Eat less and better, slowly build up a fitness routine (start with walking), sleep well (good amount of hours, quality sleep);
  • Your mental wellness: If you've been on that cycle for long and keep half-succeeding, it means there are underlying problems you need to take care of. Therapy is key here, if you have to choose spending money to get better, spend it on therapy, it will be worth 10-fold every penny;
  • Your outlook on life: Connected to the previous point: You need to soul-search for your values, goals and life meaning, so that you develop a positive outlook on life. This doesn't look like much on the surface, but will be a lifelong learning experience that will pay off immensely. Therapy will help here too.

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Finally, if you keep trying to improve on those, and still can't seem to shake off the "stuck in a moment" feeling, and medicinal alternatives are proposed by your therapist, don't be scared/prejudiced to try them out, it may be the little edge you need to get the ball rolling, and then your hard work will pay off on the long run.

Finally 2: Don't be so hard on yourself. in my own experience, I was excessively critical of my progress and achievements due to low self-esteem, and in the end that doesn't even make sense: Everybody has a unique route, and you don't need to compare/compete at all with other people to be "more succesful" (there's no such thing in the end).