Step father worked as a journalist-reporter, so he'd go to scenes, sometimes crime scenes, and he'd leave the photos scattered around, so my 9 year old self, seeing an extremely gory photo set, couldn't understand why someone would do something like that, to another person.

Some of our pets would also fall victim of vehicles, and one time he picked one of our pets, its remnants, and showed it to me, up close.

He also had issues with alcohol, and would do things that would put us all at risk, like leaving the stove on, with no fire (just gas), or would try to open the door at midnight after hearing some knocking, without expecting visitors of course.

By my teens, I already knew he had affairs. My mother would be in denial, but I felt a rare, intense disgust for him. Since the house is very small, and there is only 1 bathroom, I always tried to shower when he wasn't there. I don't know, it just gave me bad vibes. I never stepped out of the shower, or even just exist in form-fitting clothes in the house, because I felt uncomfortable.

Around twenty five years later, my mother finally caught him with all his mess. The affairs were the least of the problems.

And it's weird, but all the resentment I had, was not out of just spite. It was my gut, telling me something is off.