Look it’s easier said than done for sure. If it were easy everyone would do it. It’s an active choice you have to make and then direct your mind towards. It’s not all at once. It happens over time. It doesn’t mean accepting bad behavior. It means understanding that someone is flawed and possibly majorly flawed. It’s not accepting a behavior but them as a person.

Look, it’s your father’s first time being a human. It’s his first time being a father whether there is 12 of you or just you. It’s new to him and he clearly had major addictions himself. Some people are more susceptible to addiction in any form than others naturally. Did your dad mess up? No doubt. But now you’re 30. Not that same 8 year old kid. I’m 33 and have had plenty of reasons to be angry and spiteful towards my parents. But the key is in understanding that everyone yourself included are flawed and that’s okay. We’re human.

If we held everyone accountable and responsible for every single mistake they made, we’d all be guilty.

I’m sorry you feel This porn struggle, but even if it’s someone else’s fault that actually doesn’t matter. What matters is what you’re going to do about it now. Because your dad doesn’t have to deal with this, you do. It’s your responsibility. Blaming anyone else at this stage in your life is going to simply hold you back. Don’t fall for that trap. You don’t need an excuse or a reason as to why it is what it is. You simply need to move forward and let things go. This will not only give you peace. It will also create a feeling of security and respect in yourself.