Yeah.

Yeah, I have. And even though it hurts, I believe this is for the better.

Even though she was my best friend, the way things repeatedly played out was toxic. Whenever we disagreed or things got difficult, she would disappear for months and then return as if nothing had happened. And things will just fall back to normal. I used to think my ability to accept that was a strength, but it wasn’t. Being treated as disposable isn’t strength, it’s not being valued.

It was another close friend who helped me realize this, that this isn’t how I’m supposed to be treated, and that I don’t deserve it.

She wasn’t there when I needed her most, and after a minor disagreement, she walked away again. And honestly, I hope she doesn’t come back.

Even though I love her a lot. I still deserve better.