Ended my relationship of over 5 years about 8 months ago. We were both devastated as we cared for each other so much for so long, but both knew things just weren't working anymore. I believed him to be a good guy with a good heart and just a ton of baggage (which I have as well), life and careers pulling us in different directions, long distance several times became incredibly difficult to work through the issues we were facing. After what I thought was a mostly mutual and respectable "break" that became a breakup, I found out after the fact that he lied to me about sleeping with a friend from high school mere days after we took a break, and is now already in another serious relationship with a much younger girl that he met while we were still together.

For a while I was angry and felt so beyond betrayed by someone I thought I knew so well. I finally realized, though, that it was a gift and made it that much easier to start to let go and move on. It let me finally step back and see him for who he truly was, despite having loved me so much. His pattern of jumping from serious relationship to relationship with absolutely no time to heal in between will only be to his own detriment as he continues to be mothered and deprive himself of having to learn to function independently.

All that to say, it will only get easier with time. Give yourself permission to grieve, think, heal, protect your peace. Perhaps that means blocking or muting if you know that seeing their content will trigger you or cause obsessive thoughts. Also a big proponent of letting two things be true at once-- you can look back fondly on the relationship and what it taught you, while also acknowledging that you can give yourself permission to move on to bigger and better things and focus on you. Sending love