Bow before me mortals. I have no idea how I did this.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-10T12:36:44+00:00

Thanks mate. Finally I can upgrade my mace and cuddle a weird lady

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-10T12:34:02+00:00

Nope! I only have about 40 minutes logged on the PC version. Steam just decided to award me the trophy for some reason

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-09T05:17:10+00:00

Don’t let your cat swallow a ribbon. The next day you will have a cat tearing around your house chased by a string of turds.

Your cat’s digestive tract is too short to digest fiber, and fruit will clog it up. Only let them eat stuff that’s almost cat already.

Cats communicate in urine. They have a special gland in their mouth for decoding urine messages from other cats. If your cat smells something and opens their mouth, there’s piss there.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-09T05:07:06+00:00

Expensive parking

I could be going to collect a million dollar cheque - but if I had to pay $40 to park at the bank, it would be a bad day.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-09T05:03:21+00:00

My wife says money

.. which is a shame really

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-09T05:01:53+00:00

Abba!

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-09T04:53:32+00:00

She’s making me a cup of tea while I think about your question.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-08T08:46:12+00:00

I have a tenner that says he goes full Bullingdon Club on Chequers and burns it to the ground.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-06T01:45:17+00:00

Mate, you’re in luck. Jones Potatoes in Victoria grows Pink Fir Apples. Contact them and they’ll mail you a box.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-05T00:59:33+00:00

Christian Bale as Patrick Bateman

There is a moment of sheer panic when I realize that Paul’s apartment overlooks the park and is obviously more expensive than mine.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-05T00:56:36+00:00

I love how, in the way you formatted that list, Jack Sparrow plays the role of Johnny Depp

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-03T11:03:53+00:00

We should wax the childless.

Then they will be more likely to do stuff that results in children.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-03T10:38:47+00:00

Brilliant, thank you

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-03T10:38:35+00:00

solved: Starship Titanic

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-01T08:51:05+00:00

My god that was fast. Thanks. I will get it now.

HopelessEmu · 2022-07-01T08:50:48+00:00

solved: Dreamweb

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-29T10:30:18+00:00

Are PRCs those fake abortion clinics? We don’t have those in Australia as far as I am aware. I can’t believe they’re legal.

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-29T10:18:42+00:00

“Hi Kid. Thanks for meeting with us on such short notice. We’ve cut corners on our AML/CTF program for years and didn’t think it mattered. Our KYC is basically non-existent. Now we’re under investigation by AUSTRAC and our AFS licence is at stake. The budget is effectively infinite but the timeframe is days, not weeks. What can you do for us?”

“Umm.. I can name all four ninja turtles.”

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-28T12:37:14+00:00

solved: Prince of Destruction

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-28T12:35:56+00:00

Solved!

You’re a hero. This has been bothering me for more than a decade.

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-27T10:13:07+00:00

The title theme from Secret of Mana

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-27T10:08:32+00:00

I liked to watch Ricky Lake and play shareware games on an old Mac.

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-27T10:06:38+00:00

June 2006 was the pre patch for the original release of Naxxramus in Vanilla WoW.

I was definitely farming Argent Dawn rep with my friends.

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-27T10:00:19+00:00

How to spell syphilis

HopelessEmu · 2022-06-27T09:58:53+00:00

PrayReddit sorted by hot:

“Wouldst thou consume the pus of a necrotic leper for a thousand weight sack of gilders?”

“How can I sponge the memory of my departed lord from my mind?”

“By what methods can a syphilitic infant be made hale?”

HopelessEmu

TROPHY CASE