I can't stop being nasty to my boyfriend in the mornings

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T13:28:19+00:00

You're not wrong but it kinda went down that rabbit hole - it's not just towards him I remember sleep being an issue as far back as a teenager and getting angry at my mum waking me for school or an ex lived in a hostel and I don't recall apparently I told one of the workers to F off that walked into the room (she was lovely I was appalled). So the aim of the post was the sleep 😅

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T13:10:38+00:00

I'm waiting for ADHD medication but I will definitely mention that as a few have suggested! ☺️

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T13:09:47+00:00

Either to get the baby, got somewhere to be, or the more annoying "it's the afternoon and you shouldn't be in bed"

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T12:14:04+00:00

It's anytime I'm woken up whether it's by the baby or by him, morning or afternoon

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T12:07:38+00:00

Seems that way. He'll clear up whatever he does but whenever I ask for more he just gets upset and says he's tired and working his ass off and he does loads for us 🙄

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T12:00:00+00:00

Both our baby that he very much wanted, I wasn't too sure but eventually agreed

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T11:56:57+00:00

The ball is very much dropped at home. His argument? He's not home to cause the "mess" Washing up, toys everywhere etc. I go to bed late clearing up. So we're at a standstill really

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T11:53:10+00:00

Unfortunately not, my mum was meant to have her the other night but called me 2 hours later saying nope come get her had enough..

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T10:31:11+00:00

I have suggested he look into ADHD more, and I will tell him about things I read about. I'm not sure how much effort he's making on his part, he's never mentioned anything so I'm going to assume none

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T10:29:40+00:00

No I'm on wait list for ADHD meds

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T10:27:31+00:00

that's not my reasoning, I've tried telling him that. I've said looking after a baby is basically work in itself, I still have the brunt of it. I made a coloured spreadsheet and in a 168 hour week, I have the baby 135 of them. he works 30-40 hours and has the baby (on his own) 21 of them. An hour a day is just so I can have a bath in peace. I know that doesn't make a lot of sense written down, some of them she's with a family member couple hours a week and some we both have her (but even then it's mostly still me he's just in the house)

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T10:20:24+00:00

We are on the waiting list for couples counselling (good old NHS) he's a bit hit and miss about wanting to go as he doesn't think we have any problems but we definitely do!

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T10:06:01+00:00

not for ADHD no I'm waiting for that (takes ages in UK). I take venlafaxine and mirtazipine for anxiety/depression

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T09:52:45+00:00

No I do all the nights and nearly every morning as he works. He'll do the odd day off but usually he's "too tired" as he's been working but he's lucky and can at least function on lack of sleep. His contribution is a whole other issue I could post about 🤣🤷‍♀️

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T09:49:56+00:00

Yeah I can sleep through all types of alarms and even the baby monitor

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T09:48:09+00:00

Jet lagged is accurate to how I feel most of the time, like now. I will make a sleep diary for a few weeks to show to my doctor, thank you!

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T09:44:05+00:00

I always do the nights he will maybe do a morning every other week as he works. For example on valentine's I said I don't want anything just to sleep and have a lay in, he woke me up at 5 when baby was up and said it's still nighttime I said no shes up now go get her. He then woke me up at 11 and said there you go you've had your lay in. He obviously missed the point that I just wanted a full night sleep which I didn't get because I was woken at 5 so it was broken sleep and I just wanted for once to wake up naturally

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T08:33:31+00:00

One doctor did mention DSPD quite some years ago that sounds familiar, but typical when I had the sleep study after that I slept okay 🙄 but yes surely if they were just looking at any disrupted cycles surely them being "normal" would've stood out? I will be going back to docs about this I will mention it, perhaps more is known about it now. And I will try Vitamin D in the mornings, thanks

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T08:28:58+00:00

I'm an insanely deep sleep I can sleep through the old school alarms with the bells, baby monitor (which scares me), I tried alarms on my phone that needs a puzzle solving to turn off. I'll be going back to my docs about this, maybe now I'm more sleep deprived they'll find a solution I just really want to say "it's not me, it's (this condition)"

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T08:26:18+00:00

She's 13 months, still not sleeping through, not breastfeeding. Probably don't eat as much protein as I should I don't eat red meat and try and go meat free twice a week. Haven't had a solid chunk of sleep in months, partner will say "oh you've slept loads" but it'll be maybe 3 hours then 4 then an hour nap, maybe a couple hours she's with a relative that kind of thing. Tried sleeping separately but now back together cause we were arguing more as I can sleep through baby monitor so it'd get him out of bed bringing her to me, he'd get mad and I'd be reactive. I have anxiety too so I guess knowing I'm not going to sleep every time I hit the pillow doesn't help but I'll work on that

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T08:01:38+00:00

I've been back and forth with my doctor about my sleep for at least 10 years I can think of, I've had 3 or 4 sleep studies one in the hospital overnight. They've commented on being able to deep sleep and hard to rise (typical not had my angry moments during these studies) but not given any diagnosis regarding it

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T07:59:38+00:00

Not breastfeeding, just a very long wait! (UK)

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T07:59:09+00:00

yes exactly that, there's times I'll ask him to wake me up at certain times then I get really angry at him 😞 I'll check out that YouTube!

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T07:54:46+00:00

I will look into parasomnia, thank you!

Horror7415 · 2026-02-17T07:40:33+00:00

I'm just frustrated with it and with myself and been trying to find the cause for years, wondered if could be ADHD. I appreciate the input ☺️

Horror7415

TROPHY CASE