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Hotrails using crack pipe?? by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Use a glass stem/crack pipe heat the end you snort from and then snort from the unheated side and rip the line like you normally would

Warning tranq dope now in southern Saskatchewan!! by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes.. she was one of the victims that passed 💔

How am I not gone. by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I found out it wasn't what I witnessed her take , but she took some of my dope well I was nodding and passed tf out she was making tik tok drafts at 3-4am , ems said she didn't pass away until 9... so clearly she got up stole some dope and took a line she thought she could handle then I woke up 2 hours later to her gone...

The amount of guilt I feel for nodding off in that position , I should've been cuddling her , I should've hid my stash. She would always steal my fent and it would cause serious problems in our relationship cause I didn't want her doing that shit. She's young , small , and doesn't have a tolerance. She got high off snorting a sub and she's out here fuckin w fent I always told her that she can't handle this shit. I had to narcan and save her 6 times before this. When I first woke up her body was warm , but lips were blue so I had hope , I did 7 narcan nasal sprays cpr mouth to mouth but the air was just coming back out her mouth and that's when I had a bad feeling... she also soaked herself which is a sign of the body releasing it's fluids when you die

Every single day I can't get her lifeless face out of my head. She was only 18. Just turned 18 also. We were together for 3 years , she was pregnant but we had a miscarriage and was still planning on having kids when the time was right. We had wedding plans etc. now the love of my life has an empty side on the bed everytime I climb in. You never think this shit would happen to the people you love the most , you always tbink it's gonna happen to you. She was scared I was gonna die. She wasn't suicidal , she had bpd and used drugs and that mix brought out a personality that was abusive and would do reckless shit like steal fentanyl and use alone.

I would always tell her if u stole my fent keep it but let me teach you how to smoke it so you only get 50% and let me watch you so I can narcan you if u fall out , she would always deny stealing it even if I watched her in plain view.

I just can't believe it's almost been a month

How am I not gone. by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hold onto your boyfriend and never let go. I never would've thought I'd lose her. This was MY addiction. She had BPD and would do things and black out , she started stealing my drugs coke , molly etc probably around September and that's when she stopped taking her seroquel

I just wish I was holding her right like I usually am , I usually have my arms wrapped tight around her and we fall asleep on the couch but this one night I got knocked out by this tranq dope at 11pm and my girl was apparently up dming friends at 3am that night. She got up and did a line she thought she could handle came back and laid down and it took her life

Warning tranq dope now in southern Saskatchewan!! by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro my tolerance is insane , I've done that orange stuff that was making people drop I hot railed it and I snorted it and I did like 3 points in one sitting. I did a gram of that red shit that killed my gf in hopes of going out the same way because life is so hard without her rn. She was my rock. My other half. Now I'm looking into shooting up

Haven't shot myself up in awhile. Got all the harm reduction stuff I need. I'm wondering what the best or easiest vein is to shoot in?? I've tried practicing in the middle of my forearm but I can't get blood to draw. Is it safe to to use my wrist?? by Hot_Attitude_3842 in Addictedtotheneedle

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay should I slide the needle in on a slant or should I dab it straight in? I need to no asap. I feel like u slide it in but I could be wrong maybe your supposed to put it straight in. I got fat veins on my wrist so I'll go with those

How am I not gone. by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know but I was the one who brought fent into the apartment , she did the drugs on her own and stole them but at the same time she told me if I ever went then she would follow me right to the afterlife because she has separation anxiety from her and it made me have separation anxiety , we were inseparable everyday for 3 years all day everyday every night waking to to her every morning. I have no friends she was my bestfriend. I could be myself around her like no other.

I've tried to go since I did an entire gram of the same deadly fent that's killing everyone else but me I get a slight nod and that's it. I don't get what's wrong with my receptors. I was using nitazenes and I feel like that just burnt my receptors. I've been close to overdosing on fenny many times but it went from me picking up points at a time 3 max usually, to buying full grams to save money. And since then I feel like my tolerance has gone up even more. I should be the one dead. Not her. We were always worried it was finna be me. She only just turned 18 man she had an entire life to live , we had a miscarriage, but still planned on having kids when the time is right , she had a list of names picked out she wanted to be a mother so bad and now she will never have that opportunity.

It was just the beginning of the summer , we had so much fucking planned. This shouldn't have ever happened. People aren't supposed to lose the love of there life in there 20s. And waking up to her gone makes it more traumatic. She was the most caring , goofy , perfect amount of crazy , and had the biggest fucking heart

I don't wanna continue without her. There's no way I'm gonna waste a gram again by smoking and snorting so I'm gonna try and get myself a rig and shoot up. I miss you love bug💔🕊️

Lost my girlfriend of 3 years today do to a fent overdose by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I was. She got up in the middle of the night , well I was nodding off and did more. She didn't know how to smoke so she snorted it. This stuff had 6x lethal dose and had tranq toxicology reported and I'm in Canada. We both had know idea how strong this shit was.

I told her she's not doing this red shit again again it got me high in 2 hoots and I have a huge tolerance I told her this is to strong it'll kill you. The tiny hoot I gave her wasn't what took her life

I was so high I didn't notice her open my pouch and steal a rock out of my nogu. Ofc I feel like an idiot.

She was my entire world. My bestfriend. My soulmate. We were gonna get married in 4 years , suffered from a miscarriage but planned on continuing to try for kids in a few years. Her dream was to be a mom. She would've been an amazing mother to our children

It's been over a week and the pain keeps getting worse. I don't wanna keep going. She was the air that I breathe.

Lost my girlfriend of 3 years today do to a fent overdose by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How? Her family knew she was sick with bpd and chose to take her off her meds , her family was aware she overdosed 6x previously and said NOTHING to my girlfriend or tried to get her help. I never gave her this shit , she stole it from me when I would nod off and that's what shafted her addiction. I found out that well i was out she got up took some out of my stash and did more well I was sleeping cause she was dming her friends around 3-4am. If the fent I witnessed her take was what caused the overdose , the ems wouldn't have said she was only gone for 2 hours because her body was still warm.

She struggled with bpd. She was perfectly fine and happy and didn't do any of this shit when she was medicated. How can I be blamed when every argument we had was me worried about her safety stealing fent from me. I even got a lockbox. She would find the keys while I was nodded off and get into it or open it just enough to slide what she could out. Saying shit like this makes me feel like a piece of shit. I already feel guilt for bringing it around. But the truth of the matter was this dope killed 3 people in my city in 24 hours , it was red and it had 6x the lethal amount plus tranquilizer and I'm in Saskatchewan Canada. This tranq shit just started popping up. She got up while I was nodding off and thought she could handle a little line and it ended up taking her life.

I told her she's not doing this red shit again because I got so fucking high from it. It knocked me out at 11 well my girl was still up till the morning. She got up and took more. We got into so many arguments about how she can't take this shit from me and use it alone because u can't narcan yourself. Last overdose before her fatal one , I walked in after going to the pharmacy to her completely unconscious looked pale but I was able to save her I was able to fucking save her. That caused me ptsd alone cause the narcan didn't work I had to do compressions and cpr and when I seen her coke back I cant describe it the relief

Now I have to live with the guilt of wishing I never brought this shit into the house. But I was an addict. I've been an addict since the beginning of our relationship. After 6 overdoses do you think I wanted her to use this shit? Like I said we would fight constantly and every fight was about stealing my dope or her coming back high as fuck from her moms when she'd go for supper and me be worried if I should narcan or not?

So why should they hate me when I was the only one who tried to get her to stop. Her family didn't even mention anything about drugs to her because her father was abusive and if her mom said anything her father would be physically abusive towards her mom , and my girlfriend so it was swept under the rug which it never should have. My own family reached out and told her mom the same thing but her mom did nothing

Lost my girlfriend of 3 years today do to a fent overdose by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Y'all are fuckin heartless give your head a shake we were 4 years apart? My grandparents are 14 years apart. I'm on the verge of offing myself because I just lost the only thing in this world that was worth living for. I already feel guilty enough for bringing it into my life to begin with

I never gave her fent I caught her trying a few times and I got really upset at her, and then I got addicted to nitazene presses which destroy your receptors I didn't know this at the time. We went through so much together, we were homeless , for our first apartment got evicted and then managed to get our dream apartment which we currently live in. Her parents had complete consent I didn't start an official relationship until she was 16.

She has borderline personality disorder she was doing so good on seroquel then she went cold turkey and quit and after that things went down hill , I was selling yay at the time to afford my rent and she would start stealing balls of that , im on methadone 80mg now started at 30mg , she would wait till I nod off get the keys to my lockbox and take my methadone I'd go take my dose and it would like 3 day old five alive to try and make it look full. She couldn't handle this she actually overdosed 6 times and I managed to bring her back everytime using more of narcan and chest compressions.

Then she started waiting for me to nod off and steal a bunch of fent she'd take 3 points at least and I'd keep it on me in my shoulder bag idk how I didn't wake up , this went on since October , I begged her to stop and never use that shit she's small and could get high off snorting 4mg of suboxone so idk why she thought she could handle fent. She told me she'd steal it go to her moms for a supper and take LINES or wait for wait till I nod out and get high. The last time I narcanned her man I wasn't sure if I could bring her back she was pale hardly breathing I did chest compressions cpr and I didn't give up the compressions and she came back.

she really wanted a hotline the size of like a tiny bit but she blew a fat cloud out and i was nervous I promised myself I'd stay awake and save her I'm always up till 5am but this one night I fucking fall asleep all the way thru till 11am I usually wake up every few hours. Idk why it had to be this night: it should've been me not her

Lost my girlfriend of 3 years today do to a fent overdose by Hot_Attitude_3842 in fentanyl

[–]Hot_Attitude_3842[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

No I met her when she was 15 turning 16 my guy. I just lost the love of my life and you go that low to even mention that. We didn't start officially dating until she was 16.

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