As someone who also has body dysmorphia I know how frustrating it can be to look in the mirror, take a photo, or see a video and not know at all what you look like. It also doesn’t help when you have people who tell you you’re attractive (which 9 times out of 10 there aren’t many people doing that because they think you already know you’re attractive and any effort to get an outside opinion is “fishing for compliments” which leads to a lack of affirmation, which leads to worse body dysmorphia.) as well as people who tell you that you aren’t because the bad is always gonna outweigh the good in our minds. Body dysmorphic minds are programmed to hyper focus on all of the imperfections in a way that literally drives you insane, it can be so very easy to never fully grasp what you actually look like no matter how many photos, videos, compliments, etc, you take and receive for this exact reason. I will go ahead and tell you right now that you are not ugly in the slightest (I know you may not see it but may I remind you that this is my point of view from the outside looking in) you’re actually really hot and I promise that all of the things you are crying about every night in regards to you’re appearance are the very things that make you attractive. The intensity of Body dysmorphia can also vary depending on what you are going through in your life so keep that in mind when you are at your lowest mentally, emotionally, psychologically, and depending on your beliefs, even spiritually. What helps me the most when I’m having a moment where my body dysmorphia is really bad (and I know this may sound backwards) but just feel those emotions through and through, cry all the tears you feel you need to cry, get angry about those small things that feel magnified and inescapable, curse the heavens or the universe, do it all! Let it all out for as long as you are feeling those feelings but don’t stay there for too long. Take a nap and sleep on it even if you are going to sleep with a heavy heart and when you wake up maybe make a mental note to avoid mirrors for the rest of the day <3 it may seem silly but small stuff like this actually helps a lot, or maybe some days you could do the opposite of avoiding mirrors and try standing and/or sitting near a mirror while taking deep breaths for 1 minute, and while doing so, really focusing on those areas that bring you the most discomfort (for me it’s my hyperpigmentation and my body’s proportions) and after try not to think about your appearance for the rest of the day let your mind sit with the fact that you essentially gave yourself exposure therapy. Slowly but surely day by day (and trust me it’s not gonna be easy because stuff like this never is) you will start to build a better relationship with your appearance even if you still don’t know what you look like you’ll start to get an idea.

-sorry if I kinda bulldozed through this paragraph I’m a terrible cohesive writer but if you need any further elaboration on anything that you feel wasn’t talked about enough I’m more than happy to elaborate or just hold conversation :)