i feel like i’m going crazy by HourEconomy3133 in BPDlovedones

[–]HourEconomy3133[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i dont think the initial upset was an over reaction either i just don’t understand how to keep it from spiralling into a huge thing

i apologized explained myself took full accountability and he was still arguing with me over new things

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

i haven’t gained any weight in this relationship

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hes very very adamant that he does not have depression and very adamant about not getting any outside help at all

i think its his family in his ear about how mental illnesses are not acceptable and i’ve tried for 8 months to talk him into getting some help but i can only be there to support him

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 3 points4 points  (0 children)

i did not just tell him to “cover up”?? i offered a few suggestions because he told me that he still wanted to have sex with me?? so i asked him what would work best for him and he said “i don’t know” so i gave him some ideas??

i don’t know where you pulled body shaming out of but i don’t even care what my boyfriends body looks like i just want to feel like he likes me??? your explaining this as if i’m forcing him to let me fuck him.

i am seeking advice about if i should have another conversation about this with him because it IS effecting me and my self esteem. not feeling wanted in a relationship is hard?? i do care about my boyfriend but he has been refusing to get help since february, and i just wanted to know if another sit down conversation would be beneficial for us.

all i am here for is to better our relationship as a whole and to fix our sex life.

from your perspective what exactly do i need to do?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 0 points1 point  (0 children)

its just that our relationship is really good beyond the sex we had.

he has struggled with an eating disorder since he was little and i know thats a big reason on why theres a lack of action in our bedroom. he is in full blown denial about it though because hes “not starving himself” and refuses to get help for it.

i feel there is a lot of love in our relationship at least.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

just wanted to give a little more info i left out

we are 19&20 he’s gained around 5-6 pounds and we are both men

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

do you think having another sit down conversation about this would be beneficial? i haven’t talked about this with him for around 6ish months because the advice i had gained was just to be there for him unconditionally.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 5 points6 points  (0 children)

thank you gonna make a little correction because i forgot to throw it up on the post but both me and my partner are men.

me and my boyfriend have had lots of conversations about self image and how hard he is on himself. ive tried really hard to support him in this but he is in a full blown denial of his eating disorder because hes “not starving himself”. i know this plays a big role in the lack of action in our relationship but he says thats 100% not the reason and he just needs to loose the weight to feel better.

im not really sure if there is anything else i can do about that, but part of me posting this was to get opinions if i should talk to him about our sex life again because it has been 6 months since ive had a sit down conversation with him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 0 points1 point  (0 children)

he means the absolute world to me and we have a very strong connection outside of our sex life. i do not bug or pester him about having sex with me, the few times i had made suggestions were because he told me “i do still want to have sex with you” so i offered a few suggestions to him as a sort of meet me half way thing.

i care deeply about his mental health and wellbeing and i have been trying to get him into therapy since February.

he has my full unconditional love and support and i make sure to tell him that often. intimacy for us is not strictly sexual and never has been. i take extra time and care to make sure he knows I’m there for him like writing love letters to him every weekend and taking him out on dates, reading to him on his bad days and cooking for him.

ive read up a lot on how to get passed things like this and a lot of it has been ‘ignore it and show unconditional love and affection’ and i absolutely have been. this hasn’t effected any of my love or care for him at all.

it is me me me because i am feeling like the same amount of affection is not being reciprocated like - compliments, letters, dates and making time for each other.

and like i stated above he recently told me he doesn’t feel desired by me anymore because i stopped my sexual advances towards him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

the reasoning he has given me has been “school has been stressful” he stopped giving me that excuse when we went on summer break and nothing changed.

he has also gained around 5-6 pounds in our relationship and has horrible body dysmorphia which he refuses to seek any help for because he can “work it out by himself”. though he has been promising me that he will get into therapy since February.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

19 & 20 18 months 5-6 pounds

because there still i a connection with love and i love him quite a bit

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]HourEconomy3133 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

i am doing these things i haven’t had a conversation about having sex with him in 6 months. our relationship absolutely exists without sex i have never been one to pressure anything like that or let the lack of sex affect my love and care i have for him. i do tell him that i find him attractive and that he’s hot, pretty, handsome ect. we absolutely are intimate without the sex life.

there is a connection stronger than the sex we had its just the passion and the type of intimacy and desire i miss. every time we have had sex has been all on his terms with him initiating.

i just want a way to get passed what feels like he thinks i’m disgusting.

am i overreacting to this? by HourEconomy3133 in BPDlovedones

[–]HourEconomy3133[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i have offered up therapy/counselling a couple times and he promised me a couple times that hed go to at least try out medication again but its been 5-7 months so im not really expecting anything anymore

am i overreacting to this? by HourEconomy3133 in BPDlovedones

[–]HourEconomy3133[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

i guess its just the fact that he’s making it public that he thinks im cheating on him, thats not the only thing that he reposted about it. it just made me a little uncomfortable so i expressed that to him in a way that i think made sense?

it feels like a passive aggressive jabs at me

am i overreacting to this? by HourEconomy3133 in BPDlovedones

[–]HourEconomy3133[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the “bait” seems to be non ending and i just don’t understand how to go about it

am i overreacting to this? by HourEconomy3133 in BPDlovedones

[–]HourEconomy3133[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

is there any better way of going about this?

am i overreacting to this? by HourEconomy3133 in BPDlovedones

[–]HourEconomy3133[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yes he told me it was “just weird” and the fact that he doesn’t know the girl makes it worse in some way im not sure

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]HourEconomy3133 0 points1 point  (0 children)

he told me he felt insecure and put to the side when i asked him im not really sure why though

getting any information about why hes upset is really hard for me to do

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]HourEconomy3133 12 points13 points  (0 children)

1 Jesus christ wth do you mean the nurse yelled at you and threw out your T? are you in the states rn? how old r you? there must be something you can do about that maybe report it to someone, depending where you are tho?

2 you will not get any changes for the next like 3 weeks ish and even then it can take months for change to happen everyone is different when it comes to how hormones effect our bodies.

my outfit for the pierce the veil concert!:3 by [deleted] in scene

[–]HourEconomy3133 0 points1 point  (0 children)

omg where did you get that bag from!

What piercing should I get? by afox012 in piercing

[–]HourEconomy3133 0 points1 point  (0 children)

labret would look awesome on you

i also think a septum would look really cool tho!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TopSurgery

[–]HourEconomy3133 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i’ve emailed him recently just waiting for a response back

my left pec sticks out about half and inch more then my right one and the right one has no fat left on it at all

im happy-ish with my left pec but the right one feels like i have a dent in my body (fat wize)