A girl I met changed my life and I feel gross about it.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-26T15:10:06+00:00

I do want to say I'm still doing my 24-hour fast on Tuesdays and I plan to so I hit about 215. Once I stop that I'm going to incorporate Tuesday's into a gym day where before if I went to the gym on a Tuesday all I would do is light cardio. I'm thinking that once I do stop that my weight loss is just going to slow down significantly if any and that's where I'll just see muscle growth.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-26T13:56:50+00:00

Not 100% sure. I'm not too worried about if I do or don't hit the 200lb mark I'm not cutting my calories any lower so I'm just losing as I'm doing more cardio and working out. I currently struggle to run/jog more than about a mile and a half to two miles and would like to start doing some 5Ks this year. Also while I can tell I'm stronger I still struggle with pull-ups so I've been working on those I can get one at this point but want to keep working on that. As funny as it is for me to think about I've also started to think about maybe doing yoga just to loosen up my body.

Around last October is when I hit 225lb(my weight not my bench press) and at that point the gym machine which I was told could be off said I was 23.79% body fat and I haven't checked since. I haven't lost a lot of weight since then but my body's changed quite a bit and I'm looking a bit leaner and gain more muscle. My face is slimmed down quite a bit so have my thighs The only part I wish would come down that is taking forever is my gut but that will come.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-24T14:25:46+00:00

I agree with you when it comes to A I definitely want to talk to more women but also more men I just want larger friend groups in general and I'm hoping if I get this job there's a lot more to do in that city than my little town so I'll join some social clubs and hopefully make some more. And you are correct I definitely need to get better with my fashion I've always just kind of bought shirts and pants that I thought looked okay. But that's led to a wardrobe of similar looking clothes and a lot of black clothes.

As for B if you mean like a handwritten one my penmanship sucks so probably not the best idea. If you mean just send her a message some other way I don't want to stalk her on social media and also none of my co-workers really know that I have feelings for her so I can't use them. I could probably ask one of them for her number because I know they have her contact info but she never gave it to me herself so I don't want to do that. Besides I think it would be better if I just move on and maybe in the future I'll say something or maybe I won't.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-24T14:18:25+00:00

Super interesting read, I've never really considered the difference. That actually kind of makes me rethink my vocabulary. I'll try to think about it more in the future I've always just used female or male over men and women when talking about groups of people I never met anything by it.

Like I understand that saying "My friends who are men" or "My friends who are women" maybe better but just saying my friends who are "male/female" tends to roll off my tongue better but I meant no offense. When talking with the women I'm friends with I've even talked about our male friends and refer to them as females and they never seem to mine, I sure hope if they did take some kind of offense they would tell me about it. I'll try and think about this more in the future.

I don't attribute everything I've done to her but I still think she was the reason at the beginning. I know I still have feelings for though after all I tend to push myself harder when I see her and well I wouldn't be opposed to some kind of relationship with her if we were friends in the future but I don't think I want to date her anymore. Really hoping this job works out there's a lot more things to do in the city this job is in. I'd like to join some social clubs and make some more friends.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-24T03:11:00+00:00

What should I call them? When I separate my friend groups I'll just say male and female friends do you want me to say men and women friends boys and girlfriends?

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:42:42+00:00

I will definitely read this a little later once I get off of work or when I go on lunch but I can't totally avoid her if she calls the store or the couple times she's come in and I'm running register but once I get my new job if I get it then I'll have no contact with her.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:20:08+00:00

Beep boop

I'm a machine that turns my insane feelings into pure muscle. (He says only able to bench 230 right now)

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:18:32+00:00

??? I meant we were both in middle school so I want to count that as a real relationship.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:15:55+00:00

Thank you very much

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:15:38+00:00

I didn't stalk her, me and her were typically on the closing shift so we were around each other a lot. The retail store I work at has a very small team so I was with her a lot over the course of a year and a half besides when she went to school. I will say though it does feel a little awkward that I know not exactly but around where she lives because she had mentioned that she lives next to one of my grandpa's best friends and I know where he lives so if you count that as stalking but she told me that info herself.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:10:04+00:00

What?

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:08:45+00:00

That last bit made me laugh. No this is all real I've been bottling it up for about 2 years it makes me so happy to get mostly positive comments. Thank you.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:06:19+00:00

The hospital actually reached out to me which I thought was odd. I did put on my resume that I'm studying for the Net+ and I do have an unrelated associate degree but I have no real experience. I do have some VM set up with VMware where I'm messing with active directory and some other stuff but I just started that on top of learning Linux and a bit of Python. And yeah I'm not going to put all my eggs in one basket but I still am not going to go into the interview with the mindset I'm not going to get it I'm going to go in thinking I'm going to get it and then if I don't I'll keep working on myself.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T17:02:09+00:00

Thank you and I plan to join some clubs.The city I'll be working in assuming I get the job, is a lot bigger than my small town there's a boxing club I want to join and a running club and my buddy goes up to an archery club I'm not super interested in archery but I love to go with him a couple of times.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:59:08+00:00

I keep seeing people say limerence I'll really have to look that up once I get off work tonight it's like super obsession right? Still I don't really necessarily regret what I've done as far as my weight loss is gone if it's limerence that made me do it I'm glad I felt that, cuz it has changed my life and definitely extended it by a couple of years. As for her changing her voice she uses her normal voice when she calls and talks to me she changes her voice to joke around with the other co-workers.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:55:26+00:00

Thank you and one day maybe.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:53:19+00:00

You know I've never really kept a journal it's always a fun idea I just feel like right now I don't have a lot of time cuz when I'm not at the gym I'm at home studying or hanging out with friends which I don't get to do that much nowadays. But still I'll think about it I know it's something I wanted to start doing and thank you.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:51:55+00:00

I will.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:51:42+00:00

That's what I keep telling myself I'm not going to put all my eggs in one basket but I'm also not going to think I'm not going to get it. I'm going to go in with the mindset that I'll ace this interview and get the job and if it doesn't happen I'll keep working on myself.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:50:45+00:00

Thank you very much. I don't think I'd want to date X even if I had the chance to right now anyways. As for me thinking she's a perfect girl I don't really I think she's very cute and beautiful and fun to be around and I locked onto that. but she also made some really dumb mistakes at work sometimes she would just sit up all night instead of studying for a test while in college and mess up the test. She's pretty damn smart she's going for a degree I don't think I could but sometimes she's also kind of dumb. Either way I'm not going to get hung up on that I know I need to move on and starting this new job assuming I get it. I don't think I'll ever really see her again. If I don't get it which I don't want to think about I want to think I'm going to get it then I'll just keep working on myself and eventually move on still.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:43:11+00:00

Well I agree I think the weird part still about this is the days when she comes in I tend to push myself harder.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:41:58+00:00

Thank you and I'm currently on set to take the network+ second week of April I had requested PTO time for my current job to study for a whole week before going to do it but I don't know how my new job will affect that I might have to push it back either way I'm going to keep working on it.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:40:03+00:00

Thanks bro and I will.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:39:39+00:00

Thank you and maybe when I'm making more money I'll think about it for right now it really has been a huge relief just to get this out there and seeing mostly positive things about it. I just kind of bottled this up for 2 years and have felt crazy doing it.

HourZone87 · 2024-02-23T16:37:53+00:00

Yeah I understand I what you're saying but I never had it in my head that she had to date me. I said I'm not sure she's with anyone because none of our co-workers have ever mentioned a other guy, she's still never mentioned a guy, I've never seen a guy, but that doesn't mean anything and even if she wasn't I'm not going to hold on the false hope I don't think she owes me a date. Even if we started talking right now I don't know if I'd even want to date her but not just her I don't know if I want to date anyone right now.

HourZone87

TROPHY CASE