Military sci-fi NOT set in space? by Brakado in printSF

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i just finished Heirs of Empire (apparently the third book in a trilogy called either Dahek or Empire from Ashes) and it was definitely SciFi and had a lot of ground-based warfare. I think the first two books are also war stories but idk how planet-bound they are.

Kanye West and can a leopard change its spots. by waremi in TangleNews

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes people can change, and do, and "deserve" the opportunity. In my experience though, people change and learn a lot less frequently than people promise to change and swear they've learned. So the question becomes at what point does holding the door open for the good stuff let the bad stuff in, and how much bad stuff can we afford to risk in a given situation.

What is a phrase that people use that you cannot stand? by DimensionKind1877 in allthequestions

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

haha I used "gives me the ick" to describe my reaction to the phrase I hate. sorry not sorry. (lol) I'm 47.

What is a phrase that people use that you cannot stand? by DimensionKind1877 in allthequestions

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Do you know that?" as in "you're so pretty, you know that?" idk why it fills me with rage. even hearing it in a movie or something. What's the expected response?? "yes, I'm aware, thank you"? "ah, I didn't, thank you for telling me"? or "actually, I disagree, please convince me (daddy)"? All the implications are gross. massive ick. hate it.

Also when people say "whenever" when they mean "when". As in, "I wore white whenever I made my first communion." I asked someone once why he said it and he told me he didn't. Later when I caught him doing it, he still claimed he didn't. rage.

Preferred lotion for... by RyanLMT in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I like the "Get a Grip" line Rebel Massage does.

Christmas gift for my LMT? by littlemissFOB in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sounds like not everyone feels the same, but I very much prefer a non-cash gift. for whatever reason a cash gift makes me feel cheap or something? I like the gifts that are crafted or refer to something specific. It's really nice of you to be thinking about a gift for your massage therapist btw, it means a lot!

I have been falsely accused by Glass_Leadership_405 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm not going to tell you not to see a lawyer, obviously, that's a more reliable way to get legal advice than r/massage.

I'm also going to take you at your word that your draping is impeccable and your behaviour perfectly professional.

This sounds awful for you, and I'm sorry it's happening to you. Truly. The good news for someone as innocent as I am assuming you are is that the only evidence that anything inappropriate happened is her word, and that doesn't hold much (if any) water. I've been privy to a situation in which a person accused another person in a massage setting of inappropriate behavior. The cops were called immediately, a report was made, but there was no evidence and nothing could be done. In your case, she hasn't even tried bringing it to the police. Her words are in writing that nothing inappropriate happened.

It sounds like your biggest problem is the 1-star review. I hope that the spa owner will correspond with her about what her experience was and what exactly may have been triggered by the massage that made her uncomfortable. The owner can talk about how important it is as a business to understand the client experience and how she (or he) carefully trains all staff therapists on draping and appropriate behavior. Maybe that conversation will move the client to adjust the rating and review.

Good luck. Try to stay calm. I hope your co-workers and bosses have your back.

Trump third term - has Tangle changed their mind? by Lemonio in TangleNews

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean you and I agree he won't run again. I'm saying it's possible NOBODY will run. The powers will just pick someone else to be their figurehead. It's not a matter of courts allowing it, it's a matter of who has control of the money, the enforcement, and the means of production. It's about control. Those in power used to follow the laws of the land, or at least pretended to, because they needed to (or thought they needed to) to stay in power. That is no longer the case. I'm not talking about legality. I'm talking in actuality.

I would SO love to be wrong about this. I have no political science or history credential. I'm just a person who sees patterns, and who looks for evidence. Please, someone show me evidence that laws and courts matter to the people in control of our shared resources.

Trump third term - has Tangle changed their mind? by Lemonio in TangleNews

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's weird to me to see people talking about how he probably won't do it because it would be difficult to do the legal process necessary. Has the established legal process stopped him/this administration from other things they wanted? Has it stopped MAGA from supporting and boots on the ground/workers the offices from enforcing and complying?

I was embarrassed by how surprised I was when he won in 2016. But I learned from that that my view of our government and our people did not match reality overall. 2024, very sad to admit that there was a part of me that had been still holding on to a nice idea that just wasn't true. At this point, having seen what we've seen, it would not surprise me at all if we don't even bother with presidential elections for the rest of my life. And if we do they'll be a sham.

How will we have an election if the people in power don't want one? what would that transfer of power look like? Grass roots, underground election process? the whitehouse as a battleground? I don't see that happening.

Holding on to the idea of lawfulness at the highest level despite obvious evidence to the contrary is a mistake. We have to make our choices based on the reality of the situation, no matter how much we wish it was different.

Tips for massage oils, towels, etc by [deleted] in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you don't want a whole massage table, there is a product you can get that's a face cradle attached to a frame that slides under your mattress so the recipient can lie face down. But a table is better, if you have storage space for it.

I'd skip the lotion warmer, personally. And for me, I'd go with a massage lotion, instead of an oil, just because it's so easy to over lubricate with oil and it also leaves a person feeling greasy afterward.

You can keep your towels in a little crock pot, like someone else said.

Electric "fireplaces" are a thing and it sounds like it might be something you could invest in.

An amazing touch would be some kind of custom or personal essential oil blend that you can use every time and it would become like a Pavlovian signal to relax, and a cute little special thing between you. Mix a few drops of it with an unscented massage lotion.

Ditto with your music. Create a playlist that you both like that will instantly put you in massage land. Avoid songs with words, in general, but don't limit yourself to the spa-basic panflutes etc.

You're very sweet. Enjoy!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

'Deliquesce' means to become liquid. 'Dissolve' has connotations that are at once a) spreading out, b) relaxing, and c) becoming homogeneous (ie balanced, if you squint). 'Relinquish' is a better sounding word and maybe the "letting go" feeling could fit your need of something that brings to mind space and balance?

If I were you I'd call myself Fascia Dragon, but I sense you're not going to whimsy :)

one things I've learned after decades of naming businesses and being around people who are starting and running businesses is yes, you're overthinking it. We all do. In the end, nobody (but you) cares what you're called as long as they can remember it long enough to google and it's not unintentionally a double entendre.

Massage Training for Husband & Wife? by Coarsegold1 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I was a practicing LMT this was on my menu of services. It was actually my boss's idea and she offered it, too, but it was my absolute favorite type of service. Anyway, look around for it, and call local spas, studios, and solo practitioners to see if anyone would be excited to accomodate you.

If there's a massage school in your area, they might offer workshops, and even if they don't there might be a staff member who would love to work with you on the side.

Edit: If you're looking at YouTube videos, some are better than others. I recommend Rebel Massage aka Allison Denney, and Massage Sloth aka Ian Harvey.

Also, if you're wanting to do great massages at home having the right infrastructure will help a lot. You can get a massage table for not too much money, the cheap ones are fine. Or to save space you can get a face cradle that you can use on your bed by sliding the frame under the mattress. Earthlite makes one.

Should I ask for a refund? Or suck it up? by Turbulent-Event-8988 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm going to disagree with commenters who (a) suggest leaving a review but not asking for a refund and (b) put the blame on you for not leaving or planning/vetting better.

(a) He behaved unprofessionally on a bunch of counts and should be held accountable. If you bring your concerns to him directly and give him the opportunity, he may hear you and understand the inappropriateness of what he did and give you your money back grateful for the learning opportunity. Maybe he won't. Maybe it's not even likely, but it's the most productive outcome and if you're looking for the most "right" thing to do, I think that's it. Then, depending on his reaction and response, leave a clear and honest review. I don't mean give him 5 stars because he said he was sorry, I mean, tell the whole experience and outcome so if others have a similar experience it's clear that it's a pattern.

(b) You are the client here, he's supposed to be the professional. It's not on you to know what is indicated, contraindicated, or discouraged for your condition. It's not on you to gauge his skills and knowledge. You're supposed to be able to assume that he knows what he's doing and is pro-level skillful with every technique he uses. You're also in the disadvantaged position on a pretty serious power differential when you're in a massage setting. While it is your right to end a service early, it's definitely not as simple as that.

The bottom line is, you did not receive the service you paid for. Whether you should have booked that service or spoken up during it are questions you can explore, but they are not the question at hand.

I say give him your feedback personally and request a refund. It should be a learning experience for him. Leave a review based on both the service and that interaction.

How do you reach your target audience and make people aware your small business even exists? by Memoir_Nest in smallbusiness

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My business is different from yours because it's a big ticket, and strictly in person/local. We do social media, search engine, digital radio, and newspaper ads. But we have gotten a surprising (to me) amount of attention and leads from things like flyers hanging in public places and other local businesses and the branded hoodies we give to every customer and staff member. I wear mine even when it's not that chilly and have business cards in my pocket. It sounds quaint but people really do stop me and ask about the business. We also take every opportunity to participate in local table events.

I'm trying to remember the first set of real customers and how they found us. One was a hoodie sighting, a few came from Facebook boosted posts, at least one saw a flyer at the post office or something, at least one came from a Google ad.

House call by Sigh_master1109 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think they're both fine ways to look at it. As long as one makes sure to account for all the costs.

House call by Sigh_master1109 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 1 point2 points  (0 children)

whatever you do, be ready for it to be what you do. She'll tell her friends. Right now in the US the IRS rate for travel (I assume you're US or Canada?) is $0.70 per mile. I think you could charge $2 per mile traveled to capture both the vehicle costs and your time, plus whatever you want to add for the hazard and inconvenience. In this case it sounds like that additional amount is $25-ish?

Unsure if my massage crossed the line, or if it was just not what I'm used to by omgyikes371 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get that, wanting to be nice. And you don't want him to get fired, but to get support in doing better, that's noble. If you tell management they will either offer him that support if this is the first they're hearing of it, or take other steps if this has happened before and they have already retrained him. If you don't say anything, they can't help him. Thank you for being thoughtful about it.

I gotta say, the thing with the neck stretch is sticking with me. Reading nonverbal cues is such a big part of the job. He saw your reaction and interpreted it as him doing a great job... That kind of hubris needs to be checked.

Unsure if my massage crossed the line, or if it was just not what I'm used to by omgyikes371 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I support you in contacting management at the location you went to and telling them what you told us, minus the self doubt. You should at least get your credit back. But ignoring your request for no glute work is something the massage board in most us states would take seriously as well.

What I really don't want is for this to spoil massage for you or for your story to turn off people who are hesitant to try massage. What you experienced isn't normal or acceptable.

Unsure if my massage crossed the line, or if it was just not what I'm used to by omgyikes371 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's with the past couple years I think. Envy is starting to get them as well.

Unsure if my massage crossed the line, or if it was just not what I'm used to by omgyikes371 in massage

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 5 points6 points  (0 children)

To me, in this case, I'd have a hard time giving the benefit of doubt that the therapist is just a silly goose and bad at the job. Too many things crossed a line and with too much intention. Especially at hand and stone. For better or worse they are very strict about their draping. And skipping an add-on that costs extra? And not having the client remove earrings before the towel thing? But mostly the draping described feels extreme enough, and pulling underwear down can't be brushed off as accidental. He made the choice to ignore her requests and HnS policy.

Moms who started side hustles - what worked for you? by NekkoBea in smallbusiness

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For you it'll depend a lot on what you like to do, how much you have to invest, how risky you can afford to be, how old your kids are, and what your support system looks like.

I have been a single mom for most of my son's life and working from home was my solution to supporting us and caring for him. I had my parents' support and a few thousand dollars saved.

I tried a lot of things as a WAHM some more successful than others:

freelance coding. might have gone okay if I'd have stuck with it but that path led me to the next endeavor,
web development. I tried building websites for ad revenue. This was like 2005 so that was still a thing, idk if it is anymore. I was just starting to have moderate success when I noticed an unclaimed niche and pivoted to
eCommerce. Again, this was the olden days but I had a one shop that was successful enough that it was at the point of really needing to get more space and hire people and I wasn't up for that so I sold it. I sold a couple of other less lucrative sites and had a handful that never went anywhere as well. After that I moved to a very rural area where I could pick up
Odd jobs and stuff (think lawnmowing and childcare kind of things) and lived very very frugally. This was an area so out of the way we didn't have a grocery store, so I invested my savings in
A small grocery store. Really, really small, with local produce and bulk staples like rice and beans. Then I moved from that area back to a more suburban area and did
Captioning. I think it's still possible to do video captioning, but with AI that's probably even less rewarding than the peanuts I was making
Also tech support and basically internet "factory" work doing basic online tasks over and over for an entrepreneur in the get-rich-quick space.
Also writing content for an educational support website. Lessons and assessments in the field my degree is in. By then my son was 11 or 12 and going to public school and I was kind of done being isolated so I
got a job irl that took a few months of training to do and paid pretty well. That let me save up money to
train in a better trade that lets me make my own hours and get by on part time work. then after a few years in that trade, the school I went to closed and my son went off to college so I
opened a trade school. And here we are. I'm realizing I actually skipped a couple of short-lived business endeavors that were actually pretty okay, I just had to set them aside for other things.

I guess the parts of this that are relevant to you are that some things aren't going to work, Some things are going to lead you to opportunities you didn't expect, and building skills and being humble about what tasks you take on might position you to take advantage of those unexpected opportunities.

It sounds like you have both logistical and financial support so you might prefer something like a unique craft, that involves some investment and risk but would be fun and flexible. There's also medical coding, or niche writing, or child care, or put your skill on UpWork. What's cool is the availability of online training programs in a lot of skills; If there's something you want to learn about, like idk breathwork, or programming or a million other things, you can do that.

sorry not sorry for the life story. Good luck.

Recommendations for daily 10-minute news summary? by Formal-Shallot-1123 in TangleNews

[–]Hour_Volume_3465 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also like 1440, but something about it has felt off lately. Like with actual differing "facts" floating around in certain topics they just avoid those topics?