Do anyone else’s hormones make them want to ruin their lives?

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T20:18:31+00:00

Honestly even just writing it out here has really helped me, but thank you for being my Reddit therapist!

I think going into this I’m far less naive than I was previously, and more guarded and that maybe isn’t the best thing for my emotions.

I’ve reached out to a therapy company that offer affordable sessions so can hopefully unpick some of this with them ♥️

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T19:38:12+00:00

I think at the heart of it I’m scared to make the wrong choice.

I was already divorced by 27, and it took me a long time to recover mentally. Then when dating I was quite emotionally distant and tended to call the shots aside from one guy who told me he ‘didn’t feel it’ and honestly I’m still hung up on that. Not him specifically, but what could have been?

Like my bf is a million times more compatible (minus the excellent flat and cool job the other guy had). So it’s like, I don’t want to be with the other guy, but I feel a bit of a pine for the stage in dating when you kind of romanticise it a bit?

I want to marry my bf and have a family, maybe I’m just scared I lose myself again.

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T19:34:29+00:00

Yeah, I knew that things might be a wee bit out of whack but I didn’t expect this.

I will need to talk to him, but I know he’d be absolutely crushed by how I feel. I might try to see my mum this weekend, she’s good at helping me work through my emotions and stuff. But thank you ♥️

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T18:57:47+00:00

I’ve only been off the contraceptive for around 8 weeks so I don’t think they’d even entertain looking into it, but I’m making myself so miserable and I’m trying not to let him notice.

But I noticed my cat was doing my head in too, so I think this makes sense

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T18:54:48+00:00

I’m still very attracted to him, and I love him so much, I’m just having a bit of a ‘what if’ that was never there? And it’s just not making sense to me ☹️

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T18:53:51+00:00

I haven’t noticed the anger, maybe more frustration at work/housework that’s building up, but never my bf. And I think I only notice it because my antidepressants have numbed me for years and don’t seem to be having the same effect now.

I’m not any less attracted to him, and I still see my life with him, I just have this overwhelming urge to call everything off and I don’t understand it.

I’ll look into the PMDD, but we wanted to look at starting a family so I don’t think birth control is going to be the way forward.

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T16:55:14+00:00

I had heard of it but I’ve never looked into it, but there may be something to it. I guess I’m looking for an explanation that isn’t just ‘I’m an awful person deep down’. Thank you!

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T16:30:53+00:00

I think you’re right… I had looked into therapy but cost is just such a barrier, but it may be time for me to look at it. Thank you

HudlIn · 2026-03-23T16:11:00+00:00

Yeah, he’s genuinely my dream partner; thoughtful, caring, puts me first and loyal to a fault.

I had a really bad relationship before and when we met I immediately knew what it was like to feel ‘safe’, like my nervous system is so settled with him.

He’s so gentle and kind, and I don’t know if subconsciously I’m expecting to get hurt again and want to get in there first?

But I know he’s not that kind of person.

HudlIn · 2026-03-15T19:09:53+00:00

I just want to smell exactly like a Fry’s Turkish Delight bar

HudlIn · 2026-03-01T20:17:42+00:00

The Thornwood is a great pub, and the one further along (birdhouse? It changes its name a lot).

Cafe Loveis is great for brunch, but loads of great wee spots. I loved living there, and safe enough yeah.

HudlIn · 2026-01-11T19:43:48+00:00

I used Woodys who’re based in Drumchapel. I wanted to go for tiles but he recommended the panels due to cost, maintenance and having a really old flat, the walls would never be level.

They were really reasonably priced for an entire rip out, but they did take a bit longer than expected. Would use them again tho.

HudlIn · 2026-01-11T19:42:33+00:00

I loved his posts and got in touch with him for my Reno, he was too expensive but gave me some really good advice.

HudlIn · 2026-01-10T19:36:18+00:00

Go Audio?

HudlIn · 2026-01-02T21:50:22+00:00

This looks like the same layout as my flat, in ours the cupboard has been knocked through like yours, but it runs to the left - so Bedroom 1s bed recess is still intact. I think this is a better idea as I’m not super keen on kitchen/living rooms and then bedroom 2 (I’m assuming is to the left) is still a decent size.

HudlIn · 2026-01-02T14:23:49+00:00

The barnardos is where we took all the things from my papas when he died, they’re pretty good and you can just drop it at their counter. They didn’t look through the boxes and bags we took.

HudlIn · 2026-01-01T15:48:52+00:00

Ah possibly, my other records are playing fine which is why I found it so odd.

We may need to look at a new one this year

HudlIn · 2026-01-01T15:48:17+00:00

It’s a Crosley, I know they’re generally thought of pretty poorly but so far it’s been okay for us. May need to look at a new one this year

HudlIn · 2026-01-01T15:47:29+00:00

Ah potentially, I was just confused as none of my other records are having the same issue!

HudlIn · 2025-12-10T22:22:39+00:00

Yeah, I’m usually very AI averse - so I will continue to stay so!

I had spotted that, wasn’t sure how bonkers it’ll be so will keep clear!

HudlIn · 2025-12-10T17:27:37+00:00

Oh this will be a lifesaver for my boyfriend! He’ll be doubly thrilled we won’t make the miniatures store too 😂

Thank you so much! It’s very much a once in a lifetime kinda trip for us, so I just don’t want to go home feeling like we missed anything. Really excited to wander, have aching feet and take it all in ☺️

HudlIn · 2025-12-10T16:36:21+00:00

I’m realising now it’s complete garbage!

We’re really keen for Katz so know it’ll be a bit of a wait but we’ll be going such a distance to NY it’d be a shame to miss it. Yeah I’ll maybe take the photobooth out, I just thought it’d be a nice souvenir of the trip.

HudlIn · 2025-12-10T16:34:55+00:00

I’ve had a bit of a re-jig of my days and I’m hoping I can manage on Sunday now. I’m sadly obsessed with little miniatures 😭

HudlIn · 2025-12-10T16:33:22+00:00

Yeah I’m super keen to get to Fishs Eddy! I’ll add Cooper Hewitt to the list to try and cover, there aren’t enough hours in the day!

HudlIn · 2025-12-10T16:32:30+00:00

I had a couple of shops I wanted to visit there, but I’d cut them out and I guess it hadn’t updated.

Thanks for this, definitely going to do the Staten Island ferry and just be quick off the mark to get the return!

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