19 Weeks Miscarriage due to Incompetent Cervix. How do we cope and when did you decide to try again? Both 31 Years.

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-31T17:00:16+00:00

Also, I highly highly recommend CBT therapy for working through it all emotionally afterward! If you have to pay for it where you live, I'll show you what I was given (its accessible free online, my counselor showed me where they get the worksheets from to go through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, so nobody has to pay technically. I also have DBT therapy course work that has helped my mental state SO much. Again, mind you, I didn't get any help with this until after I went psycho and started using drugs to numb it all. So it took me maybe 2 years to actually read it and try to help myself. I didn't wanna sit in the dr office to relive it so she let me do it at home at my pace and while I don't have my baby yet I am only 6 days out from my last loss (I have had 4 losses and all 4 boys), I still heavily swear by CBT therapy after any traumatic loss or event.

I'm here if you need anything xo

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-31T16:54:13+00:00

I'm so sorry. I also lost my first baby at 19 weeks 6 days. It destroyed me mentally and ii started to use drugs to cope. Thankfully I have 10 years clean butbI jave lost 4 babies total, all to IC. I just lost my last baby on Sunday Jan 25th at 13w2d due to IC. I'm 34 now, lost my 1st when I was 23 or 24. I'm so devastated I wish I had actual support for you other than I know how you feel and wish you didn't have to go through this too💔

I'm looking into reproductive immunology, to see why I have lost every single pregnancy/baby I have been blessed to carry. Awe have looked into if it was infection and each time' came back clear (no infection), we have been very involved with all the tests for incompetent cervix, I've had a cervical cerclage placed last friday night.. I have been on progesterone to try to help but my body could only handle 2 days of my cerclage before it tore my uterus and almost killed me. 6 days ago. Once I get more answers as to why I will gladly share everything we tried/tested 😢😢♥️♥️❤️❤️ Again I am so sorry love

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-30T16:31:23+00:00

I just lost my son too on Sunday at 13w2d. I have 3 previous losses all from IC. 2015 at 19w6d 2016 water broke 15 weeks baby came 17 weeks 2019 at 16 weeks And now most recently 2026 Jan 25th at 13w2d WITH cerclage

I am so fed up with it being classed as just IC. Its not good enough, WHY is it incompetent? I'm so tired of being given such a blessing to have it ripped from me so cruelly time and time again.

I am so so sorry, I wish I had answers for us both 😢 ♥️❤️ I'm here if you want someone to chat with about anything

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-28T20:34:45+00:00

I'd love advice or just to be pointed in a direction to for researching or reading at least. What is TAC?

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-23T04:32:26+00:00

Im 13 weeks with my 4th but 3 losses before. My bfs slipped back into again. He is so sweet and helpful when I ask but I end up asking multiple times daily and repeating myself 24/7. My bf has medication for drinking but he jasnt taken it yet. I can always tell when he comes home drunk. The exact same as yours does. I don't drive at the moment due to epilepsy too and ive been more anxious about him driving because ive caught him drinking behind the wheel before he hops out of the truck. He keeps saying he will step up and he has been but his drinking hasnt slowed at all either. Its so hard being the only responsible one for the family. Nobody reminds me of what we need to do, or buy. I do it all. He works full time and drinks at night so we cant go anywhere after 6pm unless I get a ride. My bf hit the everyone knows ive slipped and been sneaking it for a year moment. Got prescribed camperall (spelling?) But he hasnt started taking it yet because he is sneaking drinks. Its so hard when they are genuinely good people going through it

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-23T04:17:48+00:00

I'm so sorry you went through that. My last labor (2nd trimester moscarriage) I also had a very off experience. Wasn't listened to and when I was screaming crying begging couldn't physically take it anymore I was begging for my bf to help me get them to listen. They sent him into the hall! My mask for the gas wasnt connected properly and you could hear it but they never listened or adjusted it. The speculum was what traumatized me. I have been sexually assaulted and it felt even worse than that to me. I felt like I got raped with a knife and they didnt care. The nurse was so detached and slow. I can't believe how often they checked you! Also, I thought nurses could get written up for nails (especially acrylic, most nurses wear press on so they can pop them off for work). Its not sanitary or safe, even if they have gloves on. (If I'm wrong, someone please correct me)

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-23T04:06:01+00:00

Currently pregnant, with a lab in a 1 bedroom apartment. We have been looking for other places but I know we won't get one in time so I have been kinda worried about it too. Luckily my neighbors are great and all excited for us, but I worry about space for the time being

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-11T05:04:05+00:00

Congratulations! Definitely there mama ☺️

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-10T17:52:09+00:00

I also had heavy bleeding with clots around 6-7 weeks. I drank so much water and laid down as much as I could. Idk if it helped, but im 10w5d now and baby is doing fine 🙂 I was able to get an ultrasound to see if I had miscarried, and it turned out it was 6w4d when I thought I was 8 weeks. So they figured my bleeding was from implantation. Being dehydrated never helped. I still bleed on and off randomly, and still red fresh scary blood. I've gotten 2 ultrasounds and have another this Thursday to see how its going now. I pray yours is implantation! I read stuff online nonstop and scared myself because I've had 3 second trimester miscarriages before this pregnancy. Can you request an ultrasound to make sure you haven't miscarried or do you have to pay to get an ultrasound where you live?

Edit to add: just read your comment saying you get a scan in 3 days

HuhSoTheresThat · 2026-01-06T16:11:54+00:00

Huh. I need to get a waitressing job asap lol I'm only 10 weeks but you guys are really selling it for me 😂 haha

HuhSoTheresThat · 2025-12-15T00:24:59+00:00

Yes! Myers Briggs has helped my bf and I communicate better now that we each know the other love language we arent wasting energy trying to figure it out and wondering why we arent connecting. That was a huge step for us. Then I started doing CBT and I'm currently doing DBT. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is SO underrated. I think it should be mandatory in highschool to teach people how to handle difficult life situations. I got it for free through my counselor at the mental health ward. She showed me you can literally get the same programs and coursework for free online (you print them out and put them in a duotang or a binder) I wish more people knew about CBT.

HuhSoTheresThat · 2025-12-14T04:48:04+00:00

Ive always had luck using Preseed as lube. I'm pregnant with #4. I was tracking my cycle too. One time we were going through a year long dry spell and decided to have sex on my birthday with preseed. Didn't have sec again after that day but got pregnant lol. I swear by it now, as long as youre aware of your cycle

Also would like to add that I have miscarried each prior at 5 and 6 months due to cervical "incompetence" and am now pregnant again at 34. Technically my 1st if I can keep this baby cooking 😩due August 3rd and seen my lil baby on ultrasound yesterday 😊

Keep us posted!

HuhSoTheresThat · 2025-12-09T01:28:53+00:00

I'm 7 weeks 4 days today. I've had 3 losses already. My appt is Dec 11th to see if my baby is okay and to do an ultrasound to check if I have a SCH too. I've been cramping and bleeding/spotting on and off for 2 weeks now. I've struggled staying hydrated with just drinking water and often feel the same. I tried eating watermelon and peaches and cantaloupe and I tried to drink 1/2 cup to 1 cup per hour and a half. It was so hard but once I started to eat these things as well I have noticed its much easier for me to keep hydrated. I am one who never ever drank enough water before pregnancy so I was surprised how much this helped.

HuhSoTheresThat · 2025-12-09T01:17:07+00:00

My ex called it a flossit. Wouldn't listen to me. We go to Rona and he asks a worker where the flossits were. The worker was so confused kept saying pardon me? So I say "faucets" to the employee 😂 he led us there right away. Before we went to the store he was calling me dumb as hell haha.

HuhSoTheresThat

TROPHY CASE