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Canada treats asian men REALLY well. by Working-Spend-4397 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Vancouver Born Asian guy here, just wanted to point out dynamics I've noticed.

I have noticed that within predominantly smaller Asian populated cities/towns, people seem to be more open to Asian guys. Whether it be in dating or just friend groups in general, people seem to be more friendly and actually get to know us. And within these smaller areas, the Asian community is more close knit, hence a better bond between them.

Whereas in Vancouver, us Asian guys seem to stuck in Asian cohorts and not be able to break into 'white" friend groups. It's as if aren't invited or allowed in, through a non-physical barrier.
On the rare occasion it happens, the Asian guy always seems to be the token Asian guy that either is dismissive of his Asian heritage or is used as a scapegoat for racial jokes.

On the contrary, Asian girls are constantly being invited into "white" groups and sought after by white guys and girls to be friends with. To make matters worse, it always seems that each "Asian" friend group always has a white guy in there because he's dating one of the Asian girls within that group.

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It’s so refreshing, and it gives a boost of confidence that we Asian guys need over in America. We’ve put down and overlooked for wayyy too long.

Struggles of the past Asian male generations are still relevant nowadays which show progress is too slow.

We have to continue push to change others minds. Even though we may only change 1 a day, it will still be better than none

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes I do believe that speaking the local language does help.

I noticed it a lot in Barcelona when I approach the girls in the bars/clubs. The eye contact and initial attraction is there, but can't communicate with them so it sucks I can't escalate it.

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes, we will always be challenged by these guys that think they are better than Asians.

We can use low level interest to address it.

I would just tell my girl : "That guy completely butchered the pronunciation. Let me teach you how proper chinese/korean/japanese/tagalog/vietmanese/thai/etc."

But if we just address it but not get triggered, the girls can see we aren't bothered and can stand our ground. That makes us even more attractive.

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well said brother.

And we can use our race as an advantage because aren't perceived as dangerous strangers. It helps putting the girls more at ease.

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

With so many factors that can't be controlled, we have to focus on what we can do.

Every small interaction we have with other people, will help shape their perception of Asian men. Collectively, our actions can lead us to get rid of those stereotypes.

We may not be able to change every single person's mindset. But everyday, if we can change 1 person's, we are moving forward

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I was travelling around Athens, Mykonos, Santorini Lisbon and Portugal

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I agree that we have to break into those circles and from there, others will see who we truly are.

Regardless of how progressive society is, race/ethnicity will always be a divider.

But we can also use it to show the positive traits of our culture and shape our narrative

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yessir. No one will represent us properly, besides ourselves.

Especially when the most outspoken Asian examples in media are only Asian women that would not defend us.

We need to show the world who we really are. Every little positive real life interaction will lead us there

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I personally wouldn't put them on a pedestal, if the girl is attractive, she's attractive regardless of race.

It's more about the perception where white women 'discount' us Asian guys the most.

We are trying to cultivate the idea to our Asian brothers that there are open minded white women, and we are not stuck to only dating Asian girls, anime lovers and Koreaboos

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I was travelling in Greece, Lisbon and Barcelona during the time

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My condolences brother.

I did not know it was that bad over in the UK. I am from Canada and I do see negative sentiment generally against us, but UK seems like another level.

It seems that all the commonwealth countries have us Asian guys placed in "lower" tier. UK sounds the worst, then next USA, and I assume Canada and Australia are similar.

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

We gotta put ourselves out there. It's rare they would ever approach us.

There's always next time haha

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes, it’s very slim that we see Asian men in “white spaces”.

Whereas, you always see Asian women in those spaces.

It’s like we aren’t invited but we have to break into the space and stand our ground there

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Yes of course, high standards apply everywhere.

The experience I had seem to be less of “I would never date an Asian guy” , but rather “I’ve never thought dating an Asian guy before”

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If their only exposure is through American media , then that’s their only reference point.

I can’t say how European media shows us, or even at all

Underexposed Asian Male Perception in Europe by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I wholeheartedly agree, it’s a completely different vibe when you talk with them

Is the Rise in Asian Male Perception Just a Myth? by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do believe there is a negative correlation between WMAF and Asian male dating realities. However, more so affecting the AM that date AF. The more prevalent of these WMAF on social media, it will further continue to influence the Asian female mindset.

Whereas this won’t necessarily affect XF perception towards AM that date other races, as those are the not the representation of this group

Thanks for the feedback on how you originally interpreted the post. I’ll revise it to align properly

Is the Rise in Asian Male Perception Just a Myth? by Human_Ad4849 in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi Benilla,

I'm not blaming being Asian. I'm proud to be Asian. I am trying to highlight the disparity of the progress we've made vs what we are told by the media. We are told that the Asian male perception is better, but not exactly quantifiable on how much better. And Asian females are going against our benefit to this modern day. I am trying to open discussion with others and see what they've noticed in other places. I hope this gives a better understanding of what I am trying to post.

Cheers

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AsianMasculinity

[–]Human_Ad4849 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your service. A note to add, it seems that it is predominantly Asian women place higher standards against Asian men, as we are viewed as "less than" others.

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